Ignite Your Masculine Energy with Fun Adventure and Friends

00:01 Welcome to the Team Superdad podcast. Are you having enough fun? Yes, you need to ignite your masculine energy with fun adventure and friends and if you're not having enough fun in your life well then you need to tune into today's episode. Roll theme! Welcome back to the Team Superdad podcast. It is great to have you here! it is in the morning in UK as always but you may be in the afternoon, evening

00:45 Oh, I don't know what ever it is. Perhaps you're awake at night trying to get to sleep and hopefully this isn't going to make you fall asleep! My name's Jonnie Jensen and i'm the host of the Team Superdad podcast. I'm also a dad coach and the founder of the Team Superdad community We are modern men creating the life that we desire, not a life that we feel stuck in. And it is about living with power about your masculine energy, about being the leader in your family, in your work, in your own life! So if you are one of those dads then make sure you're in our community get over to teamsuperdad.com forward slash group and if you're watching this and have other men mates friends

01:27 Brothers, sons in your life who need to see this then get sharing it right now. Hit that share button as we start on the lives of course if you're listening on the subscribe well share the podcast with your family and friends as well Today's episode we are talking about reward. The fun, the R&R relaxation time basically the quality time that you create for yourself in your life that are in the power code is the top of our pyramid of our triangle a lot of power in triangles coach Wooden's

02:03 Triangle, is it triangle of success? I love coach Woodham. I've read lots of his books and watched his videos the most successful college basketball coach of all time If you're a fan of Ted Lasso then you might have heard Heard it referenced It's on the wall if you look in Ted Lasso office In a frame on the wall You got Cote Woodhams I think he's called The Pyramid Of Success So yeah, go and check that out if you haven't. It's definitely I would count him as one of my mentors even though I don't know him clearly. And I've learned a lot from Coach Woodham

02:42 Where's that? Oh yeah, fun. Fun the pyramid right! Yeah purpose is the bottom of the pyramid ownership that is the ownership of your mind toxic energy versus positive energy The W for do the work engage which we've been talking about for the last couple of weeks That is the people in your life that matter the most Mentors, your family, your friends. Your relationship, your partner, your wife basically the people around you that influence you the most and then on to the final part of the whole Power Code process reward fun we also relaxation the time that you spend with yourself it doesn't matter how successful you are what you've created what you're working on where you're headed if you're not having enough

03:30 The Jonnie Jensen Show, Failing at your endeavor, but so long as the endeavor is clear. So long as the direction you're headed in is clear then actively pursuing that goal well that's the essence of fulfillment having a clear direction and actively pursuing it is the essence of fulfillment and so as Winston Churchill said going from failure to failure without any loss of enthusiasm That's the definition of success

04:18 Having fun along the way is absolutely vital. It's what men do best, you know? Being able to be working hard slogging your guts out being in the flipping trenches being down a coal mine like being on an oil rig like trying to think of tough environments okay or being an exhausted dad right if you can't find reasons to laugh and relax Then you are not only going to burn yourself out, but what's the point? Where is the essence of life and through some of my tough times. My dad has said to me in the past problem is son I'm just not sure you're having enough fun definitely as a couple more swear words in that there's definitely a couple more swear words In most sentences my dad says so but she get the point right So The thing

05:16 As men, and I've got two new dads have joined the power code this week right? And they're in the same boat. They're... well that's not true actually one of them is single going through a divorce the other one is a business owner he's a family man his relationship isn't quite what in fact all aspects of life aren't quite how he wants them to be but The Jonnie Jensen Show,

06:05 That it's all gonna work out for us. Like if I'm a good enough guy, it's all going to work out so as you've will have heard me reference so many times before Dr Robert Glover's book No More Mr Nice Guy this is the essence of being a nice guy is putting all your focus on everyone else hoping that it's gonna work out and then when it doesn't having nothing to fall back on And by the way, you could have it all working. Let's say you were having working in four out of the five areas of our F5 Focus Fitness Finance Family and Fun.

