The Amazing Benefits of Journaling - Expert Hangout Podcast

00:00 It's the Team Super Dad podcast and we're talking about the amazing benefits of journaling. And in this expert hangout, I'm joined by Moyra Mackie, Dale Darley and surprise guest Andrew Priestley. Roll theme! Welcome to Team Super Dad Real dads creating their best lives ever More time more money more fun You are not alone you're on team super dad Good evening and welcome to the Team Super Dad Expert Hangout. My name is Jonnie Jensen, I'm the founder of the Team Super Dad Programming System. We are equipping dads to create their best life ever and especially busy dads which in fact is all dad's! If you can introduce me to a non-busy dad then that will be a first for me or they're just not very good dad basically. Today it's an expert hang out which we do on a regular Monday night

00:55 And, but it's also part of the 28 Day Habit Challenge. And there is a amazing habit that can be picked up by anybody called journaling and I guess some people might associate that or know that more as like writing a diary but there are many different ways of journaling and I wanted to include this in The 28 Day Habit Challenge so I put it out on my socials Who do I know the journals on a regular basis and thankfully such is the power of having lots of contacts across the socials. Two wonderful women were introduced to me and we've had lots of chat this week,

01:33 Good for you as well as myself because I'm always learning when i have these conversations. We've got two experts here and they'll introduce themselves in a moment but Moyra and Dale, curiously as you can see from our names only people with alliterations of first name and surname are invited on tonight which did make it more of a challenge but anyway we succeeded uh as you can see actually it looks quite neat doesn't if you had OCD So, yes. Like I said it's a real pleasure to have been introduced to you. Dale would you like to do yourself justice by introducing yourself? You know tell us how what you do for work and where your based because we, Moyra and I just found that out and how you came to be a journaling coach and expert

02:23 Okay, so I'll start with where I live. So, I live in Spain. I live in a teeny weeny little hamlet in the middle of nowhere. The region is Almeria but where I live No one will have ever heard of it, but it's absolutely glorious. It's quiet I'm surrounded by hills and as someone who is a writer this is for me because I love silence This is the perfect spot so I came here about six years ago almost to the week that I up sticks and drove here with my then two dogs

03:00 So I've obviously had to change the way that I work but I still do a similar kind of thing. So, I still help people write books and I do the journaling side so I call my stuff writing to heal – healing all your whatever your stuff is – and then writing to heal the world in whatever way you want to call healing. I don't know, conflict resolution in teams. For me that's healing but my healing is much more kind of like emotional and mental you know spiritual physical that sort of thing so um and i've been journaling i think ever since i was born i can't remember a time that i didn't scribble on things yeah i love it trying to remember for you today and i was thinking when did i start? And i know

03:50 For me, journaling has always been because I needed to clear the clutter in my head. So it's been for a long time. Okay awesome good they got that now i can see Andrew Priestley just in the waiting room as well so he looks like he just picked up the phone actually so maybe I'll hold tight a second there but just to pick up on something you said there which is really interesting for the Team Super Dad community Just you said in the way that I work, you've created a whole lifestyle for yourself with online courses and your businesses online which is your website looks fantastic. The course structure looks amazing and I know from the way that I got introduced to you people rate

04:32 You and I've taken a lot of value out of the courses that you've created. So, I hope that's inspiration for anyone listening to this, obviously the Team Super Dad community but this is being streamed all over the place so mums... This isn't exclusive to dads at all! Just amazing that you've followed a passion, you got your lifestyle you enjoy living somewhere that you love and you're still making money doing stuff that's adding value to people. Absolutely brilliant Thank you. Maybe we'll get you on another day and we can talk more about that whole online business side of things as well, because that falls into the finance and wealth section of the F5 which is the core part of Team Super Dad. So I'll bring Andrew back in when he gets off the phone but...

05:18 Moyra, same as well. Let's introduce you and talk a bit about how you came to start journaling and what do you do? Yeah! Well not living anywhere so exotic that although I was born in brought up in Zimbabwe So I am powered by sunshine And the journal that I'm gonna release is called Journal Safari because it's kind of inspired By that whole process when you go on safari. So I'm based in Hertfordshire I'm a leadership team and career coach And essentially it's about, I'm on a mission to help people thrive at work because we spend so much of our life don't we? At work.

05:55 And they can be pretty grim places or they can be amazing places. If your work's not working, often your home life isn't working and vice versa. So my MSc in executive coaching is like the whole person. It's a relational coaching programme so it's all about who you are how you get in your own way how you show up And I think, I just hate the word professional. I just prefer the word authenticity and i think that something like journaling can really help find who we are or like you said Dale it's about clutter you know journaling can be sort of Marie Kondo for your mind it's like clear the clutter and find out what's underneath there so yeah that's me! Yeah awesome and you just said before

06:42 When you're working with business leaders, it's always telling for you the business leaders that are already journaling or have some kind of notebook they pull out. It's like a success model indicator of success? Oh yeah! I mean it's any form of reflective practice at all so yeah it is...I can always tell when they get their little book out because A5 journal or something, just take them with me. And the ones that go no no don't need that or yeah I'll take yours that looks nice but you know essentially they've got their own then you know already they're in the groove for thinking about what they're doing and how to get better and how to flex to whatever's going on Yeah and that's so important because as a

