The Wrap Up #22 - Mixtape or Spotify

00:00 Hey, welcome. It's Friday. It's the wrap up. This is Team Super Dad. We are here to celebrate our week role theme. Welcome to team super dad real dads creating their best lives ever more time more money more fun you are not alone your on team super dad Welcome dads, welcome anyone. Mums and dads people who listen on a regular basis it's Friday and it's the wrap up my name is Jonnie if you've been here before then you know this is our celebration of the week It's good to celebrate keep yourself going highs and lows in days gone by we'd have been in the pub would be nice in the pub on a Friday chit-chatting having a laugh

00:50 And if we were about 20 or 25, we'd have probably been getting blind drunk before stumbling either home or on for the rest of the night perhaps. Those are my London days! Today Glen is back on, Glen's part of the wrap-up crew and last week we completely balled up the sound because I had some weird echo going on and this week even though we did a sound check it does sound a little bit like i'm sat in the cupboard which is because I had the wrong mic selected in StreamYard So all the gear, no idea is kind of one thing that springs to mind. But I think more positive than that you don't have to be great to start. You do have to start to be great and having a live guest on and chit chatting...I think obviously I'd do that with the guests but in this kinda conversational podcast version with Glen on I think i'm a little bit nervous maybe? Nervous of balding up! And so yeah, no surprise, I bald it up!

01:44 Anyway, it is a lot of good chat. I know you're going to enjoy it if you hear for the first time welcome If you back there make sure to subscribe To give us a review to share this with friends to spread the word far and wide about Team Super Dad Enjoyed a conversation. I'll see on the next wrap-up In fact come over to team super dad comm join the community If you want some one-on-one dad coaching then you can register for that there Check out the hero Academy as well and next intake comes in January It's gonna be awesome enjoy Hey, welcome. Welcome to the Friday Wrap-Up. Myself Jonnie Jensen, creator and founder of Team Super Dad and joining us on the wrap up

02:28 Last week with an echo which failed miserably, I'll take responsibility for that. This week we've done a sound check and we're all cool! Glen aka The Dating Dad good to have you here sir. Lovely to be here lovely to see you dancing as well the great thing is it's like a silent disco because but you could hear it in your headphone I can't hear a thing so what I could say I can see you dancing um but yeah not a thing going on in my head my head or my ears at the moment so I'm not joining in just yet Yeah here's the thing just cause I can hear it in my ears doesn't mean All the gear, no idea. But week by week we do learn and evolve and it is actually important message because lots of people don't even get started so then you don't have the experiences A guy in another awesome group on Facebook that I'm part of is called Tiers Of Freedom It's like a wealth manager money make money he's got some business stuff tied in there as well And what about being in tier one then?

03:23 No, it's not Patrick. The guy Jason who created it he said it was a really good name before anyone used the word TIRS every day of their life but no he made these on YouTube and his videos from He's done like on his 150th video or something like that and he's gone from obviously one listener which was his mum right through a watcher viewer, right through to you know half a million views and this sort of stuff. And the difference between the first video and his video now is unbelievable it's it's...and that's how it should be! It should be I think it's not just his mum watching it half a million times isn't it? Repeat repeat! I love you so much

04:10 There was something on Spotify when someone did that. They recorded about like 30 seconds or a minute of silence and then just asked all their fans to play it on loop while they sleep, and then they just got paid like a fortune in royalties just by their fans listening to nothing! I think that's genius. I think you could game the system that way. Absolutely so listen everyone if you've not joined The Wrap-Up before this is our celebration of the week that has just been Episode 22, including 22.1 if you include Glen and I's drink bottle opening... It was a rehearsal! My friend Nan used to think that the lunchtime neighbours was the practice for the 530.

04:52 But anyway, if you've not watched the wrap up before this is the celebration of the week that's been. And if you're listening in course because you can watch it or listen right? Zig Ziggler I was listening to...I love Zig Ziggler all his old stuff and Jim Rohn but I was listening like this week as I think he was a Jim Rohn one and he was talking about vision and the difference between that vision and goals so vision being something that you like it's a long way out there but it's what excites you and it's what you live for. A goal is part What you're doing towards that vision. And he took it right back to celebrating things that go well for us, because if we don't celebrate the journey along the way all the highs and lows then how do we keep momentum up? How do we keep committed? How do we work towards our vision so?

