Making Quality Time For Yourself Is Vital For Feeling Fulfilled

00:02 Welcome to the Team Super Dad podcast. Making quality time for yourself is the final part of the power code. Let's roll. Welcome to Team Super Dad. Real dads creating their best lives ever. More time, more money, more fun. You are not alone. You're on Team Super Dad. Hey, Johnny here. Welcome to the Team Super Dad podcast. Great to have you here. As always, if you're on the live, then you can comment and tune in and join us.

00:43 And if you're watching the replay, give us a hashtag replay. And of course to the podcast listeners, wherever you are, enjoy the next 20 to 25 minutes together. Please share, share this around. Whether you're listening or watching, share this with other dads you know. Team Super Dad is my community of modern men. I'm a dad coach, a performance coach. And we're here creating the life we desire and leaving behind that life we feel stuck in. Living with power, being the man that we want to be. So if you're, where are you in the world?

01:22 Let me know that. What you're up to. It is first thing here, as always, kicking off the weekend, recording this as I do. Today is my dad's 80th birthday, which is going to be pretty cool. The whole family are coming together down in near Brighton, going for a pretty cool meal. We're going to be doing, we're doing some, we're doing, dad likes his poems, right? So my guys, Team Jensen, we're going to be doing, I didn't realize that Philip Larkin's poem, the one, you know, they fuck you up, your mum and dad, it's called This is the Verse. So we're going to be doing that. Read out second to last episode of Ted Lasso.

02:05 They dropped that one in there. It was the woman who runs the bar. What's she called? Peggy? Peggy, yeah. Peggy, the woman who runs the pub in Ted Lasso. She dropped in Philip Larkin's famous poem. Absolute cracker. If you don't know that one, go and remind yourself, familiarize yourself with this is the verse. We are here in the risk of time stamping this. It's actually June. And we've been going through from the beginning of this year. Actually missed a couple of weeks, which was not the plan. That was like my challenge I set for myself.

02:44 But like all challenges, it's about getting back up and finishing the job. So we've gone all the way through the power code method, my program, my method for modern living for men in the world today, us family guys. We're hitting our 40s, midlife. What is it all about? Like, where do we find our joy? Where do we find our motivation and drive to stay connected to the people we love most, to stay on mission, and to not just feel great, but actually operate from greatness. This final part, it's the third part of reward, which is the top of the pyramid, okay? After purpose and ownership, do the work, engage and reward.

03:28 We've spoken about the importance of adventure and getting out of your comfort zone, creating a bucket list, taking time to celebrate the end of each day, the end of each week, the month, like literally what have we achieved and noticing that because the habit can so often be, what haven't I done? What comes next? What have we got to do? It's like if you're not having enough fun, then what is the whole point? Referencing my dad today through the good times and the bad, through mansions and

04:06 derelict pubs and everything else in between. There was always and has always been, and today will be no exception, fun and friends and experiences and literally making the most of every situation. So in the, and if you're interested in taking part of the power code, we are running the next intake in July. So get yourself over to teamsuperdad.com forward slash power and pre-register yourself onto the power code program. We'll chat. You tell me about what you're trying to create, what the challenges are. We'll let you know a little bit about how some of the power code principles can help you in that.

04:48 So even if you don't join, it will become a valuable call for you to take away and implement some of the suggested actions into your life. And hopefully as well, get you signed up. making quality time for yourself i did a little uh i did a little youtube search just in case people weren't sure if this was a popular topic or not okay um jay shetty's 299 000 um a ted talk by jen oliver how to love yourself to the core 2.4 million views uh there's just there's there's a lot tom belliou 7 000 views um

05:32 uh who's that neuroscience guy it's not someone's remixed his video but anyway the big dude who does the three hour long podcast um 5.3 million views neuroscience making your life exciting again 912 000 views like the importance of taking time for yourself 76 000 views this is a topic this is a topic that people search about so but it's like we're here with dads right we're talking about this in a in a very practical and manly uh uh way making time for yourself is as simple as noticing where you're at and what you're doing there's there's an expression i love wherever i go there i am it's a it's a