07:29 A tool, you know as a tip or piece of knowledge. When I interview people when we do these expert hangouts that's really one of the intentions is this is that if we can give people examples that success, we can model success from those that are actually achieving some of the things that we want to achieve. Then that's the best way to achieve success ourselves. If it was running you might want to talk to somebody who has won a gold medal in an Olympic or if its business we wanna talk to someone who has grown a business or led a business and actually had that success for which the rest of us strive for so its important that we notice those

08:06 Those nuggets that are out there. Bedtime is one that comes up so frequently for me when I speak to successful people in any field, they're like oh yeah well i go to bed at this time and I wake up at this time and actually the right time they wake up it's really early! And you can't get up really early if you keep going to bed really late Yeah, there's a rhythm. I think there's a rhythm that people work out what is it that works best for their whole system you know? Their body and their mind and the relationships and the results they've got to get so yeah they thought about it even if...I mean people say oh well that's not naturally me but over time leaders coalesce around something that suits the environment and the goals that they want to achieve. Yeah well you get

08:52 I don't want to be a vegetarian. Well, if you keep eating meat you're going to die! Oh okay yeah give me the vegetables please. You know we do it with... oh Andrew's ready now look i'm gonna bring him in he's giving me like double thumbs up here we go uh actually a surprise guest a bonus guest all the way from sunny Kent Andrew, awesome to have you on board. Thanks for joining us. What a conversation! Man oh man I can't believe the sort of stuff that you just covered in five minutes but so rude...I was already in the chat and I got this phone call from a client in Norway and I just said as you do I'm name-dropping now it was perfect because

09:33 I was waiting for Dale to finish her intro and so you were in the way too, it's perfect. Andrew we've...it says it's awesome that you've I've basically hijacked your evening, so thank you for being so generous with your time there. We were on a mastermind earlier this week, the Change Your Game Business Accelerator and you were doing money mastery like understanding of cash flow and balance sheet. Absolutely amazing session! Thank you. And just in the middle of that, you dropped in, oh yeah well I journal every day... and it was so casual a reference Like, that's just something that you naturally do. It was like obviously I'm going to just mention that like everybody else does but no not everybody else does and so it was...I asked if you had a couple of tips to share on text and you said your jump on here is absolutely brilliant

10:25 Andrew, you're a business coach. Do you want to just introduce yourself briefly? Yeah I'm a business coach. Okay that was brief! Also a bloody good one! I'm a business coach. I specialise in mentoring leaders, business leaders So, I'm a visiting lecturer at CAS, London School of Business. Big controversy over their name at the moment – don't ask me why but anyway…I do that and what else? I am ranked in the top 100 entrepreneur mentors in UK which is pretty amazing and on the Chairman for Children's Charity so I sort of devote myself between that and doing the childrens' charity stuff

11:06 Absolutely brilliant. Listen, I've brought you big now so we're all on the screen together! So it's always interesting when you got four people on the call but i'll host and manage this as best I can. The best way to start this is like why do people journal? What are they What are the benefits that people get out of it? I know from the research that I've done, people talk about mental health and you Dale and Moyra both mentioned about uncluttering your mind. But from your perspective... And we'll start Andrew's thing last in first up. We'll go around and you can share your perspectives each but what are some of the benefits that you find personally in journaling? First of all how long have you journaled for?

11:51 I started journaling in 1976. So, it was at university and I found out that I had a lot on and it started as to-do lists right? And then, that graduated into goal lists. So I was writing down my goals and stuff like that and then I got pretty annoyed because some of the goals weren't handling coming up mainly about girlfriends you know stuff like that it just wasn't gelling and I was sort of why isn't this working for me right so um so i started journaling in that uh that time frame and then I found firstly uh I didn't have to hold a lot of stuff in my head I could get it out there and just put it in the journal and just not even worry about

12:31 And then I just got addicted to it. So these are, oh look at this! Look at this! Just some of the ones... Big journals! Some of the ones that I've got but when I came to UK I had boxes and boxes and boxes and I spent six months scanning them all right so going back to 1975 so they're all scanned and so they're all electronic right? And so, these are probably some there. So if I need it and then I went through and did an archive. So if I'm looking for something like my mom's fruitcake recipe right? I can just type that in and it'll go find it for me which is just phenomenal but- That is phenomenal yeah! Yeah but the thing is because I was involved with business for example you know like look at this.

13:26 I was having a bad day there, look. Frank is gone right? Yeah. But yeah and things like if i'm trying to figure stuff out I do a lot of diagrams loads of stuff like that so i'm figuring stuff out in my head and almost like road testing it but the thing I discovered was as distinct from a diary...I then decided to be super honest Which is one reason I started scanning because this is just me working stuff out. It would be, I'd be mortified if anybody read any of these journals now so I went through them and like everybody in life you've had some ups and downs. I've had some pretty painful experiences in life

14:09 And it was just a way to work through that, right? So things like I got better and better at my writing so I started...I found that I could journal better if I went in columns like this rather than trying to go across the page. I started journaling in galleys. It's a lot easier for me to find stuff and not letting you read it Dale Look at Dale, I don't believe that. Take your screenshots! Yeah yeah look there's everything in there i just put all sorts of stuff in here but and then I found stuff like when you came on then you mentioned spirit look the first universal spiritual passbook

14:54 Bank account, right? I was on this spiritual journey to our most valued customer Andrew Priestley. A thousand percent unresponsible bonus club and a new river of lifeboat no judgment crashed. It was all this sort of stuff and you know what I wanted to have a lot of fun so started introducing a lot of color to it and experimented with that And look at this, I did a psych degree and one of the things was we had to go in do stuff in an internship in a rehab clinic. And I thought it's just going there to observe and they were having none of that so – and I found pretty quickly that you know there was a lot of stuff that came up for me like anxiety

15:44 My dad was in World War II and I have a name for what it was now. It's probably post-traumatic stress syndrome, so as a kid growing up with hypervigilant... So stuff like compassion And this one here, I was trying to journal what qualities do I like. So it's just wonderful but the other thing that I wanted to add here is that what absolutely throws me is when looking at a journal from say 1985 for example and think, who was this young man?