05:33 That's why we do the wrap-up. It is also intended to be a little bit more fun than the conversation, the longer episode during the week. I love it! As you speak my daughter is literally holding up signs she just got back from school and apparently there are some things outside so yes bring them in the house. Get out of the rain, do your thing earn your keep. Brilliant. I'm working with kids hard I know. Who said the Victorian ages are tough on kids? Come on! The Victorian age was the greatest age of this country's history, if you take out all that we did and yeah kids need to learn their place Yeah why can't kids mine coal or clean chimneys come on Exactly They've been practicing playing bloody Minecraft for something long enough they should know the skills by now

06:24 There we go, exactly. Who would have thought if you told a Victorian about Minecraft they'd be like yeah my kid works at the mine all day what are you talking about? So on today's wrap up we are looking at Spotify or MixTapes, Tiny Gifts and other Amazon adventures... it's going to blow your mind when I show you that! Christmas traditions Good ones and bad ones. And the Best Year Ever, which is a preview of Monday's DadCore, which is coming up and something I've done this week with a couple of different coaching groups. It's about richly Auditing the year that's gone by and then kick-starting the new year, so it is a pretty cool thing. And then Do Dads Need Coaching? which is an interesting conversation that comes off the back of something I got asked this week! And finally bit of a pushy parents' conversation Swimming Karate Music or Swimming Karate Music and The Things That Us Parents Force Our Kids To Do So thank you for joining us on The Wrap Up It's about half hour 40 minute jaunt through all that

07:22 So, Spotify or MixTapes. If you go on Spotify there are a couple of Team Super Dad Mix Tapes and being someone who's 46 child of the 80s playing record on Sunday night on The Chart Show... You've got to miss the adverts as well! You've gotta miss the adverts, miss the DJ talking over the end as well that was always the real fine line you had to tread Expertise, yeah. I even got into splicing my tapes and stuff! Um...I got a stereo for one birthday that had a high-speed dubbing feature on it so you could turn a 90 minute tape into 180 minutes tape. Wow!

07:59 I had some audiophile mates and they used to go on and on about, oh no you only want the short tapes because the quality of the longer tapes isn't good. That's fine! And i kind of agree but... You must have been rich kids because that meant you could have loads of tapes. So I've got one tape, I can afford one tape and I need it to last as long as it possibly can so I don't have to go out and buy loads more ones. Oh man! There's some context to that which we've lost because of the last week's episode, but when you were a youngster you were like piled into your house with all your brothers. Ah yeah one of... living as one of six so I'm got a stepsister as well so one of six with two adults and a massive dog sitting in some dodgy little three bedroom terrace council house in Walthamstow on a council estate it was not exactly salubrious and luxurious growing up. Exactly!

08:55 and anyone who loves, uh was it Derek and Clyde with the ep- you know? Born in a barn you lucky fellas! Was it Derek and Clyde or Monty Python? Genuinely genuinely when people say oh yeah what luxuries did you have. Luxuries?! We didn't have carpet, we had a telly that been given to us that was black and white and yellow because it was meant to be a colour telly but the other colours didn't work which is why I've been thrown away which is why we had it this this was not luxurious living but Yeah, definitely. So on Spotify or MixTape right? So there's a couple of Team Super Dad Mixtapes on Spotify which I hope if you go and check out your search up Team Super Dad on Spotify they will remind you what it is all about. As well as the podcast yeah you are welcome to but like Spotify does my nutting! I used to find music easier

09:48 When I could go into record shops and stream music online, then go into a record shop or even HMB somewhere especially living in London they had lots of stuff. And then I would find artists on the back of Compilations or labels would do a best of their label type thing. Ray and Christian, then Grand Central the record label up in Manchester. But on Spotify they just seem to feed me this... The algorithm kicks in and I either get... It's quite nice sometimes because it gives me stuff that I already know I might be looking for but I find it hard to unearth new music

10:25 Do you? I find it a lot easier. When i had, um...I used to have a bit of a problem with...not problem as such that makes sense more than anything else but no go into HMV and I would find it impossible to leave there without a dozen albums and so I've got this massive, massive CD collection which was brilliant and great but it meant that you'd listen to them over and over again because you know you've got a finite number of records. Whereas now you have access to everything! And i still have to think back to my old cd collection and think okay what did i have that i really enjoyed? It's hard to think about some of those old things whereas normally you just kind of stumble along your collection going oh i haven't listened to that for a while