06:21 a level of self-awareness that most of us don't have we're just rushing around busy we're busy doing we're busy succeeding we're making deals we're we're sorting out problems we're we're we're picking up the kids we're we're running on to the next thing but there is always a moment where you can notice yourself being you being the person in the car driving along what you're thinking where you're how much you're concentrating what you're listening to it's almost like a matrix moment like where you step back and look down upon yourself but as as you do that you become so much more aware of of all parts of of where you're at and

07:00 what and what you're doing like i said how you're feeling where you're going what you're listening to what you're thinking and that's where you start to have a greater sense of of purpose and control over everything and in this part of reward that making time for yourself is it can be a practice as simple as driving along but what i'm talking about is actually setting time aside in um i can't get my phones upstairs um i'll share a book what's it called it's like called success principles or something but um the the two authors um went and interviewed lots of um ceos

07:45 actors successful sports stars and coaches to to create a uh an outline of what the common strategies for success and high performance uh are and this this making time for yourself piece was was core to that because it's it's like a like a like a computer cleaning itself have you ever do a defrag on your computer uh it's literally like that you're defragging yourself so when and i watched an interesting video the other week uh of mel robbins i read her book uh the five second rule uh years ago and she's just gone on to be flipping

08:30 she's wildly successful now talking really much the same all about habits and and success principles but high fiving yourself literally she talks about it as the practice of of high five in the mirror which which okay you can take a version of that or you can literally do it but it was born out of a science where they ran a process with children and they gave them they gave one set um acknowledgements like words of affirmation uh for completing a task they gave another set almost no acknowledgement for completing the task and they gave the third set just a straight up good old-fashioned high five and the the the the positive

09:18 response the the results from the test were that the children that got the high five um reacted both externally and internally far more favorably to the high five than they did any of the words or lack of words so in calling this section um high five in yourself that's literally what we're doing okay so making time for yourself first of all scheduling it so it becomes part of a habit you know tony robbins talks about the hour of power and your and how you run your morning rituals we talked all about morning routines inside of do the work the w in in the power code but making time

09:58 for yourself as you do this you know looking at your morning routine how what's your breakfast like what's your coffee like what's the time you sit down and and do some journaling like if it's rush rush rush then the task you're doing is rushing there isn't really a process of of um of mindfulness of making a moment for yourself sit down and actually enjoy that coffee or better still do it somewhere outside can you know people that have dogs are naturally out walking the dog but still there's a difference between people who are walking the dog looking at their phone and being super busy and people who are walking the dog and

10:40 taking in all that is around them the sounds the smells the the time of the year the temperature the the the sun coming up or the the mystery of the darkness in the winter this is all taking that you know that moment for yourself rather than engaging in phone and email and things that you should be doing that day many of the other elements of of of um making time for yourself are scattered throughout the power code so adventure and novelty getting outside of your comfort zone we just talked about it gratitude goes back to uh purpose at the top and and being conscious of of all that you've achieved and what

11:25 you've created self-appreciation rituals they're also part of do the work but as you sit as you find this time for yourself it being the top of the triangle of reward you're really reflecting on all that you've created if it's a project who was involved what were the lessons learned what were the moments of triumph what were the challenges um as you you know these these are headers actually i've got in a in an exercise that that form part of this if you comment um if you comment journal in anything that you're watching or send me uh send me a dm i'll send you this this

12:10 um this high five yourself this make time for yourself uh journaling template i'll send it over to you but it's whether you're writing it down or whether you're consciously going through this process it is the essential peak of the power code of your day it will give you a chance to reset and move back to the start of the process looking at what comes next looking at where you need to move towards and then what you need to do to achieve that it is the essence of fulfillment which if you've been tuned in for all of these episodes you'll know fulfillment is having a clear intention like a clear vision of where you're headed and carrying out tasks to actively pursue that that is where you find joy and fulfillment in all of in all that you do and it's also why so many of us feel lost because we're not