16:28 So, you know you go back through there's a real treasure trove and I started journaling dreams just whatever it was. And then what was that woman that did the artist way? Julia Cameron Yeah so her 12 week thing and you do the three day morning whatever it was but you know its just like I could go through loads of these and they look at change size and shape I found things like, where are we here? It looks like I've shanghaied the conversation doesn't it. No no it's perfect because in so many ways this is going to throw us into different areas of conversation and we can double back and actually pull on how that came to be

17:14 Yeah, so I was trying to work through here as a big dip in my life. You know? Big massive dip and then I got into systems development so I started unpacking my life in terms of the system thing and looking at that you know... And do you think Andrew that was.. As you were taking on board knowledge and skills and experience that was evolving your journaling it's almost helped you process the knowledge you were acquiring I think you nailed it. That's well spotted, Jonnie because that is exactly what happened there but like I was working through a lot of stuff and it was working through information, working through my own stuff more importantly for me the most valuable thing was working through a lot of painful stuff

17:57 Yeah, as well as good stuff. As well you know like I journal good stuff that's happened like You know my grandson's third birthday great a lot of lovely stuffs there and I look at I can go back and read journal entries I had about my kids when they were three and And I think ah forgot all about that Wow. You know, I hid my son's bike in a shed and lost the key! Bad father. Do you know straight away it makes me think about that adage or that expression when was the best time to plant an oak tree, like 25 years ago. When's the second best time today? So if anybody is hearing this and I'm thinking oh my gosh all that stuff has gone well okay fair enough i could try and recount some of it but clearly the best time to start is tonight or tomorrow morning yeah Well you know Jonnie

18:51 I was interested one time in what I actually could remember. So, I got a book and put a page for each year or couple of pages for each year right from when I was born right through and then said okay today I'm just going to see if I can remember anything from when I was one either what somebody told me about me at one or what I could remember obviously my earliest memory is that my mum had passed out on the floor it was in Australia it was a heat wave and my mum had passed out and I am in this high chair Why won't anyone notice me, Dale? Anyway. Several years later still got that dilemma. The unanswerable question. But it's amazing if you just do that exercise and just start with the years that you've gotten and you'll be surprised at what happens. And when I talk to my sister or brother who – I chat with my brother and sister every day and we just have a bit of laugh

19:43 And, of course, there's a lot more to it than that. When did she give it to you? 1991. She gave it to me because that's where I found it, 1991 so that was in there. Yeah. It is a delight. Do I spend a lot of time on it? No, I just put stuff in some mornings. So I write a little bit but I try and do a little bit each day and just capture notes and stuff like that but its fascinating looking back the scanning thing for It was important because so many things I journal were around business and a lot of lessons around stuff that I went through.

20:25 And I thought, I've got to capture this while I remember it. It's almost like a case study thing so somebody was asking about a dilemma... There is a real dilemma we've got right now you know there is a dilemma that here and this is not the time to get too political but you know the Charities Commission ...I have to be incredibly transparent with what I'm doing with the Charities Commission okay? So you can't run foul of the Charities Commission And I learned this years and years ago around things like governance, because I was working with high-end life on limb scenarios. I was working with civil aviation and with the government, military all that sort of stuff. One of the things I learned is about doing due diligence

21:07 And before you jump on the boat with anything, before you just jump on a bandwagon and get all emotionally caught up in the speed. We've got a couple of things happening in the last two years particularly one that's very fresh at the moment which everybody is jumping on and to me it's – I'm getting the sense that I should be on it and that to me because I've learnt by reading my journals I know that. It's a red flag to say slow down, do your due diligence before we just jump on this So, we're just going to go give it time and that was something I learned from many examples because I journal those things. Well wisdom the power of wisdom is one thing but being able to actually utilize that wisdom is another thing yeah. What journaling taught me mate don't make big decisions after nine o'clock or before 9 in the morning. I make terrible decisions after nine o'clock

21:57 So, there you go. But loads of journals different shapes different sizes is there a sort of thing no I chose journals that I could lay on a flatbed scanner yeah right so these ones they look nice but i can't scan them without having shadows everywhere and it was important to me know catch stuff like that um you know uh little ones The Jonnie Jensen Show, Jonnie Jensen, Team Super Dad, Moyra Mackie, Dale Darley, Andrew Priestley, It's not the diary, that's what gives it flavour. You know? It's like a cookbook I love cooking That's what makes life interesting Wow! That's amazing Andrew Thank you What an introduction Blimey, i'm blown away Dale and Moyra are like... Now what do we say? I'm looking at you guys at home now Get a journal okay Are you journaling

23:00 That's so brilliant though that you've laid out all the different ways that journals can be because I think that's one of the barriers people have. It was important for me, Moyra because There were things that happened and I thought, did I imagine that? Or did it actually happen. So a lot of my journals haven't always been happy things to think but I needed the way to process through them you know. I need to work it through. A lot of business stuff but a lot of personal stuff as well so yeah. Well memory is an unreliable thing anyways. You probably realise when you talk to your siblings everybody's got a different view of what happened at that Christmas dinner right!