11:06 But, that being said the algorithms they really do work. There's these made-for-you ones not just looking at ones you've already listened to loads but where they take those that you listen to loads and then give you other suggestions I must have listened to about three thousand three and a half thousand new artists this year just because of random stuff that Spotify threw up on me. Oh! I'm doing it wrong there's something wrong I challenge my kids constantly to say, right find new music. Give me something that you'd actually enjoy and sometimes they do sometimes i'll message my daughter's really into k-pop uh and really weirdly um recently i've discovered a band called Baby Metal who are a j-pop metal band so imagine like K-Pop

11:49 And that is your Music Taste. Well, I mean what... Almost everything. Pretty much! Um i'm not a massive fan of country and western or a lot of modern R&B old school R&B you love um but modern R&B is just dull and repetitive but yeah pretty much anything and everything so I can go from jazz to garage to metal to opera to um to ska to Motown to soul whatever it's

12:38 I've got such varied tastes that it means i'm very rarely bored and it means that i've always got a different playlist to listen to which wouldn't happen if all i had was what was on my shelves. Because, I wouldn't necessarily know that something was good...I wouldn't want to spend 10-20 quid on a random Japanese Jpop album if i had no idea who they were! Well, and we've just discovered how close we live to each other. This is like amazing as well! So that we can totally hang out and do music sessions. I just don't... Pretty much thrash metal is pretty much where I don't really go. In terms of metal, if any heavy metal fans would actually die when they hear me say this but i did have a Def Leppard album which I enjoyed when I was about 13 or 14! That's as close as I got into being a heavy metal fan but apart from that

13:31 But as much as I love Spotify, actually over lockdown i've started going back to my roots a little bit. Last year for Christmas I bought myself a proper record player quite nice one and I have nabbed a load of my dad's old vinyl and then bought myself some new vinyl and it really rediscovered me, reignited my passion for certain albums so I'm starting to build a collection of absolute seminal classics that you can just listen to over and over because when it's on vinyl recording, you have to listen because you have to turn it over. Which means I'm actually listening to the music a lot more than if it was just random Spotify shuffle going on in the background! Exactly

14:12 I struggle with the word seminal because it sounds so much like a school name. Yeah, you can go to the wrong sort of nightclubs if that's the distinction you're making! Listen on the subject of presents check this out... We've got two people at disservice if they listen to the podcast about tiny gifts okay? Tiny gifts and other Amazon adventures. You talking about little gifts that don't mean anything?! Right check this out I'm holding up a piggy bank. Bring it closer to the camera, so we can see it. It's tiny! Here is a debit card next to it... To describe it, it literally could hide behind a credit card. What is it? True, it's a piggy bank. So my daughter dropped her piggy bank and she's nine right now, so this isn't like a piggy bank for her B or an N door. She has got a rooster card as well which by the way love Rooster. Try GoHenry and Rooster. I am a rooster fan

15:08 I'll put my affiliate link in the show notes. But yeah, so she bought us a piggy bank and I'm trying to get stuff for the Father Christmas sack thing... The stocking fillers! It's literally the perfect stocking filler because it is so bloody tiny. So that's going back. Did you know it was that small though? No, that's why it has cracked me up. You expected it to be like a full-size piggy bank the size of small football or something? Yeah, most piggy banks are grapefruit sized. Whereas thats what about tennis ball or something like that? Well probably is a tennis ball if you squished a tennis ball down little bit but its just £7 as well I mean you can decorate again for people listening rather than watching

15:58 I have to confess, I've bought nearly all my presents again on Amazon. Ah the great tax dodging giant that is Amazon! And i wish i could sit here on my high horse but um you know what it's 2020...I thought I'd done the same just about everything has been amazon just because you can't go out and randomly walk around the shops in a minute so it's just way easier to have it all delivered yeah well other people deliver by the way well they do So often with all the other ones, what happens now is what happened with Amazon years ago. I remember... it must have been about 10 years ago. Amazon was a thing but it wasn't the giant that it is today. I've always been a firm advocate for digital and this is my job, my love and my passion. And I managed to convince my brother for the first year to do his Christmas shopping online. I said mate, this is so easy you can get loads of stuff have it delivered! He ordered it sort of mid-November

