Winners Win - Creating A Winning Mindset

00:04 Welcome, good morning. In this week's episode of the Team Super Dad podcast, winners win. It's a mindset. It's a matter of mastering it and celebrating it. Let's roll. Welcome to Team Super Dad. Real dads creating their best lives ever. More time, more money, more fun. You are not alone. You're on Team Super Dad. Good morning, welcome. Well, it might not be the morning with you, but it is here. If you're on the live, then yes, hello in the UK.

00:45 If you're on the replay or listening on the podcast, then great to have you on board. I caught myself a little bit unawares. It just started. Well, I didn't just start. But if you got the invite, you would see that I scheduled this to make as many people as aware of this morning's live. It's just being a bit more in control of the marketing and the promotion of it. If you are listening and you feel there's someone who would benefit from the Team Super Dad podcast, then share it with them. Bring everybody in. Let me know where you are and what you're up to. You can comment live on

01:23 most of the socials and I will see it come up in the StreamYard dashboard and bring you into the conversation. If I don't see it, then tough. That's all I can say. I think it's LinkedIn that doesn't pull through. Some destinations won't get comments. Where we go. Yeah, I can see. I can see most of them. So comment away. Winners win. This episode is focused on the subject of winning, the mentality of winning, the attitude of winning. I'm going to help you see that you perhaps don't have the healthiest outlook on what winning means.

02:06 Some people are even quite against the whole concept of winning. You've got this nonsense thing at too many schools where everybody has to have a go and everybody has to have an equal, you know, can't possibly have the experience of losing. And I don't think, I don't mean by that, it's not okay to be inclusive or not to create events where they're perhaps more team events or you have a team score. And of course, that is absolutely essential. But to the detriment of other events, like you can't have a running race where one person wins. Like quite literally, that's how a large percentage of kids think.

02:47 You want to have who's the fastest in the school? And in America, they do this really well because there's a broad mix or something. This is my interpretation and my experience from the times I've been in America with my family over the last 40 years. And you have spelling B's and maths B's and science tests, as well as all the sports stuff and music. And so, you know, we need to hero our strengths. And the idea that winning is a bad concept is exactly what this whole episode is about. If you're following the whole series, you'll know we're going right through the power code, the Team Super Dad power code.

03:29 This is my process and methodology for lifting dads up so that they feel confident, they have clarity, they're focused, they're healthy. They are focused on themselves to create the life they desire, not a life they feel stuck in. And that's not about being selfish. That's not about being self-centered. It's about being the best version of you so that you can be the best dad to your family, so you can lead your business, so you can be the life and soul of whatever event that you happen to want to be at. You can't pour from an empty cup. And that is literally what Team Super Dad is about. It's about filling your cup. So winning falls into ownership.

04:13 Okay, so we have purpose, which is everything about where you're headed and why you're doing it and what your why is. Then we move into ownership. And there's two sides to ownership. One is the negative, like the negative self-talk, the regret, the blame, the frustration, the resentments, this whole negative, toxic energy around how you're thinking about the relationships in your life. It's not that I'm highlighting it so that we can focus on it. It's highlighting it so that you're aware. What would it be like to live without that? Like to not have that negativity dragging you back. The opposite of that, the yin to the yang, is winning, a winner's mindset.

04:56 And in regards to the point about the school, winning. winning, you don't have to finish first to be the winner. Okay. The fat kid that comes last just beat every other kid that didn't run the race. And that's the same for you. When we're competing, when we're working out, when we're performing, when we're learning something, the only person we really need to beat is ourselves. Like what was the best version of ourselves yesterday? And what would it look like to beat that today? What would it be like to operate at 1% more each day?

05:37 Talked about compound leverage in one of the purpose episodes. It's the compound effect of improving something. Here we're talking about ourselves, but the compound effect of improving something a small piece by piece by piece. Sooner or later, the compound effect of that is huge. Darren Hardy's book, The Compound Effect, is bloody brilliant. So winning, the winning mindset is what has you get up and do something you don't want to do. It's what has you get up and run in the rain. Today, my fitness has fallen off a cliff in the last six months and it has been a challenge mentally more than physically.

06:20 The physical side of it is the pain. Living, you know, I say this with some respect to people who have a neuralgia or a pain condition because that is truly debilitating and life-altering. But I have lived with shoulder pain and back pain, neck pain, most days. And it's on my vision board. It's on my mind map, my vision, mind map, again, part of the purpose process around the health and fitness is to be pain-free. It's tricky. You don't want to put those negative words in because you end up focusing on pain rather than free, but

07:01 to have a healthy, vibrant, energized body. And so the mental challenge for me over this period has been, how do I cope with not being as fit as I was a year ago? How do I cope with waking up with a stiff neck again, not being able to look, not being able to look when I'm turning left or right in the car? And how do I, and how do I stay on top of my game? On top of my game, that sounds a little bit wanky, doesn't it? But you know, how do I perform on a daily basis? How do I smile when I'm with my kids or have fun when I'm with my with my girlfriend? Like when this is when this is going on and noticing, physically noticing my fitness going down.

