Keeping It Real - The Wrap Up #48

00:00 Welcome. It's Monday night. It's the start of the week. It's the end of the last week, and that can only mean one thing. Yes, we're back. It is Team Superdad here, Johnny Jensen and Glenn, a dating dad, back for the wrap-up. Let's roll theme. Welcome to Team Super Dad. Real dads creating their best lives ever. More time, more money, more fun. You are not alone. You're on Team Super Dad. Glenn, good evening to you. Unmute mic. There we go. Yeah, that's going to help. I mean, normally people want to mute me, but yeah, I'm not going to be able to say good morning.

00:44 How the devil are you if you can't hear me? Unmuting. If only it's like they do that, you know, it's like a YouTube thing, the pause game or the mute game. You know, it's if your kids watch that, but I don't know, but there was a movie that involved David Hasselhoff, and I think it was Adam Sandler, and he had like a remote control that he could pause or rewind or stuff like that. It was called Click, I believe. Ah, that's the puppy. I think genuinely my ex, she made me. I say she didn't make me watch it. She literally watched it and then went back and paused and fast-forwarded through to the few bits that were worth watching. So actually, the hour and a half movie was about three minutes long and it was all the better for it, I've got to say.

01:27 Perfect. The highlights, the absolute highlights. Well, good evening, everybody. Welcome back to the wrap-up. This is Johnny Jensen, founder and creator, that's me, of Team Superdad and the Hero Academy, an irresistible community for modern men creating the life they desire, getting out of the life they feel stuck in. And Glenn from Twitter fame of a dating dad infamy. Infamy. Yeah, absolutely. As the free amigos of, or obviously you once said it's got a dual purpose meaning there. So I'll take in for me. We're thinking infamy, infamy. They've all got it in for me.

02:08 There's one for the kids. Is that fucking it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So welcome. We're on episode 48 of the wrap-up. The wrap-up is our weekly jaunt through our experiences of the last seven days as dads, as men, as people on this planet. And there's been a lot happening this week. One thing, I can't promise I'm in that funny a mood tonight, Glenn. This could be a little bit philosophical. That's all good, man. You can't have highs without, you can't have light without shades. So sometimes you just need a little bit of variety to make sure everyone realizes that it's not all fun and games in Team Super Dad Towers 24-7.

02:50 Yeah, the highs and lows and keeping it real. I have called the wrap-up, this week's episode of the wrap-up, I've called Keeping It Real with this expectation, this anticipation in mind, which I will wander us all through in just a moment. But you, and I say you, I'm talking about the listeners and the viewers. If you're watching live right now, then give us a little hello, a hashtag live. Tell us where you are, what you're up to. We can see you. Well, we can't see you by face, but we can see your comments coming in. So by all means, drop us a comment and pretty much wherever you're watching, they will come through to me. If we don't reply, quite often means I've told you to comment and then not realize that you have.

03:34 So that's probably what we're talking about. But if you're listening on the podcast, well, then that's great to have you here. Please remember to subscribe and leave us a review if you're listening on iTunes because that helps us spread the word of Team Superdad. And if you want to join that irresistible community of modern men that I spoke about, then come on over to teamsuperdad.com forward slash group and you will be welcome. We have the power list. We have weekly training. Although I'm moving the trainings to monthly, we're doing a weekly Q ⁇ A hangout type session, but we're moving the training sessions to monthly. And of course, inside of the Hero Academy, then that's our premiere program, our paid community, our paid coaching activity group, a life accelerator for busy modern dads.

04:24 And yeah, if you go to join.teamsuperdad.com, you can find out all about that and pre-register. So that's the formals done. How's your week been, Glenn? I see you're wearing a Tottenham shirt, which obviously we don't like to talk too much about football, but it is. Oh, we do this week. We do this week. Glenn and I, for those who don't know, by pure coincidence, both happen to be Tottenham fans. So if you are Chelsea or Arsenal or basically anyone that hates Tottenham, please don't let that put you off. But if you are Woolwich, please do get in. touch and tell us how your weekend was.

05:04 The thing is, first, let's talk about football for a moment, but let's talk about football kind of like in a general way. It's there's always a bizarre set of results that first weekend, isn't there? There's always so. If you were playing, it doesn't even matter if you're the Woolwich, right? If you were playing the team that had just came up and you were playing them on the first night, and it's like Friday night football, which isn't normally even a thing, and you were the only game. If you were the, like, if that had been Tottenham playing Brentford, right? I'd have been like, oh, shit. We are definitely losing this match, right? Oh, absolutely. In some ways, I couldn't think of a better way to start than playing City because City are the champions.