16:54 Not a single gift turned up by Christmas Day. It all turned up in sort of January, February time I've ruined online shopping for him for a decade. Ever! Forever yeah it's true during lockdown i was like bought some clothes normally buy clothes uh quite often for the kids in in Morrisons because their kid's brand lasts really well they're kind of grown out now but um took four weeks I'm going to give them a little bit of lockdown grace, but guys... I mean that's the other thing. I got Amazon Prime because it is just so much quicker to get everything. You get used to that level of service and if i'm going into some random shop in the middle up the high street, I don't know they're gonna turn it up on time? They're gonna charge me for delivery? Will it turn up at all and

17:44 What's a new package like? Whereas Amazon, as awful as the tax things are... I do want to have a word with Jeff about that. Next time I speak to him, I'm going to give him a kick! But take the taxings out of equation they're best for a reason and so yeah they just do their job don't they? It's just beautiful. So why don't we all work like that? So Anna will go back and I'll try find another one Have you actually finished all your Christmas shopping? Pretty much the only thing I had to get was a kids pajamas which we do before, we do like one present. One present before Christmas Day. You don't do free presents do you? Well never used when were kids but when they were babies somehow or other as we started of family tradition which is they kind of comes from America from families in America so they get a new set of Christmas pajamas

18:33 Well, not even Christmas pyjamas but they get a new pair of pyjamas on Christmas Eve. So they wear the new pyjamas to bed and they wake up in the morning and they've got new pyjamas... Yeah my old man started doing that he comes around with a box obviously you can't this year but it normally comes round with a box in the boxes exactly that plus a Christmas movie and some popcorn maybe some sweets or something like that so he wants to shove sugar in their face on Christmas eve I'm off in the pub, you charge kids to bed. Yeah so they do the same sort of thing but as far as iIm concerned no Christmas Day is what it is and that's that... In fact we've got a thing when doesn't they've got their stockings open in their bedrooms and uh they're not allowed downstairs until I'm awake and then they're not allowed to open a single present until I've got a cup of tea

19:23 And I don't, now they're older. I don't have to make that tea myself! That's pure bribery and then it all goes to hell. Yeah but you got 16 down to nine right? Uh yeah uh down to seven. Down to seven so the seven-year-old is like would you not wake up?! I seriously need to open my father Christmas presents! Although i think she's probably the eldest that wakes up earliest to be honest because I think she really wants to get everyone up and ready and excited because she knows what's probably downstairs Well, I say to my guys because the question of Father Christmas comes up right. This is the Christmas tradition section of our little running order. Father Christmas questions come up and as far as i'm concerned Christmas is way better with Father Christmas

20:07 Oh yeah! I'm just going to, guys. I'll happily have that conversation if you're ready for it but just so you know it's not gonna change the point that Christmas is way better than Father Christmas and quite honestly I believe in Father Christmas because I've no bloody idea how I afford each year so there's some kind of miracle going on Oh I did that this year, i got all their presents and well...I'm not gonna say too much because my oldest is home from school and she's sitting over there listening in but um yeah. I did get all their presents unwrapped them from their Amazon boxes Christ! There's a lot of Amazon books unwrapped them spread them out and realized it doesn't balance out so I've had to be topping up here there and everywhere It's been a bloody nightmare Yeah good you mentioned Christ as well over Christmas Well yeah

20:51 I'm very much the other way around. This is purely a celebration of capitalism! Yeah, exactly and here's a serious point about Christmas right which i do want to try in the wrap-up to make some serious points. Some families row every year they row and that just breaks my heart because Christmas in my family...and I'm sure I didn't see the rows that went on at Christmas But it's always been such a happy time. Always, always been such a happy time whether it is my family in America or whether its my family here It just joyous! Its silly The presents work, father Christmas presents in the morning, lunch, walk, family presents after lunch You know...it just works and My only memory of it Is being fun And I was talking with one of my dad coach clients One of the dads I coached this week

21:48 And it was about the arguments that he has with his partner generally, but apparently pretty much every Christmas. So it was about what could they do to make a commitment for Christmas that they weren't going to sweat small stuff? That if there were no batteries for the flippin' whatever Tonka toy I've got memories in my mind of that white truck thing that you used to program the numbers in the back. And if there's no batteries, then no batteries! We'll work it out we'll get some more but not whose fault is it? Why has this blooming happened because find reasons to laugh like something goes wrong make a commitment to just laugh about it with each other because as well as its not the memory want leave our kids

