Topic: Child Psychology

Alan Donovan describes his transition from a high-conflict separation to a positive co-parenting relationship where he views his ex-wife as a close friend. He emphasizes the importance of looking at the situation through the child's eyes and listening to their feelings about both parents. By being open and honest with his son, Xander, Donovan aims to prevent the psychological damage often caused when parents treat each other as enemies.

Tracy Poisner details her 25-year background in homeopathy, human psychology, and child development, which informs her coaching practice. She explains that while she initially focused on stepmoms, she realized many core issues—such as loyalty conflicts and parental alienation—fundamentally belong to the biological father. This realization led her to focus on helping dads navigate post-divorce conflict and restorative parenting.

Tracy Poisner explains that because a child identifies as 50% of each parent, disparaging an ex-spouse directly harms the child's self-esteem. When a father badmouths the mother, the child internalizes that criticism as a flaw in themselves. Maintaining respectful language is presented as a crucial act of kindness that ensures the child feels safe and "okay" regardless of which household they are in.

Jensen and Collins discuss how fathers can support children experiencing anxiety or panic attacks. Collins suggests a breathing exercise where the child traces the outline of their hand to regulate their heart rate and focus. Jensen shares an analogy he uses with his son, comparing difficult emotions to waves on a beach that can be jumped over or allowed to pass without causing a total collapse.

Steve Lovell discusses his approach to step-parenting, emphasizing the importance of being a "mate" and a consistent presence rather than a dominating figure. He advocates for explaining the reasoning behind rules to children and resolving conflicts immediately rather than letting them fester. Lovell highlights his 18-year conflict-free relationship with his son David as a result of avoiding the "domination" dynamic common in parenting.