05:50 They're not only the champions, they're the champions who have basically spent £100 million on a squad player. Their fourth choice centre-back costs 40 million quid. They're just so far in a different league financially. They've doped it so badly that it doesn't even matter. It's a free swing. And they're the hardest game you're going to have all season. So let's just get it out of the way quick. Just get out of the way first. Because if you lose, then you don't matter. It doesn't matter. You can then just carry on with your life and restart the week after. Only we didn't lose, did we? No, we didn't. And we played Greg. But literally, we were Brentford last night. Totten were Brentford. City. Sorry, yeah, we should have.

06:35 We were playing the champions. They should have won. Arsenal should have beaten Brentford in the grand scheme of sort of football hierarchy and sort of what happens next kind of thing. But yeah, so in a free hit kind of way, we got to say, fuck, how did that happen? And it's great because it reinforces opening day. For me, the kind of opening day of the football season is almost more fun than New Year's Eve because New Year's Eve is always a letdown. I can't remember the last time I actually went and did something on New Year's and it was just, you know what,

07:16 this is brilliant. Everything about this evening has been perfect. Whereas in football season, you've got the whole build-up of the summer and the transfers and it's Schrodinger's season. It's both the best season in the world and the worst season. Everything is possible. And then it kicks off. And most years, it's like New Year's. It's a bit of a letdown. But this year it wasn't. It's making me think that the next nine months of football, 10 months of football, are going to be outstanding. And if football is good, I'm good. Yeah, I'm with you. I'm with you. And it is like a New Year's Eve in that, you know, okay, I've been waiting for this day. I now know that we're going to go through autumn and then winter and then spring. And then in May, it's going to be the end of the season, the FA Cup, and where will we be?

08:00 And so, like, it is like, oh my gosh, what are we going to do? And not just what we're going to do football-wise in the next nine months, but like, oh, my gosh, like Christmas and birthdays and school. And like, so in my mind, there is a year that runs January to December, but there's also another year called a season, which runs August to May. And like, that's, I've got a point of reference there, which is, what am I going to, you know, what's going to happen between now and Christmas? What's going to happen between now? And then, okay, now, now there's nothing to talk about for next month. Of course, the Euros or the World Cup. But yeah, so there we go. And just for any listener that

08:43 can't see what Glenn is wearing, Glenn is wearing, he's wearing the Tottenham away shirt for when we were sponsored by Kappa, which is actually a skin tight number. I tell you what, it's more skin tight now than it was when I bought it. I think this must have been about 2005, something like that, 2006. And yeah, Kappa, this year, I think we only did this style one year, but yeah, it is, it's tight, skin kind of clinging. The material clings to you in a way that no other football kit I've ever experienced has. Basically, it's like a speed suit. It's like one of those cyclists or 100 mile an hour skiing thing.

09:26 So whoever designed this, our friends in Italy, the Kappa designers, were not thinking of the average British bloke in a pub. No, no, they absolutely were. They were purely thinking about some sort of Italian god because there's no way, no way that this was designed for Dave from Croydon. I wonder who I was in. Was it Levy in charge then? I always think when I'd love to. do you know what'd be an interesting flipping Amazon documentary would be to be the fly on the wall camera when the designers come round to the football clubs with the new shirts? Well, that's the thing. And again, we don't want to make this too much about Spurs, but

10:13 there's a new Spurs, I want to say, away kit, third kit or something like that. And did you ever at school do these like oil watercoloury things where there'd be you'd put like a tray of water and then paint would sit on top of it and you make all these swirly kind of shapes and then splodge a bit of paper on and that was it and it was kind of this weird swirl of colours. It looks basically like a toddler has swallowed a bunch of acrylics and then vomited onto a shirt and somehow it looks incredible and I bloody love it. Yeah, that is that is the Spurs 2021-22 away kit. But yeah, lots of clubs have have kits that they weigh. The Woolwich had that

10:54 horrible thing. It must have been six or seven years ago, but it was like it was white and red kind of hexagons and really messed with your messed with your mind. Every club has got a if like if you're a true sports fan, it doesn't even have to be football, but I guess it's only been recently cricket clubs have got their kits. But we all know a season where we had a shit kit, don't we? Oh, yeah, yeah. So somebody of ours. I mean, I don't like the Spurs kits that have got the new AIA logo because that's in red. You shouldn't really have red on your on your Spurs kit too much outside of the logo. And the new logo, this is the old logo. It's got tiny little bits of red in it, but the new logo, no red at all. And so, yeah, if there's any version of a Spurs kit where there's no red on it, I'm a happy bunny.

11:38 Have you seen any of the websites where they do like these fan designs? They're flipping awesome. Fan design? I've seen that for F1. No, no. So what you've got is there are, and I don't know the hashtags. Okay, so hopefully someone who's watching now or listening will remind me, but you can get the hashtags. So they're called, they're called, they're called, they're fan kits. But that's not it. But they are like basically fan kits, basically, yeah. And so these like concept kits kind of kind of stuff.

