Is Your Lack Of Self Awareness A Lethal Weapon?

00:00 Anyone who's got a lack of self-awareness is literally walking around like a gun ready to go off, like a ticking time bomb basically. Welcome to The Jonnie Jensen Show, where modern dads discover how to create the true riches relationships and results they deserve. Get your High Value Man blueprint and join our community at highvaluemanproject.com Let's go! Welcome to The Jonnie Jensen Show my name is Jonnie Jensen I am the founder and head coach of The High Value Man Project it is great to have you here today whether you're watching on the live or you're listening to the podcast

00:43 It is my absolute pleasure. Today's topic of self-awareness, a lethal weapon And yes, the answer is yes. Anyone who's got a lack of self-awareness is literally walking around like a gun ready to go off like a ticking time bomb basically it's a skill its level of sophistication It's a measure of you as a high value man that you are self aware and in today's I will give you examples of times when i really wasn't that self-aware or perhaps a really didn't give a shit about. I might have been self aware but it didn't care so, I guess there's another dynamic to is being self aware and having the degree of responsibility that you actually care about how your showing up and that is a core theme inside The High Value Man Project we are modern dads generally over 40s men

01:44 Successful in our business but struggling with the way that life is panning out at home. We're feeling overworked, under sex frustrated and it It isn't just about how other people or the circumstances that are going on. It's about you taking responsibility for yourself, the change that you wish to see in others normally starts with you but we have it round the opposite way We're frustrated, we're waiting for someone else to be different, we're waiting for someone else to change and when they don't we get more despondent or we get more frustrated That's where mental health challenges turn up

02:20 For men under 50, suicide is one of the highest killers. In particular men between 40 and 50 it pretty much is the highest cause of death and its a mental health condition which we can attack which we can fix By creating the life that we deserve and not a life that we feel stuck in. And self-awareness is part of that if you're ready to level up, if you want to be part of The High Value Man project then I invite you to either join The High Value Man group at jonniejensen.com forward slash group or book yourself on to a 15 minute high value man introduction call

03:02 And you can do that at join.highvaluemanproject.com forward slash one five call I think I should make a shorter URL for that but basically if you drop the drop by comment in the air wherever you're watching this then i will get back to you hashtag man and you'll get the high value man blueprint really just whatever it takes for you to get hold of me then we've got your back here How could you possibly remember me telling you like five different things to do? Let me tell you, if you go to JonnieJensen.com forward slash group that will put you into our free community on Facebook and we'll get you everything that you need! So the High Value Man process from 3XC formula for living clarity courage and commitment

04:03 So you might say, well where does self-awareness fit into those three areas? Well the answer is it's pretty much across them all. It is a core... Is self awareness a core value? I think it probably is. It might not get expressed like that. It might come out as integrity. It might come out as respect. It might come out as generosity. Might be about communication. You know, it really is A value of tidiness or timeliness. Self-awareness is recognizing that you have an impact wherever you go, how you show up what you say to people when you're happy when you're sad when you're drunk when you're trying to make a point self awareness is the ability for you to slow down time in the moment

05:05 And both see what you're about to do and how it's gonna land on the other person because that's a degree of responsibility where you start to have real power, real power everywhere. I did this course at Landmark once and they did this powerful exercise Where you sat with the partner and back and forth between the two of you, just simply repeated I'm creating you creating me creating you creating me creating you creating me. And it's like a lot of these kind of exercises is only when you've been doing it for five minutes that you start to actually get the point of exercise and you could see in the other persons expression

05:52 That your uncomfortableness or you smiling, or you fidgeting, you giggling, you like scowling. Like if you were tense the other person responds to that whether they're even aware of it or not they pick up on it and this is the most subtle level of self-awareness You know I used to love...I used to talk about it in fact when I became really self aware one of the things I became aware of is that I used to love It's probably more when I was younger, but I think I'm more in control of it now. I used to love to throw these little social grenades you know fire off these little comments that were perhaps a little bit challenging that were perhaps a little bit shocking maybe? Perhaps they were extra...I don't know it wasn't like I was writing off