24:09 But here's the question, should they be black journals like mine or should they be coloured? What do you think? Well I think we should have a selection. I think you should write depending on... Oh look! I approve of orange it's my corporate colour. You guys are really lucky that you can go and buy beautiful stationery when i lived in the UK talk about stationary porn I'd go anywhere and it would be like, oh my God journals, journals. Oh my god! Look at that one! That's so beautiful! I live in Spain... Lidl? You can have A or B

24:53 But if you're watching this, you've got to send Dale a journal. Oh god and I want pens and other pretty things please! The value of the value of... there we go it's all Andrews journaling stuff. I'm looking forward to my presents. Yeah the pins are awesome people shouldn't get stuck on what they're going to write, they shouldn't get stuck on what they're going to write it in. They shouldn't get stuck on how much they're gonna write or how long it's gonna take. You've basically covered an hour's worth of conversation in 10 minutes Andrew! But it is perfect to be able to dig into it because I was really wanting to get across in this session you know why people journal? The benefits of doing it and what they get out of it and then get stuck into some of the hows

25:49 Dale, in your work with people it sounds like obviously we've got Moyra here who's perhaps a bit more business focused and you're a bit more of the creative sort of pulling out your life experiences and stuff. Where If people are uncomfortable about starting journaling, what should they do to get past that? Or if they say I'm not really a writer. It doesn't come out of my hand well... How do you approach people who feel like that's a struggle for them? Well, what I like to do is try and get people to find an environment that they feel comfortable in. So, I do write in bed but when I look at the environment that I'm in it's cosy, it's comfortable

26:35 So if I pick cozy, comfortable silence up and take it to the downstairs lounge. It's cozy comfortable and so for me it is about environment so for some people I find it shocking that they could possibly write in a cafe with loud music but you have to find the right place for you. The right environment that feels good. For me that's the first thing is the right environment And then look at journaling in lots of different ways When I first came to Spain I pretty much was in a mess and one of the things i did, I don't think we had Facebook lives back then. So one of the things I did every single day is when you've got a new leader you talk about their first hundred days or something so I said right my first 101 days of being here I'm going to talk into my phone and I went out everyday it was

27:31 It was hard. I can remember going on holiday with my mum and taking my dogs to the top of a hill There's something wild going on outside. I can remember this one day, I'd left my mum and taken the dogs for a really early morning walk and I broke my heart about something that was going on so for 101 days I talked into a mobile phone And then I listened back and then I wrote in my journal. So for me, it's you've got to find the right environment and then the right medium so it might be if I take my mum as an example

28:14 In the early 60s, I bought her a journal and pen and a book on how to write a novel. I don't know what happened to the journal but she's now subsequently written eight books so her method of journaling was to write novels based on her life And what is really super fascinating right now... She was 82 last week And she said, oh I hadn't bought her any books on her Kindle. So she went and found this book that she had written when she was 65 and it was full of angst and pain and just the whole crap with her life like my...I mean I adore my dad because a womanizer, alcoholic you know

28:57 Not the kind of man you want to be married to. I'm liking him already! You are? He was great, he was a great friend my dad but yeah, he's bit of boy. Best friend. Clearly if your mum wrote a book about him then... She had all this stuff in her book and she said because there was nothing on her Kindle she took this book down and she was massively embarrassed about the anger, pain, angst and whatever And what's happened recently is that she and I have been having conversations about what's in her book. And it's quite fascinating,

29:36 Moyra's my life because she lived in a conflicted environment. And I was like, yeah mum so did I! So coming back to answering your question it's finding the right environment and the right medium and it's not getting hung up on rules. I go to bed every night and I pick up a journal and I might write a word or sentence, I might write reams I do things like, I have...I use Oracle cards for prompts. I've written tiny little books that have got journaling prompts in You just gotta find the right way that's for you and something that I find that holds people back Andrew, I'm in awe of you! Like you've got 600 years full of stuff at all indexed and cross-indexed

30:23 When I left the UK, I got all of my journals and I burnt them. So one of the things that people find out about me is that I'm a journalist. It's massively cathartic and what I do now, it doesn't really matter about these journals because what i do now is on a full moon. I will burn...I'll flick through and if there's anything that's like a business idea or something that's worth keeping I'll keep but I send my angst to the universe because I don't want to read it! Yeah. I have kept my spine fractured a couple of years ago.