12:16 And they're awesome. All clubs. All clubs. Flipping awesome. But I think the fly on the wall documentary will be funny. And we could get Dom Jolly and who's the guy with the little hand? Jeremy Beadle. Dom Jolly, Derek Jeremy Beadle. Out from the grave. Out from the grave, yeah. And would team up and they would create this program where they pretend to be designers and they parade the upcoming kits to the chairman. It's the same team that designed the cockrocket for Elon Musk. The same team that designed the cockroach for Jeff Bezos. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

13:00 So, in fact, that's who designed that. Somewhere, Dom Jolly and the spirit of Jeremy Beadle are absolutely creasing up because they've been to space, basically. For those people who don't know Dom Jolly, he was a TV show. Trigger Happy TV. Trigger Happy TV. It wasn't really a prank show, but they did things on the street so people weren't really aware that what was going on wasn't real. It's on Amazon as well. It's on Amazon. So if you've got Amazon Prime, dig it out.

13:41 It has stood the test of time. It's absolutely. It was like YouTube and TikTok before they were even a thing. It's from the mid-late, late 90s, I think. True. Actual skips, like not sketches like Laurel and Hardy or sketches. Kidding camera stuff. Kidding cameras. TikTok skits. Like, yeah. Some of the flipping TikTok. Some of the stage ones now. I saw this thing on Facebook came out today, right? You know, America loves its vets subject, doesn't it? Right? Vets. Veterans. Veterinarians. No, not veterinarians. I mean like veteran soldiers, right? So they had this.

14:23 So this kid, he's standing with his dad at a coin counting machine, for the record, or a shit show because they take like flipping 20% of your money anyway. Then they're watching this old guy struggle to put his coins in. So then the kid has a word with the dad. And then each time the old boy turns his back, the kid puts some of his pennies in the old. boy's like. So now he's standing there looking at it. He's totaling it up. The kid's now put all his piggy bank money in there. And instead of getting 10 bucks, the guy's got like 50 bucks. So he's now like baffled and working out. So it's all staged. I was like thinking, this is ridiculous.

15:08 Like, what message are we do we need to get out here in such a staged fashion? Yes. How did such a weird thing? How did he dress up as a policeman, throw someone's car in a river, and then that person would fail to recognize that he was Jeremy Beadle, or that the idea that their car was in the river was odd. Well, it's one of those things where it was a movie at the Truman show, I think it was. He said, one of the questionnaire is, you accept the reality you're given. And we all accept what we're told as this is the truth, this is normal.

15:48 And it's only in hindsight you think, that was bloody. How did how did that because it's always an escalation? It's always every phase of it is within the realms of possibility and believability. And if you look at it in totality, the end point is so far away and messed up from where you started, you're thinking, God, that's weird. But it's the whole boiling frog thing of you know, it every little stage of that is weird, but it's not that much weirder than what came before. And so you can push people and push them and push them and push them further than you ever could before. Ah, so at the point he walks in with the policeman's outfit on, you're so far detached from that I'm on Jeremy Beatles. What was that program called? Beadles about

16:31 not that difficult, Johnny. It's a good job you're here, Glenn. It's a good job. You're my perfect foil, basically, because I'm such a mong. But funny, we should talk about all those coincidental things, right? This is the philosophical part of my week, right? The good lady and I have been dating now for six months. Six. I mean, I'm shocked, not shocked that it shouldn't have lasted. I'm shocked that it's gone so quickly. I still look back and remember the first pod after you met. And he was like, I've been on a date, first date in ages, and it went really well.

17:16 It's like, this is amazing. How was that six months ago? Because six months for you is also six months for me. And I've done fuck all in that part. True. True dat. True dat. What it's like, like a five-year thing. I was looking at like what's happening of Google, not Google, Facebook threw up a video that I posted in 2016 of me in the gym doing 44 press-ups. And I'm going, I couldn't have done this a year ago. I was in a hole. How I pulled myself back together, 44 press-ups. So today was day 60 of my Super Dad workout challenge, which is actually two cycles.

17:57 So it's 30 days of fitness plus 30 days of fitness. I've just done 60 days. This is how it all you're going to have to hang in there. If you're watching, if you're listening, you're going to have to hang in there as I try and share how all this mad stuff all happened, like culminated in this weekend. Okay, this weekend. I should have a name for it. You know, they're like, I can't think what the day would be, but it wouldn't be, it might be Beadles, Johnny's Beadle weekend. Beetle 2.0. So, right. I know this weekend's coming up as well because the girlfriend, she's got a picture of us in her bedroom.