22:35 It's like you've worked all year towards this event, and not literally but it is pretty much the culmination of the year. A celebration of all things that are happening in our family if your religious then there is that side as well but it should be a family event It should be, but it's so tough for so many people and for so many different reasons. I mean not least of which financially and this year more than any other year. So many people have been hit so hard by the corona and furlough and so on that financial pressures are massive. And now is the time a year when you know we... People want to share their joy they want to share look at all the presents my kids have got and look all the fun things were doing or the food we're eating, drink we're drinking

23:18 And then you've got other people who can barely afford their rent and they feel, what could I give up myself in terms of my own health and wellbeing in order to provide just one more present for my kids? So the pressures on people are massive. That really doesn't help for me as well! There's other things that go on at this time of year. I haven't got into my background too much, but i'm fairly open about it over the Christmas period several years ago was when my wife was having an affair and so every year at this point there's all those throwback sort of things that trigger things for me so there's always a bit of emotional stress and to top that off now we chatted children 50-50 which means

24:00 This year, I'm not going to have my kids on Christmas Eve. I'm not going to see them Christmas morning or eat Christmas dinner with them! I don't get back till the evening of Christmas Day which is...I'm looking forward to that but everything... Have you got a plan? Yeah, I have. I'm going to be drinking heavily until the very early hours whilst doing my wrapping and hopefully sleeping through it and having a hangover for the morning instead of Christmas dinner because that for me is fun celebration thing. I'm gonna do a massive Christmas fry up for my Christmas dinner. And I was invited around my sister's house but

24:36 For two reasons, or three reasons I've decided not to go. Firstly because loads of people are going and we're not allowed to so there's too many households and all that sort of thing. Secondly she charges 40 quid a head for the food! I mean...I could feed my entire family for Christmas dinner for £40! Is this is skit like a punchline coming here? That's what actually happens Absolutely. Every person she charges 40 quid to feed them Christmas dinner, it's like Christ fuck off! But then the final one is the more serious one of I don't want to be around my family and everyone with their kids and being all happy and joyful because all i'm going to do is i'm going to get sad because i haven't got my kids

25:19 Yeah, this year I'm going to spend Christmas Day, Christmas morning all by myself. Feeling sorry for myself drinking heavily but not too heavily because i have the kids back in the afternoon and evening so I've got to be sober enough to look after them and open their presents and eat and drink a lot more Oh man, that's... So there are two messages here. If you're still in a relationship then clearly work it out between you and find out if one of these is having an affair. That's a good thing to do check that out! Just ask right? Just wondering. Second of all if that's not happening really commit to having a laugh like whatever goes wrong just having a laugh about it And then yeah this family I know has not got much money this year

26:00 We sent a guy last year, he had no carpet. And then the Team Super Dad community Daniel Latto actually led that charge and put it in his community as well and we raised about 800 quid. The guy was in Wales. A week before Christmas we got his house carpeted And he had like 200 pounds to go and spend on presents for his three kids. And then I spoke to a church that was in his town, and not surprisingly they were transpired... They were doing a Christmas Day thing for underprivileged families so he took his kids down there. It was just amazing! Like I said, kudos to Daniel Latto for really encouraging that. But from that parents who are struggling

26:51 Of course, there's food banks and situations that have been a real blessing to people but I guess there won't be so much as the pop along to church and things. But Meetup... We'll be here and I think it's not just about physical meeting up, even if you can't go out. Even if you feel because of the virus and so on that you're going to have to stay indoors by yourself... You're not by yourself! And there are going to be so many of us out there single parents and friends who are gonna be online. They're gonna be on Facebook and Twitter and reach out through those chats On Zoom or Meetup you can search for all number of whatever you are in a band, in church

27:31 Monopoly lovers, there's meetups on the Meetup.com website and they're going to be having hangouts I know Fathers Rights UK are having a big hangout There has been some talk about doing something on the Team Super Dad community if people have enough interest to do that for an hour on Christmas Day afternoon So basically just make the effort Whatever is going on for you as this is a message to people watching and listening Make the call now and try and schedule something so one way or another You at least get to see some other people on a screen, on laptop, on your phone and have a giggle or whatever with someone. Yeah wake up dress up as well! Get yourself up get yourself dressed and get you ready for Christmas I mean i'm sitting here sporting my old school this is old school Musa Dembele