31:03 They are to remind me of how strong I was, how resilient I was. How I managed to heal myself but everything else... burn them! But you know what's powerful about it? We've got the opposites here haven't we?! Yeah exactly and that's what so powerful about it is that The value, I asked the question of Andrew like what's the benefit of you for journaling. We learned so much about how Andrew has processed his knowledge, his life experiences and it's an access to making decisions now in the present. Dale you contrasted that beautifully with this is about expression and tuning into yourself

31:42 The power in that is in letting it go and passing on to the universe through burning them. And what's important there, is that the benefit is clear and evident to you both, and you're able to access it through journaling even though they are so different. You can't say that Jonnie no! It's wrong to burn! Don't you endorse Dale? Don't you let her off the hook Jonnie, That's just not on, that's just not right This comment has not been endorsed by Andrew Priestley. I have a ritual! Jim, do you know years and years ago...I tell you the question was really good one how did i get into it? I also had role model to me a guy called John Drewes who's a really famous Australian artist when I went down he had a country property

32:29 And he actually bought an old boat shed when the river went up and flooded everything. They got rid of the boat sheds, and he bought one, and he turned that into his art studio but one part is A, you never let anyone in there right? But he let me in because we were both illustrators and did drawings and stuff like that And he had the most amazing library of visual diaries going back from when he was a child. Much like Moyra, your bookcase behind you there was just... You look at it and I just... It was richness that I could not... You pull any book so it wasn't words but it was drawings and illustrations that informed his paintings. I could understand why he kept it right?

33:11 But maybe you create in different ways but I found this, Monty Roberts. Do you know Monty Roberts the horse guy? The Horse Whisperer. Have you heard of the Horse Whisperer or Monty Roberts right? So Monty Roberts...I caught up with Monty and I was asking him stuff and blah blah blah and he gave me a whole thing about horses and apparently we're very much like horses right? He was talking about how some of us are horses arse's But he was talking about that, but the thing about moving a horse in circles and stuff like that got me thinking about circles and about stages and cycles in life. And it's a funny thing I developed an idea around the difference we know we talk about inner child for example so I did a lot of inner child stuff right? And then I was getting nowhere with it then I realized actually we've gotten into grown-up

34:08 Which doesn't come out much, right? Because we're talking about the adult but you and I we all know adults who they're just kids masquerading as... You know, the chronology doesn't tell me whether they are grown up or not. It just tells me that reached an adulting technically And I really wanted to play with that but it's funny how you get two different things then they come together That was a And you had access to that because you journaled it. I couldn't get rid of journals like that, because I go wow! Because I look at that still and its got an energy to it that shapes and informs what I do with vulnerable children today. Yeah. I do keep some stuff that I get downloads like that. I tear them out. She's backsliding now. Everything else is just for the videos. Just to make you feel better Andrew

34:55 I keep my stuff but it's, but i don't scan it so there's a big off here there's a big cupboard that is just full of I would say shit but actually it's valuable treasure Andrew. Moyra when you're working with in businesses right and you get resistance to this subject how How do you address that? You know, especially... you're talking to business leaders who probably think they know it all anyway. And plus your coaching some people down the chain as well inside of teams so actually there's quite a lot of value that everybody could have from this journaling and their individual roles, the team, the leadership when you hit resistance and interestingly I'm guessing from them from the responses i've had with do women find it easier to journal than men

35:48 Well, answer that inside the question. I mean you've made a whole set of assumptions and you did it right at the beginning as well. You said today, Dale, you deal with the inner stuff and Moyra, you deal with the business stuff. That's the biggest problem. You are a whole person. You don't leave a bit of you at home when you go to work or at least not anymore And the point is, well we never have but people have tried to and that tension has pulled people apart. But also meant that work... People bring their patterns of relating to work in fact we bring our family of origin to work and the way we fit in so when I talk to leaders I talked about attachment theory So how do you happen about how they fitted with it? How did they get attention

36:38 What would they recognise for? Stories come out like the high chair story, that you're the centre of your universe as a child. You'll take it that your mum's not taking any attention from you. Poor you when something has probably happened to her! So the stories we tell ourselves and so working with senior leaders is about What's the story they're telling themselves and what stuff do they need to let go of in order to be more collaborative, to be more compassionate? Especially for men. They may have grown up with parents who grew up in the war for example and there is something traumatised about

37:17 Parenting model there. And then they bring that to work and they become slightly sort of neglectful, and they close their doors and they don't give feedback and they believe in things called tough love. I'll go on and say no there's only love! If it's tough, it's something else but it's not love. So I'm actually called as the Love Lady because I talk about love at work a lot and so it is about feelings if somebody's resistant to that...I love it! I love watching people get a little bit uncomfortable because then I'll say to them are you uncomfortable? And they'll want to talk about other things maybe but actually I find men really really just want

38:00 So in my coaching, men are much more likely to cry much quicker than women. Just non-scientific! But still that might freak some people out in here, they're listening and they go I thought this was gonna be about journaling and now you trying to get me crying. So there's access to doing that there's an access to knowing themselves better and being a better leader and then journaling is an access too, it's a vehicle for getting there. Yeah my definition of journalling is putting emotions on paper So it's different for everyone, but essentially we always come back to who we are. And so the other thing I compare it to is mindfulness and so I think it's a version of mindfulness and the purpose of mindfulness is not just sit on the mat

38:46 The purpose of mindfulness is to allow us to be more resilient and more responsive, and more aware in the moment of what's going on for us. And that's the same with journaling it's not...the act of writing this stuff it's not the point! It's what..it's the process and what accrues after it like Andrew you've got 20 30 40 years There's a richness to it, Moyra. Yes! There is a real richness to it Yeah that's what and I think that's so that's why I've called my book Journal Safari because it's a journey and then it's about revisiting it and looking back at it and making different meaning from from it but your feelings are always there That's how our brain works we feel first when we think second So if you think