07:46 So, but it is about creating those small wins. Okay, so I'm going to go through a bit of a process here with you today. But before I do that, right, the noticing the small wins, it's about rather than falling on your sword and being like, oh, this is terrible. What could you do to take back some ground? So literally this week, I've had a sports massage. I got introduced to someone by my osteopath. I spoke to her in depth. I went through the whole process, what's been going on. I went back to my osteopath. And so in and around the fitness, I've got exercises for my core and for my rotator

08:31 is in place to be able to take back ground. It's winning and losing a few battles so that ultimately I can win the war. And that is the whole point about mastering your mindset is that you've got to get honest about where you're headed, what a result looks like, and be able to move forward when you don't really feel like it. So number one, we have a concept called the I am list. And I'm just pausing because whatever's going on upstairs, it's getting louder and louder. The Junior J's are back this weekend. The I am list. Okay.

09:15 So in mastering ourselves talk, your I am list, it happens without us trying. We talk about ourselves like, I can't do this. That's too hard. I want to do that, but that's not going to happen. Like it's like all the concern and resignation is what will come up more often than not when we just let our mind run free. But your I am list is a is a reprogramming exercise where you bring the positive aspects about who you are and where you're headed, going back to your vision board and your goals, is that you are working.

09:54 working on this magnificent machine which is our brain and our subconscious mind but it's also quite a dumb machine as well if the input you put in is what it will run with chat gpt is a very pertinent and powerfully exciting example uh maybe a little bit scary if you haven't had a look at it yet but it's all artificial intelligence but what you put in determines what it gives you back out. So you ask good questions, you make good statements, it'll bring you back quality information and help you move forward. And your brain's the same. So your I am list, I am coach, I am daddy, I am runner, I am triathlete, I am homeowner, I am son, I am lover, I am funny, I am inspired.

10:42 These I am investor, I am traveler, I am retired, I am firewalk instructor. These these are parts of my I am list. And when you can pull on them as instantly as that, then you will be aware that you're winning over the negative dialogue that's going on for yourself. Okay, so that's that's your I am list. Notice how you talk about yourself to yourself. Notice where the frustrations come up. As you do this, you may well notice how often you make such statements about other people in your life, but that's another conversation for engage.

11:23 Definitely as equally negative though. So that's your I am list. Now you take your I am list in your journal or in the mirror. You can work on that each day. Even though when you're just flipping, walking along, you can be running through your I am list. I am winner, as we're talking about today. When you're running, when you're exercising, it can become like a mantra, like an affirmation that you are conditioning, reprogramming the reticular activating system in your mind. You are giving it rails to run on. So that when situations come up, the first thing that occurs to you in your mind is not, oh, how am I going to do this? Or this is going to appear a problem or it didn't work last time. What comes up is the new

12:07 stronger position, the creative mindset, the solution mindset, the outlook and attitude that whatever happens, it's going to turn out okay. You've got this handled. I remember at my brother's wedding, I created for myself a way of being, which again, we'll talk about next week, but I created myself a way of being of around me, everything works. That was my mantra for the week. And it's just a bit of fun, but you kind of attract it into you. It's like when someone electric walks into a room and lights the place up, they are a winner. No matter what happens that day, they decided when they woke up.

12:47 Next thing to do is to notice, almost as a reflection, all the times you've won in your life. This for some people is really, really hard because they don't think about themselves as a winner. Or you could be a winner in business, but you could be struggling in your relationship. Or you could be a winner in business, but your relationship with your family is your fitness is on the rocks. So how you speak about yourself, how the dialogue runs, it can't help but bleed into your performance at work.

13:23 So part of the reprogramming, part of the foundations of your winner's mindset is to go back through your life and look at all the places you've won. And by the way, it's not about having a huge list. But you've got to play with it. The times you've won are everything. That first girl you kissed, the time you entered the science, the fair, the time you went for a trial at a team, even if you didn't get picked, even if you didn't come first in that science fair, this is going back to school, you stepped out above all the other people that

14:04 didn't do it. You stepped out of your comfort zone. So be generous with yourself when you're creating this winner's list. Okay. It's all the times you've won. The relationships, the holidays you went on, the places you visited, the experiences you've had, the three pound match three numbers on the lottery, the getting married, buying your first house, learning to ski, cooking an awesome lasagna for your kids that they ate the whole lot and asked for more. It's at this level that I want you to know yourself as winner.