28:15 I'm a big Spurs fan and i still listen to a podcast called The Fighting Cock. If you are a Spurs fan or just like good funny random football chat, it's one of the best out there! And yeah they just got the least Christmasy picture of him they possibly could and stuck up all round. Love it. You do look a bit like Flav by the way. Flav? That is that is a sexy bastard so um...I'll take that as a compliment Well, listen running off the back of that subject about Christmas Day and hanging out with people. On Monday night so bi-weekly I do something called The Dad Call and a dad call is completely free meet up for dads and to be quite honest it's men's meetup we're not going to chuck anyone out if they haven't got any kids right? So it's you know particularly in this time that's going on now people are

29:04 Just need to hang out, have a chat and laugh. And that's what it is for We've talked about silly things like being in a band and what beers we don't like drinking and why we don't like drinking them because it's easy to talk about your favourite beer but we had conversation a bit like What's your least favourite beer? Why I struggle with Becks from because I went to student union one night after having two buckets and had a packet of cheese snips and some Becks And so the cheese snips were like eating sand. It went dry in my mouth and I washed it down with Bex, and then had a white tea and threw up! Classic Scooby! So I struggled with Bex for a long time after that but yeah so there's some of the things we talk about on The Dad Call but we've also had people talk literally about

29:50 Well, you mentioned there about the affair of how people say I think my wife's having an affair. People talk about child court and that side of things. We've had people talk about money as well so literally the Dad Call is free if you go to dadteamsuperdad.com forward slash dad call then you can literally put the ticker on because they're URLs in there as well You can sign up for the Dad Call. And the reason I say sign-up is not because it's paid or anything like that, but just we need to make sure people are coming in who are supposed to be coming in, Because it is private, It's not streamed, it's not recorded, it's a safe space for dads to hang out and chat This Monday I'm going to do something called The Best Year Ever

30:29 Which is a coaching process. It's 10 questions he holds up one hand, 10 questions both hands and it's the first few questions are about how this year has gone and the second set of questions are about next year, the roles that you want to take on, the goals that you've got tactics to achieve those goals so people go on about these old plan your year like what should be done and goals setting and all that's great but this is a 60-minute process Easy and fun, especially there's a group of us doing it. So we'll have a laugh and do that. So get over to teamsuperdad.com forward slash dad call and get involved on Monday nights Dad Call. It starts at 8 o'clock normally runs about an hour. Excellent I love the chat about vision and goals because having a vision without having goals is the slowest way to get to success and having goals without a vision is the quickest way to failure so um having both of those is what you need to have in place oh I like that Glen! We can get that on our T-shirt or some sort of poster

31:24 I love how Guy is helping other guys out. I don't know about you, but i love the ability with my mates to switch one minute you can be taking the piss out of them really being brutally funny and really aggressive about something and then the next minute you just change gear and it's into something serious again um and guys are just able to understand when to joke and when to be serious. And so whatever it is, whether you just need a laugh or whether you need something a bit more serious that sounds like the sort of place they were to me anyway I've not done it myself yeah yeah we'll get involved yeah i mean it's exactly like you said there and i don't know it's amazing men obviously i'm not a woman so i don't know if they're as good at this as us but that ability

32:09 The Jonnie Jensen Show, Jonnie Jensen, Glen, Team Super Dad, Spotify, MixTapes, Amazon, DatingDad. Slip into a new group of lads and get straight into the banter. And like you say, the piss taking can all especially if half your mates are scousers, that piss-taking can start almost instantly without it being offensive or taken as offensive I've got this universal language around football, which means you've always got even if you hate football or even if your rugby person or cricket personal whatever. You've always got an opinion on it and meant so use that as your initial point you work out where your boundaries are everyone and then bang into it and you've always got that thing to rotate around which is lovely

32:58 Yeah, exactly. So I mean Team Super Dad is in essence a large part of that as well because there's the coaching around the key areas of focus fitness finance and family but the fifth element is fun and the reason for that it too many dads are not having about fun as they should Very true, very true. We're under so much pressure and so on and pressure some of it we put on ourselves and some of it is on this changing role of being a dad in society because you know when look at our dads my dad he's still relatively young 60 but His generation of dad, I genuinely don't think he's changed a nappy in his life. And he's got four kids growing up and God knows how many grandchildren but it doesn't do that sort of stuff and so he is not in tune with the emotional side of things