18:44 See, all these little steps. This is what Jeremy's all about. It's just getting, instead of a little bit mental, it's just getting a little bit better. And then you look back and you think, fuck me, this is a long way from where I was six months ago, but in a good way this time. I know. So I turn up. Plus, I've been thinking about, because I was thinking, well, it's six months. So we kind of joked about it being six months. And I go, well, six months. What is like, do you, do you get a card? Do you get some flowers? Do you make something? Do you buy a buyer Dyson? Like, do you like. It's all about the shark, my friend. All about the shark. What do you do? So, so, yeah, so last week, before the Beetle, Beetle 2.0 weekend,

19:29 yeah, get together around to have a picture of me and her in the bedroom. And it's a nice picture. So it's all cool, but still, like, it's like, it's sent like, ooh, what's it like, like, rumble strip, like a rumble strip, like on the motorway when you're just a bit tired and you veer off a little. bit onto the hard and uh so I was like, okay, that's cool, that's cool. Six months, okay, that's cool, that's cool. Um, should I, you know, does that mean anything? No, no, that's fine. It just means we're getting, you know, we're getting on, done the whole I love you thing ages ago, so so we're cool, and and it's awesome, like there's like it's still good, right? Still, there's no, there's no, no, no problem there at all. Um, but then I'm like, okay, so, but in my mind, so I did this thing for it was quite nice.

20:11 I did like 21 things I love about you. Have you ever done that to someone? Yes. Yes. It's hard because you want to make them all different and kind of distinct and it's hard not to have the overlap between some of them. Well, here's, and I've actually got an activity like this inside the Hero Academy around relationships and reconnecting. Take the person you love or your kids, right? You know, significant partner, your children, and to have them feel like you appreciate and notice them is it doesn't have to be 21, but even if it's 10,

20:52 you'd be surprised how hard it is to start to start with. But then when you relax and you get into it, you start to go, oh, actually, I really appreciate that. Oh, actually, there's that thing about. Oh, actually, and definitely aim for 20 because that's a good number. If you can't think of five, I don't know that's a good thing. If you genuinely can't think of five things you flipping love about someone, then we may need to have a different conversation. Mate, I can think of five things I love about fried chicken. You should be able to do that about the woman you love. Yeah, well, I've done this exercise with dads, with dad coaching clients.

21:31 And you know, the curious thing about it, and I suppose it's bloody obvious as well, is people get out of the habit of noticing or being grateful or appreciating or acknowledging. So, and that's when someone turns around and says, I don't feel even noticed, let alone loved by you. So it's a good exercise in that regard. So yeah, so came up with, it was about, I ended up being about 24 because I kept, once you get in a flow, I kept adding to it. So I've done that. And then, where were we? Where were we? Friday. Can't even remember. Oh, yeah. So then my brother rings up.

22:13 My brother lives in France, as we've talked about before. In Lake Annecy, beautiful, right? So we haven't seen them for flipping two years. You haven't seen your mum for no. You told me you didn't seen your mum for two years. Two years, yeah. Yeah, she's coming to visit in two weeks' time. And me and the kids are just so excited to see her. It's amazing how time flies, but also it feels like forever. And if you want to get a bit emotional about it, it's flipping awful. Yeah, I can't imagine because I know I haven't seen my sister for a long time because she lives in Melbourne. You know, she lives in, you know, straight. The last time I saw her was when we were both in Nepal doing Everest.

22:54 So you don't see each other very often. And that's fine because you accept that they're in a different place. But my mum's in Essex. She's on the coast of Essex. She's a couple of hours' drive away. Yet I've not seen her for two years. I've seen her, but like on camera, but not being able to give her a hug and just chat in person. And it is really, really different. And I'm really looking forward to just sitting and talking and relaxing and smiling in my mum's presence. Yeah, and hugging her. Yeah, mega, absolutely mega. So my brother rings up, same sort of deal.

23:33 He's getting work done on the house in France. They were away on holiday in Cyprus and the builders are doing some extra stuff, which meant they couldn't really go back. He's like, okay, well, we're going to come back via England and try and see everyone in four days. And my kids have been nuts for the last 18 months, 24 months about not seeing their cousins because they're really close. We do that. Cousins are like brothers and sisters in our family. It's a lot of love and connection and can't wait to see each other. And so, yeah, so the Friday, I've got a brunch at my auntie's house, who's my mum figure.

24:13 My sister's there again, not seen her for a while. Sunshine, and we're all there having brunch. There's kids everywhere. And Jo was going to come, but she wasn't able to because she had shared clients to see. And so that was the Friday. So then the Saturday, I had to take the kids back to their mother because it wasn't even my weekend. And then the Saturday was this six-month anniversary thing. So we went back to where we had our first date and did a went on the ones. Oh, that's nice. That's a good touch. Walked a dog. And it was so funny that the venue, the hotel, the country park thing.

24:53 They were having a wedding show, like an open day for people who wanted to come and. Do tell me. Tell me you proposed. No, no, I did not propose. I have learned that lesson. But in true Ghostbusters style, as we approached the building and the woman said to us, oh, hi, are you here for the wedding show? I said, yes, of course we are. Well, because you know how many drinks are on offer, right? Exactly. I'm totally with you on this one. Ray, if someone asks you if you're a god, you say yes. That was a line in a movie, right? Obviously, like a comedy-based line in Ghostbusters.