39:40 It's what your emotions doing underneath it. I do enjoy writing, right? I've always written quite well and if i'm going to write to someone or if I've got something heartfelt to write then I will make sure I always write it with a pen rather than type it because actually my feelings and emotions and thoughts come out more fluidly through a pen that they do through typing. And so I can recognize that in myself there's My true being, my true feelings, my true words in actually writing those letters rather than typing. I'd probably add on what you were saying Jonnie and what Moyra was just saying there's a bit of a disconnect if your typing journaling. I've never been a fan of typing because as that... You're putting one extra piece in there, you know there's.. You can look at the energy that comes out of your handwriting for start-up. And it uses a different part of your brain so typing goes into your automatic memory

40:41 So you can type just like, you know when you drive. It's possible to drive a few miles and not even remember where you've been or how you got there. Especially if you live in the same bloody town that I grew up in! It's now an automatic memory. I'm a touch typist so I can type without really thinking But handwriting still requires something else. And then there's the energy and there's the mark making and the scribbling, and the doodling I mean my... These are what I work with when I go to teams they all get a box of these because it is in a child yeah crayons it's in a child right? So it's about letting go this idea that has to be sophisticated and that has to be careful

41:29 My role is to get people much more comfortable with what's underneath and therefore it's about letting go and being playful, experimenting. And then all the stuff that comes out underneath because there are layers. What's underneath is really interesting. Rich, Andrew I like that one. I agree with you about the leadership piece because I work with leaders as well Unfortunately, I do use a bit of tough love because I have some guys and say the only one thing you can do is journal it. Oh no! I said I'm not asking you that's what you're going to be doing. You're gonna be journaling right? And they go oh no no no... And if we are going to talk about this, if we are going to have an argument over this then I am not charging enough right so if I say do it then that's what it is right? It's sort of like a western seater but I just say real men journal

42:25 Well, you're from the southern hemisphere like I am so...I just say I'm being very Zimbabwean right now and when I say... Are you from South Africa? I'm from Zimbabwe. I'm from Zimbabwe yeah. Oh wow! Yeah. So I just go... Ja bro, ja Moyra, ja Yeah, just wait till I have a couple of red wines and then the accent will come back. Well listen guys i'm a good example of this right because I've started to journal, I've started to journal written, I've started to journal in Evernote, um...I've stopped, I've started you know and I have a coach now we speak and you know and have worked together for

43:07 I've got a question for Dale. Can i ask you a question of Dale? Yeah, go for it. You said something that just gave me the heebie-jeebies right burning diaries because because I have this dilemma and Moyra maybe you can help me too right because I've got all these diaries which are scanned and stuff like that Part of me, I don't want to let go because it's a big part of my history right but I also think you know John Drew said to me that the National Gallery in Australia, the National Art Gallery in Canberra they knew that he did visual diaries and they wanted to requisition them as a bequest right. To have an artist with a living

43:58 End to end journal from right when he started his career, right through his career which is such a rarity to see somebody. What they would do them or God only knows but I don't know what anyone would be doing but I think, oh well I want my kids reading that sort of stuff and so there's that real pull. What will I do Dale? Do you say once I'm gone that's more requests that they get Shredded or do you scan them and put a passcode on them spend the next 40 years trying to figure out the password to get into them? Or what, what do you do? So if I were you and I had kept and collated all of those things, what I feel is that if someone finds my journal and they read something they don't like then that's tough on them. And so in your case, I would bequeath your journals to your kids and say fill your boots kids and let them... You're dead!

44:53 I mean, you know your spirit is still hanging around and you can in their ears and whatever while they're doing it. If it were me and I had written all that stuff, I'd just let them have it because when you're dead what do you care? And you know what an honour... When I think about my mum's books, I've read a few bits of things But I know that when she goes, I've got part of my mum to read in that stuff. And I would hate her... you know although she's turned them into novels and we've discussed them at length That is such a beautiful legacy for me. I don't have kids, you know? I don't have anyone in my life but my dogs they can't read so if I were you and I'm not...I would hand them over! On the thing of someone reading them when i was in um my last relationship before I came to Spain

45:52 I remember this one day, he'd done something really horrid to me and at that time I kept my journals. And I got out this journal and went... ...I've asked for all of these things from the universe for the right man! I said look what you have! He just went be careful what you wish for. At that point I remember thinking do you know what? It was a unawful relationship. If you read what i've written about you tough luck So I would bequeath to your kids and let them enjoy the richness of knowing you at a deeper, different level. My mum used to journal right? And she had journals for each year and I was asking my brother...I said have you got mum's journals yeah yeah yeah...I said because we want to know what did you write when i was born that sort of stuff anyway he said oh I've got all the journals but the year you were born is missing

46:50 And I'll keep hearing it. He said, well mum didn't want you to know that you're adopted. Oh! As a trick or... It was just true? Is he pranking you?! No, no. He's changed. We just didn't want you to know we took that. We just didn't want you know your adopted right there but the thing was the most amazing thing was like this is what you're saying Dale is really good point. Mum was up in Crewe during the Second World War And she was seconded, she was a hairdresser and she was seconded at the age of 16 to go work for the Rolls-Royce factory which they converted into an aircraft engine factory. For the Second World War. One night she was there and they said look it's early you can go home nothing happened or your not on that night something like what she wrote about. That was the night it got bombed so you sort of read this journal about