33:48 It'll go down to football, it'l have a beer and it will talk about that sort of stuff. But he's not so much of the touchy feely things whereas dads single dads especially because we haven't got anyone else to do anything with but any dad, any man who wants to not just be a lads lads lads laga laga laga We're making up as we come along and we need sometimes just to talk to someone and say this is what I'm thinking this is what I'm feeling We want to be asking, am I right? Of course you're right in thinking and feeling whatever you want. But... Am i thinking the right things or what else could I be thinking of? What other questions have- what other ideas have you got? And so I think coaching for anyone is useful but especially when dads are changing so constantly the role of a dad is changing that having other people to talk to it's absolutely bloody vital and we just don't do enough

34:35 Yeah, you get stuck in that whole internal dialogue of am I okay? Is this right is it wrong? Am I okay? She this she that. How do the kids feel with that? And never let it out so you go slowly mad yeah absolutely just going slowly mad So just finally, a friend of ours on the kids class today her daughter she just posted on Facebook. Her daughter's just got to the black belt with a white sash. Apparently you can't get to that until your certain age so this daughter is a bad asset! She's one year above my daughter so she's 10 and has got a black belt

35:12 Which made me think, because I took my kids swimming on Wednesday for their last swimming lesson before Christmas the usual, I don't want to go swim. Of course we get there! I don't want to get out! So do you Are you a pushy dad? Have you pushed your kids into things, are they child geniuses? No no well my kids are... everyone thinks their kids are above average and half of us are right. I don't know quite how far above average they are but they're all right so i know they've got skills and abilities and interests but i'm very much someone who wants to give them loads of experiences and see which ones they like

35:49 I'm a massive footballer. I love football, but I never played for a semi-pro side or something or had trials and every dad on the touchline said, yeah, well I had trials... And going canoeing or hiking or cooking or whatever all the things that I enjoy doing now, I learned myself over time. I didn't have anyone...I didn't have a dad growing up really to show me these things so My kids, I haven't got things to force them into but they are getting into things. So my oldest boy he does football and he's a pretty decent footballer plays with his mates. And my youngest son just started MMA that's because his childminders son does it and yeah he got he's got nunchucks and stuff and i think my boys looked at him and thought yeah i want a bit of that! And so my boys he's got his first grading this weekend

36:36 Which I'm really excited about and hopefully he doesn't either kill someone or kill himself. My girls are a bit more difficult! They don't do MMA? No, they could and i'd love them to. My youngest daughter, over lockdown she decided to teach herself piano. So she's been doing a lot of that and now she's got ukulele classes so I think she's more the musical drawing and art side of things but my eldest if it's not K-pop or Korean sitcom then she's not interested in anything! It is really tough and tricky how can i give you some sort of passion something you care about even if you hate it now when your older you'll say yeah im glad you made me do that

37:20 But at 16 that flipping, well I say at 16 that horse has bolted, that shippers sale. But she's got a passion though and that's the worry is if your kids haven't go anything they're interested in By the sounds of it, obviously your music. We spoke about this at the beginning in your music you're motivated and inspiring them to go off and discover music so you've got that inside your family as something that's something that you enjoy And I always say to my kids this was always the intention whether we were still in our relationship or not is that my kids are going to be into something Yeah They're gonna be in a band they're gonna be in football they're gonna be because one way or another that means they're not on their own

38:03 Oh, totally. Alright, how's it going? Even if it was just an awkward nod on day one. It's a good chance that they're gonna become friends and he's not gonna be left in the corner at you know... But it can be really expensive when you don't work out what they want to do so my oldest boy did say dad I wanna be in a band okay then let's find what you wanted he went off and got some drum lessons and so on I bought him a drum kit he's played it twice

38:44 Then he's like, yeah no I don't want to do guitar. So he's got a guitar and now it just sits down there on the side of the thing and you end up thinking right i want to give you everything I possibly can inspire you and give you so you can never say...I could have been a concerto pianist but I never had the... No get him a harmonica! You could be in one man band if you see what I mean. Yeah well yeah just where..just I want you to do something. I want you to find something that you love And just yeah, that isn't... I'm trying to force them to watch movies. A lot of movies every week is at least one classic movie so um iIm hoping that iIm inspiring a love cinema in them even if they don't end up going out and doing the stuff. So here's a perfect way to end then what has been that movie this week? Which uh was the most recent movie? Bugsy Malone! Oh good classic Absolutely brilliant it's one those things where..I hate musicals but there's a handful of which I absolutely adore What was that?