25:37 I really took that as a as a as a as an in-stone lesson for life. Yeah. Yeah, it doesn't matter what lesson they were trying to throw out. It's a lesson you took. And they can't take that back. There's no take back season. So when she said, she goes, you can't say that. I was like, well, we'll just go with the flow because we don't know what's so. Then she goes, okay, we'll just fill this in and I'll start. I'll do the tour. I was like, okay, well, I said, well, we just got here. Can we go for a drink first, please? So we went there. It was, it was, it was lovely sound. So then I pull out this gift, which I'd put in a frame and it's like heart. It was like all these 25 things I know. Kind of thing. So,

26:23 so yeah, so she goes, that's the most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me. Whoa, okay, good. But again, like these kind of like moments in moments in the weekend, like home, like either of those would have been a high point of a weekend. Yeah. Just on their own with nothing else happening. That would have been a, you know what? This was a good weekend for that reason. And you had two of them. Exactly. So then I meet a bunch of her mates in Ashford on the Saturday night. Sunny, hello. Who'd have thought the sun comes out in the summer? How was it? Did there did her friends have you met them before? Did they take to you?

27:06 Were there any hot single women there who are getting a bit desperate? Do you know? Well, no, but I don't, we need to. I will, yeah, we'll, in terms of hot women, maybe desperate, maybe, maybe not. Don't let me derail you, Kerry. So we've got to keep furnishing this. I've got to keep asking people when I meet them, you know. So we need to, particularly as we're local to each other, I can get the introductions going from my friend Glenn.

27:45 But yeah, so you met her friends and it went well? Yeah, I'm good. I'm a good, I'm a, I'm a good. They approve. Yeah. Oh, sorry. I missed out Friday night. Friday night? No, is that? Yeah. Friday night. My brother's wife is my best mate from school's sister. Okay. So again, as part of this whole kind of we're back, let's everyone get together. We were at his house having a barbecue to which Joe did come. So she now meeting my brother for the first time and his wife and all the kids. Then the Saturday night with Saturday daytime, go back to the walk and the stuff and meeting her friends at Ashford, drinking beers.

28:28 I'm a bit of a lightweight with the old beers, but sunshine. Can you see my son? I've got quite a bit of a not doing its best. I am red, basically, pretty red from being in the sun all weekend. And so, yeah, a lot of people there wake up on Sunday morning, had a bit of a skinful. The gin and tonic before bed was not necessary. That means it was the best one of the day. Why can't you say no? Because you don't need to. Why would you say no? You should always, like you're saying, if someone asks you if you want a gin and tonic before bed, you always say yes.

29:09 Yes, there we go. So that's that's what happened. And it would have felt weird to say no. And then she'd have had to sit and drink a gin and tonic on her own. Exactly. You basically, it was a gentlemanly thing to do. Yeah. But then I'd have smelled her gin and tonic. We'd be like, oh, that smells nice. Let's have a sip. Then be like, well, you should have just had your own one. But in the morning, I was kind of not really happy about the gin and tonic. at bed. And then off to Brighton, we go. And Brighton's a big place, right? Yes, there's a lot of parking spaces. Yeah. So I've got an idea. We're going to park near the police station because we're meeting my brother at the pier. So I've got an idea we're going to park near the police station.

29:52 Sodslaw, the parking in the police station is only two hours long. I know we're going to be longer. So now I drive down to the kind of the seafront where I know there's longer parking spaces. I used to live in Kemptown, near pretty much looking over the sea, basically. I didn't really want to leave Brighton, but part of the collateral damage of the choices I made around marriage had it be that sometime after we got together, we ended up moving out of Brighton, mainly because we didn't have enough money to get a bigger house, but also she didn't like living in Brighton. So then we ended up back in Maidstone. So every time I go back there, I'm like, oh shit, I wish I still lived here. Guess where the only parking space we could find was Maidstone?

30:37 No, the end of the bloody road I used to live on. That is that is coincidence. This is twisted. I'm like, this is weird. Surely there's another parking space. But no, it just opened up. You know, when the car pulls out, you're like looking for space, looking for space, and then the car pulls out just in front of you. I'm like, thank you, God. You know, like, but at the end of my road, are you kidding me? So, not thank you, God. Thank you, Beadle. Um, and there we go. We're down at the pier. It's having such fun. My daughter, I've not seen her so happy for I'm not joking. I don't think I've seen my daughter so happy for a few months.

