Episode 18 - A Christmas Eve story - The gift of being seen

00:54 You're listening to The Business of Stories with Susan Paton, showing you how to share stories that do the selling in your business so you don't have too. She wasn't having a great day before she'd even left her house. She got in her ice-cold car and after waiting for the freezing windscreen to thaw she drove to the train station She wasn't looking forward to the busy commute and she certainly wasn't looking forward to the meeting she had that morning. As she approached the station, she was met with a wide familiar smile Heather Barry of Harry's Coffee had seen her drive in and already had her coffee on-the-go just how she liked it! And her favourite bread browning in the toaster But as the lady got closer, Heather sensed that she needed something else today

01:51 Before handing over her coffee, she asked her if she wanted a hug. The woman nodded and Heather gave her a warm reassuring hug She was right! It was just what the lady needed and she really appreciated it She even started to feel more positive about her day Is the value of what Heather does in the coffee & toast she makes? Or in the familiar warm smile, the friendly face The moment of connection in our customers' hectic, stressful lives. It's both but that feeling of connection – of being seen goes way beyond the product and service that Hither sells

02:40 If you're listening to this episode on the day it's released, then it's Christmas Eve and I'm so grateful to you for choosing to spend a little bit of time with me on Christmas eve or any time over the Christmas holidays. It's such a mad hectic busy time of year! So the fact that you've chosen to take a moment out of the chaos to tune into this podcast means more than you'll ever know So thank you so much for being here with me. Christmas Eve is actually my favourite day of the festive period! Ever since my eldest daughter Amy was born, and she's 32 now – so it has been a while – Christmas eve has always been very special in our house

03:29 When Amy was little, I was a single mum but had some very close friends who would always come over about 5 or 6 o'clock on Christmas Eve and we would spend the evening eating yummy food having a few drinks playing games and opening the presents we'd got each other. We did that for years Then in 2008, I left London and my friends behind and moved to a farm down on the south coast of England to marry my husband who's a farmer. And have another daughter Daisy but the tradition continued and does to this day now every Christmas Eve My husband goes and picks my dad up and brings him over to stay

04:15 Amy arrives about six o'clock with bags of presents and a huge smile on her face. She's as excitable as I am! And Daisy sets the table, makes name cards even though we always sit in the same place and eyes up the presents mounting up under the tree We always have a raclette for dinner one of those grills you put in the middle of the table and then everyone cooks their own food We have marinated chicken and steak and prawns, and lots of yummy things like dips and salad and garlic bread. Then we all open a couple of presents and play some games! And I love it so much! This year is going to be a bit different though because Amy's been away since September travelling around the world So she won't be here in person but will be doing lots of FaceTimes

05:09 The other thing that's different about this year is that this is the first Christmas ever that I've had a podcast. As I record this, I'm 18 episodes in and I was reflecting today on all of the things I've been talking to you about over the last 3 or 4 months. I was thinking about themes that have been running through and underpinning all the topics and stories and messages that I've been sharing with you And I realised one of the golden threads that connects them all is about the gift that we all want. And not just at Christmas, this is a gift we all want every day! It's the gift of being seen We all want to be seen and acknowledged. We all want to know that we matter That we're important That we're significant

06:06 At the most basic level, every human wants to feel listened to and understood. Because knowing that we matter to others makes us feel secure It's a primal thing We're stronger in tribes so we want to feel like we belong That we are valued and appreciated member of the tribe Our brain is literally programmed To look for evidence that we matter That we belong So one of the greatest gifts you can give to the people who come across you is to make them feel seen and heard and understood. Giving people that gift will create a connection like nothing else can, And the most powerful meaningful human way to give them that gift is through your stories

07:03 I've talked a lot over the last few weeks about how sharing your stories is so important for your business and how you're not sharing them for you. You're sharing them for the people who read, hear, feel and connect with them and catch a glimpse of themselves in them! Your stories can help people feel seen and heard and understood – and less alone So, if you've ever wondered whether your content matters? Whether your stories are landing? Whether anyone is listening? I want you to know. Your impact has a ripple effect that you will never fully see! You'll never know how many people your content has touched this year including all the ones who never liked commented emailed or reached out to you

08:00 You don't even fully know how many people your work has touched this year. What the ripple effect was of you helping your clients feel calmer or more in control, or more confident... Or how helping them get the result you helped them get allowed them to show up the way they wanted to in their personal life and professional life That's the thing when you show up with intention and purpose Your impact extends far beyond what you can see or what you can measure. So never doubt that your voice matters, your work matters, your story matters and there are people you haven't even met yet who will feel seen encouraged comforted inspired because of something you're going to share next year! Your stories are a gift

08:59 A gift to all the people who feel seen because of something you shared. And I can't think of a better gift to give! But also remember to give to yourself too Christmas often carries a lot of expectations and pressure and mental load And if this time feels chaotic or exhausting or emotional, or not quite how you expected it to feel... that's okay. Christmas isn't about perfection It's about moments imperfect human real moments with the people who matter Sometimes the kindest thing you can do for yourself is just slow down take a breath soften the expectations

09:49 And know that you are enough, more than enough. Just the way you are! So I know it's Christmas Eve but as always i want to give you a simple action step that you can go away and do here is your action step for today send a message to someone who made a difference to you this year someone who made YOU feel seen someone who made YOU feel understood You can share that on social media if you want to or simply send them a message of gratitude. Let them know they made a difference, let them know they matter, let them feel seen because that's a beautiful gift to give anyone this Christmas and whether this festive period feels joyful hectic or a bit of everything all at once right now I want you to know that i see you and i'm so grateful that you're here

10:53 Listening to this podcast, sharing this journey with me. I want to wish you a wonderful happy peaceful Christmas whatever that looks like for you and i'll see you next time for more stories that do the selling for you so you don't have too Thank you so much for being here. I love that we get to do this together! Would you do me a huge favour and please rate, review and follow this podcast in Apple Spotify or wherever you listen to your podcasts? And i'll see you next time for more honest conversations meaningful connections and of course stories