39:40 How old are they? I've never seen Bugs in Malaga really. No, no no you hadn't! They had never seen it. There's a lot of movies that i've been kind of saving and kind of opening up and sharing with them as they go free men and a baby yeah yeah I think the next one...I'm thinking..you might actually have some advice on this do you think Seven is too young for gremlins because that's a Christmas movie It is a Christmas movie. It's quite scary, I've dropped a couple of clangs like that before... Yeah bit awkward now it's too early! We tried to watch Dumb and Dumber clearly one of the funniest movies ever yes absolutely they just weren't ready for it they're like dad this is oh man we turned it off when they were pissing in bottles on and got pulled over and the policeman drank it and that's when I thought that's funny but I think when

40:35 I must have been around 10 when i was watching Blazing Saddles on videos and stuff. But yeah, we do have to just check in. Uncle Buck, a family classic. Oh no that really is a great classic! Yeah there's a couple of bits there which are kind of kissing and a bit sort of you know early teens or I think that's what we forget is when does early teen kick in basically? Okay good so we can have this conversation as well where all on the same wavelength movie wise. Bugsy Malone, the big ending Jodie Foster's first movie appearance by the way And the debut of Dexter Fletcher as well, as Babyface. It's so good yeah and the music I didn't realise all the music was actually sung by the same person obviously a male and female but all the different characters were sung by adult actors and actresses but it was all by the same person until... As i realised that all the songs actually sound a little bit the same now. Ah! Didn't know that. Yeah I recommend having a look

41:32 One movie, we'll finish on this one. One movie that didn't stand the test of time and I watched it again and was a bit gutted it wasn't quite as good as I remembered it was Weekend at Bernie's. Oh, Weekend at Burley's. It didn't stand the test of time quite so well but if I squinted my eyes a bit it was still as funny but... Well I need an example of recommendation for movie for the kids to watch this coming week so yeah answers on a postcard! Okay are we getting Christmas themed or not? Christmas theme's ideal, but not necessarily. Okay yeah, Christmas Chronicles is a great new one and Christmas Chronicles 2 of course which actually... Netflix Prime or something? Yeah Netflix!

42:15 Christmas Chronicles and Christmas Chronicles 2. I shall give it a go, we'll crack on with that and add it to the list of movies that absolutely have to be watched before Christmas. Top of which so you've got Muppets Christmas Carol Home Alone... Home Alone 2's not bad as well Scrooged? Scrooge is still fine! See this controversial statement here you're gonna kick me off the show now but Scrooged, meh! Muppets Christmas Carol is so much better than Scrooged And for me, the pièce de résistance is a National Lampoon's Christmas vacation. Oh! That is controversial! As a piece in the National Lampoon's... Ignore the rest of it

42:57 Okay, but you know just that one against the rest of the natural lampoons Series too silly. Oh Gosh, it's like this is a good chat. We're gonna we're gonna roll this over to next week Yeah, well remember would do can we do a wrap-up or contact back off Christmas Day? Next Friday is Christmas day Yeah, yeah exactly Well I say just for four weeks to finish we are going to die and when I do some kind of Christmas Day check-in with the Team Super Dad community and gang. It could be on a Zoom call, it could be on a wrap up like this... We might do a drinking game we might do a back from the brink! Any dads that are on their own will do a back from the brink special and have some giggles so wherever you're at dads we're here for you. The Team Super Dad community on Facebook hit 150 members this week

43:49 And so we're looking to push that to 250 over Christmas. The teamsuperdad.com website, if you're really in trouble or just need someone then DM me message me call me find out a way to get in contact with me I'm here for you but if you are interested in either the Hero Academy which the new intake of is happening in January then check out the Hero Academy on the website Or one-on-one dad coaching which is always available just go to the Dad Coaching page Glen, good to see you buddy. As always yeah lovely to see you too and speak to a few more people and get to know the community bit more! Nice one and hopefully no echo if you're listening on the podcast be sure to give us a review and everybody whether they're listening or sharing send this to your friends to other dads and get them involved with Team Super Dad.

44:43 This has been Team Super Dad. Find us at teamsuperdad.com Join the program and create the best life ever for you and your children! You are not alone, you're on Team Super Dad