31:17 How long ago did you move? Did she remember Brighton? Oh, no, my kids weren't born. Neither kid was born in Brighton. Oh, okay. No. But when my brother lived there before he moved to France, the kids loved going there. They loved seeing their cousins. They loved hanging out. Cousins, for me, cousins, and we've got we got family in Chicago. They're like second cousins twice removed. But we're as close as brother and sister, like Rob and Mary are pretty much like my American mum and dad, basically. So there's no real distinction between how close you are as cousins. And equally, I've got cousins from other parts of the family. I don't even really know. But on that side of the family, we're all really, really, very close.

32:03 And say, Brighton Pier, brilliant. We get absolutely stiffed on the old wrist passes, ride all day. And the sun's shining. Round and round, I don't go on round and round rides. As in, like, merry-go-rounds or carousels or teacups. Where else? Oh, the flipping thing where the floor drops out and they spin you around one hour, like the cage. I think so. No way. Yeah, have a skinful kit on it. I'll throw up. If you spin me round and round, I will throw up. Maybe I'm going to be sitting on the inside of it.

32:47 It depends. If it's going clockwise, you want to be. Either way, centrifugal force is going out. You want to be no, nothing to go. I could do roller coasters, but not round and round. But yeah, bloody brilliant. Bloody brilliant. Then of course there's the goodbyes. Very emotional. Oh, kids are crying. It's flipping. So basically, do you remember the ice bucket challenge from a couple of years ago? Yeah, the Lou Gehrig. And then afterwards, we had dinner with my dad afterwards, who's now 78, shuffling around, not as well as he used to be. And he's meeting Joe for the first time. And

33:27 he's good. He's mellowed in his old age. His abuse is much more polite. It's polite abuse. The affection in his abuse is much more noticeable now. So yeah, the ice bucket challenge. I literally had this emotional ice bucket thrown over me this weekend. And I think that happens. I think that happens. It's the comparison or the reference to Beadle and the prank show is when you have those kind of weekends.

34:06 I woke up feeling shit today. I literally felt like I'd been hit by a bus. Didn't want to do anything. See, I have that sometimes after I've had a fantastic day. Like I remember a couple of weeks ago, we were probably on talking about a show. I closed a couple of phone calls from where I was on leave, but a couple of big deals closed and a few other things lined up. and it just seemed like everything went right. And a couple of things personally was in a good place, and so I felt really good. And then the next day, like you say, it's just a dip, it's like drinking, and then the next day you have the hangover. Sometimes you have the emotional high or intensity, and then no matter what you do, you can't sustain that, you can't live at that level.

34:51 You have to balance it out by just coming down a little bit, and that dip is sometimes quite tough, yeah. And being okay with it, like noticing it and being okay with it is the important thing. Uh, days gone by when I was younger, I would allow that down to be like, oh, like a roller coaster, I'm going down, and it's not good, I'm not happy, and then like wallowing in the upset of it all. Failing to realize exactly as you just pointed out there that if you've had

35:32 an emotional high of any of any kind, then there's probably going to be a low afterwards. And just, I guess, kind of be aware of it, be ready for it. Be don't, don't feel your feelings. Like, for me, drinking is merely borrowing happiness from tomorrow, and at some point, you've got to pay that back, you know. And so, tomorrow, you have to pay it back with the other side. And sometimes it's the same with emotions, knowing this isn't an isn't. I'm no psychologist, a psychiatrist, or anything like that, I've not studied it at all. But knowing that on that dip, this isn't necessarily the start of some that's not the new normal.

36:12 Just like the intense highs weren't the new normal, it's just something that's going to happen. Feel it, own it, come through it, and get back up to more of a level playing field. And sometimes you'll be a bit higher, sometimes a bit lower. But both of those are fine as long as you're having ups as well as downs. Then, absolutely, just enjoy them because you can't have the light without the shade, you can't have the peak without the trough. And just everyone needs a bit of both in their life. Yeah, did you realize that when you were younger? When I was younger, uh, not so much. Um, I'm 40 now, I'm an old man basically, so it's taken me a long time to feel comfortable with everything.

36:52 But I felt it for I've always been quite a level person anyway. And I did, um, I used to run events and so on. And I always knew the day after running a big event when you've got 150 people, 200 people in front of you, and you're on stage and you're doing this, you're doing that. There was always like a lull and a dip, and uh, God, that went so well, and it's never going to be as good as that again. Um, and shit, I was rubbish, this didn't go well, that didn't go well, my boss probably hates me. And actually, it was fine, but there was always that dip. And if you didn't have a dip, then you stayed there, and then the dip would be even higher, harder as well. So, you have to balance out and level out. Yeah, so that's self-care, that is that is

37:37 self-awareness, self-care, also baking it into uh the schedule. A great book, a great book, come on, Brain. Why do I do this? I know, I know it's performance, it's called Peak Performance. Okay, in the book, Peak Performance, uh, he actually um says this: make sure when you've got something big going on, make sure you that you plan a day or two days afterwards because there's going to be a you know, we talk about it in drug terms, there's going to be a come down. If you talk about a booze term, there's going to be a hangover.