13:04 we're either not clear about where we're headed so every task is flipping pointless or it seems pointless or we're clear about where we wanted to end up but we know we're not working towards getting there that is why so many men feel lost in the world today so a slightly more advanced let's call it a step up from that and i would encourage you to do this on a semi-regular basis so you're going to do the practical um high five yourself on a day-to-day week to week basis but i also want to encourage you to make time in your schedule to take yourself away for either a day or for a weekend

13:47 to really separate yourself from the noise and the routine of the family and of your work and put yourself in an environment where you can do this consciously over an extended period of time it will naturally lead into a planning session which like i said going back to the top of the power code your purpose and vision where you're headed but it's it's like a segue a bridge so when you've done this kind of grounding exercise to tune in to who you are and what you've done and who's involved what you've learned from it what were the challenges what comes next that is

14:27 an exploration and taking yourself to somewhere new is the most powerful way to open your mind and tap into that and don't do it necessarily as this practice don't keep it all to yourself the the value of sharing this with other people who are on the same mission mission or other like-minded men, like the men inside of Team Superdad and the Power Code, with your mentors and with your loved ones, giving them the opportunity to connect with you around this not only reinforces what you're up to, but it will strengthen your bond with those people.

15:09 And there'll be dads listening to this, I dare say, who... Well, if you've listened to this many of the Team Super Dad episodes, then I'm already pretty confident that you're tuned into exactly what we're talking about, what we're up to. But if you're still doubtful that this is a bit like, well, I'm really going to sit and talk to myself. Am I really going to work? What's the point of that? It's a springboard for you. It's not about it being weird or being any less manly. It's about connecting with yourself and about showing up through the tough times and through the good times as the person who you know yourself to be, not some version you're always looking for or questioning.

15:56 It's a grounding exercise, grounding in a way that will take you forward onto the next chapter. Because ultimately, that's what everything's about. It is about that next chapter. So today, as my dad enters his 80th year, we're into a new chapter. I remember his 40th birthday. So when things like that come up, you're like, oh my gosh, 40 years have passed. But what am I now? 49? So I was clearly, I was nine years old at my dad's 40th birthday. How long till I'm 80? Well, 31 years. So in a way, there's almost, you know, I've still got like double the amount of life to go.

16:41 When I look at what my dad achieved between the years of 40 and 80, there's been about three different businesses, three different locations where he's lived, four different relationships at least, the ones that I know of. You know, so wherever you feel like you're at today, you're pretty much halfway. There's so much more to come. And everything that we've talked about in this Power Code series, I'm going to have to come up with a new plan for the next six months of podcast episodes.

17:22 But wherever you feel you're at, if you're in the sweet spot of Team Superdad audience, then you're halfway through. You're halfway through this journey. Everything that you've created up until this point, you've got the chance to go and do it all again. And whether that's something new or whether it's taking what you've done to the next level, the practices and processes of the power code are a core model for living of creating a life by design that will have you be connected to yourself, to your family, and to the people that are most important to you around you.

18:02 That's the person who you want to be. That's the person you want to show up as. And that's the reason why so many men are lost today because they just don't have the answers to those points. So I hope this has been a value. Ask any questions you've got in the comments below. Send them to me on DMs if you think it's a bit personal and get yourself over to the Team Superdad group. As always, that's teamsuperdad.com forward slash group. And if you want to connect with me and talk about everything that you could get out of the power code or one-on-one coaching, then just simply go to teamsuperdad.com forward slash 15 call and we will get on that initial conversation and call.

18:44 Absolutely awesome to have you here. If it's sunny where you are in the world, then get out there and enjoy it. If it's winter, if you're down under, then just enjoy the winter. I bloody hate winter. I bloody love summer though. So let's get out there and top up our town and have some laughs today. Team Super Dad out. I'll see you next time. This has been Team Super Dad. Find us at teamsuperdad.com. Join the program and create the best life ever for you and your children. You are not alone. You're on Team Super Dad.