06:49 One sex over the other or one race over that. I mean, we're not talking about things like that but you know just things... I can't even think of an example! Maybe it's just about being loud you know? But being the one who wanted to be noticed and how you do that is either by the volume that you speak or the things that you say And the thing about that is that without self-awareness You're likely repeating the same old mistakes wondering why things don't work out You might think you're great at communication but if others see you as closed off then your experience of them is, well no one helps me out. No one tells me what's going on so you start to get the arsehole with other people and go around life frustrated but it actually comes back to you and if you can't see your own blind spots right then they become

07:51 Holes, potholes, pit holes. They become potholes that you're... well they become barriers that you're about to crash headlong into and the reason they are called blind spots is because you can't see them but you have to be able to take a moment actually notice That could be that you ask other people it could be that you take of a period of to reflect Journaling is a great way to develop your level of self-awareness It's an opportunity for you to reflect on the day, on the moment. And it's not like oh I'm going to write a diary dear diary today I did this did that...it can be about that if you want your journal to be about that but for me and in The High Value Man journaling program its really about getting your experience of the day down what worked what didn't work was my win? What was a challenge?

08:43 The patterns that start to occur there because when you start to see those patterns if you have taken on, if you've taken on taking on your own responsibility then when you observe those patterns your start to say why does that always turn out like that? Why...you know. If..if you're the.... Here's a good point should you can always reflect on is that wherever you go whoever you are with whatever you're doing there is always one person there And that only person is always there is you. So if situations always go the way they do, then it's unlikely all those different people's fault, if you want to call it be blaming but its unlikely anything to do with them It's how you show up and that's a level of self-awareness when you master it instead of that weapon being lethal, it becomes a tool for good

09:45 Conscious of how your words are coming out and how they might land with people so that you can put across to them emotions, that you can get the kind of response back that you want. That you can engage either one person or a whole room of people and get them To either empathize with you or to feel inspired by you, or come on whatever journey your mission is that you're asking them to come on. And that is the power of a high value man! That's the power of self-awareness so a couple of exercises that you could do we just talked about journaling if you comment hashtag man

10:31 On this video or drop it in the comments like you know send me a DM and I will give you access to the High Value Man Blueprint and the You 2.0 program which is a free short program which will highlight to you aspects of mindfulness and self-awareness such as journaling, asking other people have you ever done this? Have you ever done an audit where you've gone out to the people around you and you've asked them what am i like Like, like what do I do that works for you? What do I do that doesn't work for you. What's it like being around me and your job is not to be upset or shocked in fact your job is to create the space for them to be honest with you and how you create that space is that you're really okay with what they say You really take it on board because if you've asked someone who cares about you And you've given them the space to be truthful then what they say matters

11:35 And what you really need to say is, thank you. Thank you for the honesty you've just given me. Thank you for taking a risk in saying that to me I'm going to use that to work on myself and situations that aren't working for you if there's frustration in a relationship If there's somewhere your challenged In your health You know A level of self-awareness could be how you get up in the morning A level of self awareness could be what you drink at night A level of courage

12:15 In the 3XC, sorry inside of commitment in the three X because when you start to have a level of self-awareness where you realize that what your putting into your body what you're drinking what you eating how you exercising how much are sleeping and water drinking. How organized you are? How well you managing your money this isn't about turning your life upside down it's about having a level of control where everything works for you It's a level of self-awareness where you see, oh dear I seriously am not in control or oh yeah i have got this nailed. That is the degree of self awareness because when you have it going like that and you see somethings off You can be like ah! I want to shout at my kids for us being late to school today Or me being stuck in traffic after I've dropped them off because we left 20 minutes late

13:07 What actually, where's the level of self-awareness coming from there? Oh okay I need to get up early. I need their clothes to be ironed. I need to have the right cereal in the house whatever it is that's going on for you self awareness another word for it is taking responsibility so where is your self awareness off what's the impact on others who are you gonna ask and what are the actions you're gonna take as a result of both listening And of hearing what other people say to you. Get yourself into the High Value Man Project, we have lots of free resources inside the group at the risk of giving you a whole long list of things to do again just go to jonniejensen.com forward slash group and that will get you in I'll get you everything that will get you on the email list and i will serve you in the way that you need everything you are looking for to create the life that you deserve and not the life if you're stuck in

14:10 Okay guys, look forward to seeing you on the next episode. Let's go! Thanks for tuning in to The Jonnie Jensen Show Be sure to subscribe leave a review and share it with fellow dads Creating the life you deserve starts with YOU Get your High Value Man blueprint and join our community of motivated modern dads at highvaluemanproject.com