38:21 If you talk about but people come back from the Olympics, I bet they must yeah, that'd be a huge dip. I mean, we we tell our teams because I mean, I work in kind of sales, and after we've put together a proposal and done a presentation, you you take the next day off, no, no exceptions, and unless you know, you there's no option, yeah, given a choice, all things been you take the next day off because it's you're gonna you're gonna burn out, otherwise, you can't just roll on to the next one or roll on to the next one. You need some time to recover just emotionally and like the energy, yeah, yeah, yeah. And people that own their own businesses will often say, I can't do that, or I haven't got time for that, or that's a luxury I can't afford.

39:02 But burnout is real, yeah, yeah, and it's not they haven't they haven't got time for it, they're not making time for it, they're not finding time for it. The time's there, they're just choosing not to invest any of that time in something else that in the long term will pay out, it will benefit them to take that step back because they'll be able to then like maintain a level of performance. But if they if they try and do it, that that level. that high gets lower and lower and lower and then before they know it they can't get themselves out and they get you get stuck in a rut yeah yeah totally that's why a lot of business owners um do burn out they lose the buzz for for it because the

39:41 the excitement for for growing the business then suddenly is without realizing it's become the thing that's draining them of all their energy of all their love for life Yeah, and then once you've lost love for your business, whatever that business is going to be, you're not going to give it your full attention. You're not going to give it the care because it's like watering a dead plant. There's a part of it in the back of your mind that says, it might get back if I look after it, but you know, it's probably dead already. And so you just don't, you just don't think about it and you just leave it to Will. And even if you could have saved it, you just don't believe it. And yeah, with a business, I'm guessing I've never started my own business, but you have to utterly believe that

40:20 it's going to work and be willing to invest that energy and emotion because it's a baby. It's one of your babies, you know, it's something that you're putting your time and love into. You wouldn't do unless you wanted to make it happen. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. And that's well, we, I've actually, I wrote a Facebook post today all about blips versus breakdowns. Oh, right. Yeah. And I'm going to do a video on it tomorrow. But yeah, noticing that a blip is something that went wrong, something that in the grand scheme of things probably would go wrong.

40:58 You could expect it to. If you were on a diet, you might have a flipping fall off the wagon day and get pissed and eat three kebabs. Like, it's just, but if you make it that that's the whole thing ruined, that's that's the disaster that I can't possibly come back from. Then you go into go into breakdown. And yeah, we well, I was just saying, blips, when you've got, when you can see clearly where you're headed, there's much more capacity to absorb a blip. Whereas if you're living every day, like, this is the one, this is the one I've got to do, then it's not a blip. It's like that day is ruined. If that day was everything, then everything's ruined. And you've got to be able to forgive yourself with the blips.

41:40 In one of my previous lives, we used to run marketing campaigns for various people. We worked one organization who were doing stuff around New Year's resolutions. And we did some A-B testing on this. We actually ran separate campaigns. Some of them were for people. Basically, it was, you've made your resolutions, stick to them. You can't break. If you break them, then you know what? You've lost out all that work, all that hard work you've put in so far. And the other one was, look, if you mess up, yeah, okay, you try not to mess up. If you do mess up, it's all right. Let's start again tomorrow. And I can't, it's by orders of magnitude. The latter, if you mess up, try not to mess up, but if not, we'll start again.

42:22 Start again from the next day. We'll get back on it. They kept their New Year's resolutions for longer, did better, and were more successful in every way, shape, and form around that than those who it was the be-all and end or, you know what, put the pressure on you. You must be perfect every day. No one's perfect every day. I'm not sure I understand. No, I know and understand either, Siri. People aren't perfect and being able to forgive yourself and say, all right, that didn't work. All right. Okay. Let's start again. Let's go again. Those are the people who have stickability and these sort of things. They're the people who are going to succeed on whatever they're challenging because they know it's going to be hard.

43:01 They know it's going to be tough and they're going to stumble. But like Bruce Wayne was taught by Alfred, it's not about how many times you fall down. It's about how many times you get back up again. Yeah. You know, the funny thing is linking that back into my weekend. And this is actually, this is pretty much a perfect way to sort of wrap up the wrap up. Is I'd spoke to my dad at the beginning of the weekend and said, we're going to be down. I'm not really sure what's happening, but we'll end up like we'll have dinner at the end. We'll have Sunday lunch and we'll have dinner at the end of the day. And all through the day, times kept shifting. People were late. Breakfast was this.