47:52 And I mean, how weird is that? But that i think it's a marvelous thing about keeping a journal. That you tap into things like that which was fascinating to read about my mother's life and she had Alzheimer so we used to tell her stories from the journals and stuff like that which she never remembered but if I sung them to her... She got it! Wow! That's really beautiful

48:35 I was gonna say as well that one of the things is to think about some of them, maybe some of them you give when you are still here. And then the other idea I had, because this is just the way I think. Some of those cool diagrams you can make them into wallpaper and wallpaper the loom but it's like put them out there! You know what i mean? It's like some of your stuff's really in...I think people keep stuff in books a bit too much if there's something interesting there how could you put it on display or do something so that That's important to me right now or whatever. So I just thought about a blue wallpaper full of all of those diagrams and everything would be super cool! Other people's interpretations of things can elevate and take it to the next level, so there are so many interesting thoughts

49:22 And I think inside of businesses, not to suddenly get too seriously about it again but inside of businesses that process of looking at different experiences and different interpretation situations could be really useful as a team grows and expands or in basic terms. We were this event last summer how did they go? Or this event this summer and how'd they go? If things get too formalized like oh yeah write a post-event report and actually you'll say It went quite well. A hundred people turned up, but it won't be a journal like actually the emotion of the day and things like that I think what i'm taking a lot out of this from our in the business sense is

49:58 How much of the realness of a journal can be of value in helping people shape their team or their own life, or their family and certainly their future aspirations. I've seen in what you've shared Andrew literally because we've seen those pages that And knowing you a little as I do now, it occurs to me that part of your success at this point has come from those building blocks. To me, a lot my knowledge is just in my memory banks It isn't utilised like that into a journal and I think having spoken to other people about success strategies and things they do, this is... journalling is not something that the majority of people do. But when you talk to people that do it, it's one of their success, the cornerstones of their success. I've heard of his hang-up Jonnie because one of the most famous journalists of all time was Marcus Aurelius

50:58 Yes, which he was called meditations right so he's got some I've some people said He's like the originator of journaling and stuff that may just be it's good Good pros but can you just explain who is because its people weren't no Marcus Aurelius was a Roman Emperor Yeah So he used to journal and this isn't days when Dale You think you'll get tough trying to get a journal book right? They had to go on Egypt to get The Sometimes, the little things that she was talking about how she lost her dad's teacup or something like that which is you know and I know my grandfather and I know how much he loved his cup of tea. And so again there is a real warmth to those tiny observations and sometimes I felt when I'm journaling is also notice little things like when I sing to my grapes

52:04 And of course, there's a lot more to come. If anyone wants I've just shared a link to Marcus Aurelius Wikipedia page. Stoicism comes from Marcus Aurelius, slow it down because there's a tendency to consume I think it's really important that this is an action of slowing down.

53:00 kind of resting on something, and it's emergent Jonnie. Like you were saying about business it doesn't have to be output driven but something does emerge something maybe more valuable than what you thought was going to emerge and I think that's the value of it instead just going in a straight line we can go deeper and then emerge with something else that is just as valuable or more valuable Not get hung up on what your writing that day because actually juice will come out on Day 10 Even if they don't connect together, you couldn't have written what you wrote on day 10 without writing what you wrote from day 1 to 9. Can I just add something?

53:42 Scrappy bit of paper. And you can scan read it if you like, Andrew because I've actually made a video of it but something that I found really powerful this was a little letter to my heart so dear hearts and so I scribbled on this bit of paper The Jonnie Jensen Show, Jonnie Jensen, Team Super Dad, Moyra Mackie, Dale Darley, Andrew Priestley,

54:21 I think people need to hear it, but there's something about actually reading your own words out and listening back that actually helps you to process and find your voice. And it is something I've been doing in the last couple of months and it is so immensely powerful! I mean, I often read things to my mum like... It really really helps to get it out I'm going to be doing more of this writing stuff that is deeply personal. I wrote something the other day, What I've Never Liked About Me and it was...I never liked anything about me and it was all you know all the stuff there's only a little tiny piece about you know stuff that had happened but ended up with this massive journey to self-love and well actually I quite like me now! And I'm gonna record....I couldn't do it at the time because

55:18 But for people who want to hear what they've written, read it out. You don't have to do what I do and put it on YouTube or Facebook... No but you could record it on your phone and play it back like that yeah? Of course! Because of the work that I do, I want people to get really connected to their bits of stuff How could I expect someone else to write something that is so deep and that is really lifting the rubbish out of their body? So putting a voice to it, it's massively healing. Yeah! This...I tell you what this is a master class in journaling mate

56:03 It's an absolute pleasure to have you all on and we are heading towards the top of the hour which is where we generally like to keep these things. I know Moyra wants to say something, she's ready she's got a comment! Come on Moyra what were you thinking? No i was just listening! I was watching you looking at that and you're nodding, I know you had a comment there! Come on Moyra no pressure Earlier on you asked about how people get started. And one of the things that I do a lot is say to people, just get pen and paper and it's called free writing but essentially you take your pen, you take your paper and set your timer maybe for three minutes and write and keep writing even if you get stuck you go,