14:47 So that when you then, you can look at this list, you can reflect it, you can see. see to see exactly how when and where you've won the idea that you're not a winner is is bollocks so your I am list and this like reflection on on on all your wins these these are the foundational elements of a winner's mindset now then look at my notes here so the next part of this and it really looks aligns with your with your vision ball with your goals and your mindset with the life that you want to create is that you can now start to marry the two up this positive winner's mindset this attitude of of success you can now start to apply

15:38 and look at the the the goals that you've had and get honest with yourself and notice where you actually you wanted it but you thought oh well i can't really do that because we want to banish the idea that you don't know how to do this or it's not going to work out or i've tried it before and it didn't work then so what's the point that is like if we're talking about manifestation we're talking about consciously creating uh our future it's looking to weed out the doubts the downs doing a podcast you know uh going you know pretty much ad living off of my own methods trainings experience it's it's nerve-wracking right but still you've got to step up and have faith in yourself if you read the uh the

16:30 the post that went with this live you'll you'll see in there i talk about an experience on a on a landmark course once where the person who was leading the the program she said to said she said right who wants to to share basically who's who's got uh something to to say on that what's what's your experience of this subject and no one put their hand up it's like a hundred people there no one put their hand up so she stopped the whole thing she's like are you kidding me are you actually kidding me you're here you've brought yourself into this process to become a more powerful person to become a better person to make a bigger impact in the world and

17:09 part you know a huge part of that is your your confidence your focus your your your drive to push yourself forward and when i ask who wants to share none of you can bring yourself to put your hand up you're you're worried about what you're going to say you're worried about what everyone else is going to think you're worried about getting it wrong like what if that wasn't there at all what if you had confidence that whatever was going to come out of your mouth it was going to work whatever anybody else thought of you they were going to be like at least he gave it a go or or you you you you strike a chord with one person in that room and that conversation leads on to something incredible that

17:48 transforms maybe your world maybe the whole world that is the level at which having a winner's mindset will make a difference in your world and of course your fitness your morning routines your bedtime routines the time you dedicate for your children the time you dedicate for your your partner like if you want to win in each of these areas you've got to get honest about what that's going to take and then you've got to get honest about the result you're looking to perform now when you step out to do it it's not a case of oh god i can't do that it's not worth it it's a case of i don't know how it's going to go but i'm bloody well going to do it anyway

18:34 a winner's mindset is as simple as that and it's a habit that when you apply it consistently over time it will evolve you it will start to reshape who you are how you show up and the results you get so just like doing the press-ups will give you muscles having a winner's mindset will give you strength in every situation and that people will notice that you will notice in your performance in in in your approach to things your willingness to give things a go how people are drawn to you it's the complete opposite of of i can't do it or people who think they always get ill um i'll tell you what one thing i bloody hate and this is kind of around the same subject how you doing oh not bad thanks

19:19 is that the best you can pull out when i'm engaging with you and i want to know how it's going like if you if you're really having a tough time tell me we'll talk about it like oh yeah good to see you actually having a bit of a tough time or or or otherwise it's like do you know what yeah i'm doing good i'm i'm i'm over the divorce i'm i'm i'm getting fit i'm smashing it at work i've got a girlfriend i've the kids are growing up brilliantly i've i'm I'm running the dad's group in town. Get real. And a winner's mindset will give you so much power, so much clarity, so much focus in everything you do.

20:00 And most importantly, it will rub off on the people around you. And if we're talking about our children, that is huge. Instilling a winner's mindset in your children is probably the biggest gift, well, not the biggest. If I was going to talk about gifts for our kids, a loving outlook, a trusting outlook, a winner's mindset, empathy with people around them. But a winner's mindset in our children is absolutely vital. Like the idea that whatever they're interested in, whatever they want to go for, that they've got just as much chance of smashing it, of winning it, of it making an impact on their lives, whether they come first or come last.

20:43 And that's why I flipping hate the beanbag on the head relay races on a school sports day. It's essential that our children are given the idea that simply by competing, they've already won, simply by stepping out and giving their best, they've already won. When we can do that in the world, we'll start to make a huge difference on the results that we see everywhere. So the results that you see everywhere. Come along and get involved with all I'm doing here at Team Superdad.

21:18 If you are ready to step up and create the success you want at home as well as work, in your relationships, in your health, in the time you spend with your children, to be that man that is absolutely winning in all areas, then drop over to teamsuperdad.com 15 call. That's one five call. And you can grab one of the sessions with me each week where we get introduced, find out what the kind of goals that you want to have, the challenges you're experiencing, and how we can actually make it happen in the Power Code and the Hero Academy. Awesome to see you. Thanks for being here. Leave us a comment, reply, review, share. Do all of it to help take the Team Super Dad podcast further. I'm here to help and serve.

22:03 I can't wait to meet you all. Have a great rest of your day. Team Super Dad out. This has been Team Super Dad. Find us at teamsuperdad.com. Join the program and create the best life ever for you and your children. You are not alone. You're on Team Super Dad.