43:40 A brother wasn't ready to leave his mate's house for an hour later than we thought we were going to be. It all just kept shifting and changing. And I know there'll be families, just like the ones you see in Ikea, right? Rowing their way around, Ikea. There will be families. And I dare say it could have been me in the past, where every time something went wrong on that Sunday and the plan got messed up, we just kept moving and morphing. And when there was no parking spaces, I ended up parking outside my old house, and I'm there with my new girlfriend. It was just like, no, that's fine. We'll walk along in the sun. If at any point we'd allowed those things to cause more.

44:19 more of a problem than was necessary, I probably wouldn't have seen my daughter so ecstatically happy on the rides with her cousins because we had a row or something. And in all the stress about what time I had to be at my dad's and what time were we going to be having lunch and we'll be making home in time for the football. If we'd have stressed about that, it would have ruined the day as well. As it happened, thanks to the wonders of Sky Plus and pubs being open and serving food all day in Brighton, we had dinner at half past five and we watched the football at eight o'clock and it was a bloody awesome dinner. A chance to hang out with my dad for two hours and we got home and watched the football in Spurs one.

45:04 It was like out of all that craziness, it touched down on the tarmac to bring to a close the perfect end of a weekend. I guess time like days like that are a bit you know it's like it's like throwing a paper boat into a river. You throw it in there and you know where it's going to end up down the river, but you don't know exactly where it's going to end up and you certainly don't know whether an eddy or a whirlpool here or a rock there is going to push it in like on one side of the river and the other side of the river. But as long as it's in there and as long as it's keeping on moving, it's going to get down there and end up down the river. And wherever it ends up is where it ends up. But it sounds like you had like a

45:49 an incredibly memorable, emotion, emotionally charged weekend and it went well. It did in the grand scheme of things. I can look back and go, shit in hell. That was a mad like all those things happened at one on one weekend. Yeah. And it actually all went great. So yeah. It all went great. So brilliant. We're going to be here as long as we can, as long as we enjoy doing this. We'll keep doing the wrap-up.

46:29 We've got episode 50 coming up in two weeks' time. Apologies for missing last week. Anybody who's wondering where the hell we were last week. My fault. Yeah, I totally didn't even think about it. And as we were talking about earlier about romance and shit, I went out on a first date. And it didn't even, it was so, I was so light, like expecting like every other date that I end up planning gets cancelled. I was fully expecting this one to go wrong as well. They were going to a festival at the weekend and she was pretty still drinking on Sunday and hungover and shit. And I fully expected her to call me on Monday to say, oh, look, I'm really sorry. I'm not feeling it. Can we rearrange?

47:12 That's that's what always happens. But she didn't. We went out. I drove up to fucking Northampton. Three hours it took me to get out there. Took her out for dinner and two hours on the way home. So yeah, that was a long old drive. But it was nice to be able to listen to podcasts, if nothing else. The yin with the yang. Yeah, gotta get those small victories in situations like this. They are stepping stones. Yes. They are stepping stones. If you've listened to the podcast for the last six, seven, no, it must be nine months now. Yeah, longer than your relationship. You'd have heard some of my stepping stones along the way.

47:53 A client of mine right now, he's a divorced dad, and we've been rebuilding and putting everything back together. And he's been experiencing quite a bizarre long-distance sort of Zoom dating experience with someone. And I keep saying to him, just allow this to be crazy and perfect. Because when you meet someone who's in a coffee shop around the corner for you, this craziness here will make that even more normal.

48:36 And I think that's what happens in life. We get thrown things to help us get ready for tomorrow, basically. I wish I had your faith in such a grand plan, but I just figure things happen and you make of them what you make. And I could have either made of that five hours worth of journey like a negative and get pissed off at dating and get pissed off at this and angry and annoyed about that. Or I can say it was good. I got a dinner and I reminded myself, I'm really good at dates. I'm really good at first dates and talking and that sort of stuff. haven't forgotten how to do it. So, yeah, it was good. It was worth doing. Nice.

49:21 Nice. I can't wait to hear the next installment of both of our dating adventures or romance adventures as mine's less dating now, more romance. I never stopped taking her on dates, my friend. And it sounds like you're doing. It's in there. It's in one of the principles of the relationship element of Hero Academy is date nights, date nights, date nights. We can find you on Twitter, yeah. A dating dad. We can indeed at a dating dad on Twitter, search on Instagram, search on any social media platform, and I might be there. But if I am there, I'll be under that name, a dating dad. And all good pub cubicle walls.

50:08 Bring back graffiti. That's what I say. And yeah, I'm Johnny Jensen, Team Superdad. TeamSuperdad.com forward slash group. You can come and be part of the Team Super Dad crew. We would love to have you there with us. Until next week, Glenn, be well, stay bright. Love to the family. Seeing your mum, I can't wait to hear how that goes. Looking forward to it as well, man. I'll see you next Monday. Take it easy. Bye. This has been Team Super Dad. Find us at TeamSuperdad.com. Join the program and create the best life ever for you and your children.

50:49 You are not alone. You're on Team Super Dad.