56:48 And the question that I asked on the journal challenge that I did on Facebook was, how are you feeling? Well what's going on for you now. How are you feeling? What are you thinking and every night they... That's how people started for three minutes and it's kind of like a clearing activity But if you're stuck, that's what I advise. I always say to people just get your pen and paper and answer a question like why am i finding this so hard? Could be the question or you know why am I so angry right now? What am I feeling? Um but just get your pen papers sets a timer for three minutes everyone's got three minutes

57:25 And most people go, oh my gosh something else emerges and then that frees you to do the other stuff. So they wrote for longer afterwards yeah? Oh yeah! Yeah but just try it Jonnie! I get that and having when I was doing stuff in Evernote I had like categories what did i learn today what was something with a challenge today basically they were my cues and if your creating a habit or something you haven't done before Those levers, those springboards that you can utilise just to get you started each evening until it becomes a more natural habit. Until you find the pen flowing there's nothing wrong with having what did I do today? What went well today? What was a challenge right? I don't want to say what went wrong today or be a bit more positive than that but... ...what was the challenge side that i enjoyed today and then maybe what is a question I couldn't answer today where actually

58:18 throwing that out there to your mind, to come up with a solution whilst you're asleep or whilst... because our subconscious mind can work on problems for us even while we are doing other things. I think that's an important element of journaling that perhaps we haven't touched on there is by digging into a subject our subconscious mind will work on it for us in the background I had a guy working with me at the moment, Jonnie who said oh no I'm not into this journaling stuff. And I said well I'm going to ask you and want you journal right? Oh this doesn't work. Have you ever journaled? He says No! We can have discussion about journalling can we unless you've tried it But then he just got hooked for that very reason. He started to put down some cool questions that he wanted to journal about, like you were saying and then suddenly that lifted the lid and then he said oh shoot I've missed out! I should have been doing this for so long and that's...I hear that from so many people. I wish i'd started this a lot lot sooner but any number of reasons

59:13 Yeah, awesome. Well listen guys this has been amazing and... No no we don't want to go now! We've got so much more to tell you! Get a glass of red wine let's sit here let's have a chat Jonnie, Jonnie don't leave! How can I do this on Monday when it is raining? Jonnies going to pull the pin on us Put it in your journal send it to me Listen, Moyra. As I say you started this call where we talked about the habit challenge and actually journaling is a good habit right? I'm encouraging journaling as a habit and i could have prattled on for eight minutes about why people should journal but it wouldn't have been anywhere near as much gold has come out of this and then I really love the idea

59:59 How do we contact Moyra and Dale? Let's do this then. Okay, starting from clockwise top of the screen Moyra thank you so much for being on board how can people work with you? Where can they find your stuff about your challenges and etc.? If you Google me, you'll find me. But Moyra Mackie – any version of my name will come up – moyramackie.com and Therese she knows me too. She's just made a comment so yeah you can work with me in a group, you can work individually I'm just about to do a journal safari guided safari with journaling so look at the website check it out. Yeah it's a safari! It's a journey into the unknown you know what you kind of mean? Journal Safari Moyra

1:00:57 So yeah, just Google me. You'll find me I'm all over the place LinkedIn, Facebook. Are you on LinkedIn? Yeah of course I am on LinkedIin yes! Yeah, yeah LinkedIn, Facebook not so keen on Twitter and um... How do we find Dale? How do we find you Dale? daledarley.com, Facebook i'm on Linkedin Well, I'll come and find you. I think you're more famous than me! Dale your website is crammed full of awesome resources and different writing programs so from creative writing to that inner soul work to writing your own non-fiction coaching type book or you've got courses for all those things so that's awesome thank you

1:01:43 And Mr. Priestley, great to have you on board LinkedIn. Where do they find you Jonnie? Well they find me at TeamSuperDad.com and we're And we're on the Habit Challenge at the moment. So that's teamsuperdad.com forward slash habit challenge, the F5 program for dads who are busy dads who want to create their best life ever. The F5 is launching in later in August so we look forward to bringing on the latest cohorts to that program and I am going to have to start journaling now. So I have three accountability coaches who are gonna say to me next time they see me where's the journal Mr Jensen? And I have to be able to say here it is

1:02:29 This has been very powerful. You two at home, get a journal and start journaling we're watching you! Not just any journal it's got to be... write them and burn them. It's gotta be scannable, burnable good and share-able Moyra that's one you were clear to get across as well. Jonnie how cool are you mate? You've just got the besties hanging out with you right on this journal thing you just picked the talent hey? I learn, well I said to you at Moyra today didn't i? The teacher needs to always be learning. Part of my motivation for Team Super Dad was came from me asking myself the question how am I going to fix this? How am I gonna achieve what I want in life

1:03:16 And I share this in my story all over the place, but I was up a mountain in Austria and there was a blizzard and we were crossing a crevasse. And I was in my divorce and it was all crappy! And I was like, I've got to fix this. And then boom Team Super Dad. I've got the piece of paper that I wrote upon that mountain is in front of me here so... That's the blueprint of Team Super Dad. Slush board Jonnie, just sloshed the word. Yeah well we got to the mountain hut and we sort of broke the door in and this lady was there I said oh i need a piece of paper! That's the biggest piece of paper she had which is kind of perfect because it just screams Austrian mountain hut yeah Austrian Mountain Hut

1:04:05 Great. Well, thank you guys. I really appreciate your time and we'll see you next time. Thanks Jonnie! Team Super Dad out. Bye. This has been Team Super Dad find us at teamsuperdad.com