06:41 But if one of them really is struggling, then like any kind of toxic pollutant it will seep into other areas and drag you down. You can't have a broken relationship and expect to thrive at work and be smashing it in the gym or even your relationship with your children. If one part of it's broken—your health—if you've got constant back pain then it's going to impact the rest of your life. It just happens! And so Carving out time for fun in your life is absolutely vital. If you have nothing to look forward to, it's very much around the essence of fulfilment. Having things to look forward to gives you the motivation and drive and satisfaction of a tough day because you know you've got a fun weekend coming up or when you get home you're going to be able to actually relax. Too many men just don't even know how to relax! Or worse business successful people they'll go home

07:47 And they're so focused on work that simply sitting down, having a beer watching the match or even going out on a date with their wife. It occurs like guilt it occurs like a panic like I should be doing something else you'll find it with your kids as well supposed to be looking after the kid is supposed to be hanging out with them and you've got 75% of your attentions on your mobile phone dedicated quality time and your own fun fits into that Probably next week we'll talk about bucket lists and an adventure. But this week, okay? And it is that triangle you know understanding the at the top of it all at the end of the day The reward in the fun, celebrating your results Is what sets you up for the next day So let's talk about that relaxation part That's celebrating the results Actually rewarding yourself

08:51 If you plan your days, right? If you plan your weeks. if you've got a schedule again that's part of doing the work part of the power code then you will have a list of things that you were working on that week a set of actions or goals it's too easy in life to get to the end of the day and be fixated by what we haven't done in that day The irony is If you've got off your ass and actually done anything you were supposed to do, that you will have achieved things. And yet instead of feeling the reward of looking at what we've achieved, feeling happy that those emails went out or the podcast got edited

09:39 I'm thinking about what I've got to do today, right? That we optimize the YouTube video. Then will we get to part run maybe, maybe not given that the late start this morning after bloody stream yard problems But to focus on all the things that didn't get done and then to miss the fact that this did happen, that my daughter is going to cinema at lunchtime I'm gonna drop her off. That Jago and I are gonna get home and probably go to the park and do something ourselves They're the bits we did get done so getting to end of day and reflecting on that and taking stock of that

10:19 It triggers the dopamine effect in our brain, our reward center. Knowing that we achieved on what we set out to do triggers the reward center and if you don't do that... If you just focus on what didn't get done then you aren't going to get that hit, that dopamine hit that comes with achievement So that's why it's so important on just a micro level to get home at the end of the day and to sit and take 10 minutes for yourself. Whether it's a glass of wine, a cup of tea or walk the dog, jog like you have... It can't just be I've just got to walk with dog or I've just gotta go to gym. It's going to be a conscious moment where you sit and do that for yourself. And yes this is what I did today! And I am THE MAN!

11:12 Part of the reprogramming, the affirmation cycle in your mind. Okay? So that's the importance of celebrating your day and reviewing what you've achieved. Celebrating and rewarding yourself with a conscious moment. And by the way sitting down and watching football in the same way as playing with your kids if that's something that you get joy out of doing then actually do it! Don't sit there and feel guilty about doing it, and half do it. Actually give yourself that time and consciously notice I'm sat on the couch enjoying this because I worked my ass off for another eight hours of the day! Okay now planning for fun right?

12:01 In the same way as everything we've just spoken about in rewarding your day, if you've got plans down the line things that you're actively looking forward to then the sense of hopelessness or the resignation. Or is this as good as it gets? Like going round with a hamster wheel, the rat race whatever analogy you want to give yourself When you have, you'll know it yourself when you book a holiday. Suddenly when you book that holiday You feel better and so but don't leave it to only two weeks of the year. You need to make sure that your consciously carving out these opportunities these plans these events these things look forward too So date night with your wife or partner That is an essential activity to carry out each week For your relationship It's important to know

12:53 Inside of the stress and strain and exhaustion and busyness that you've got time together to look forward to. Your friends, too many of the men inside a Team Superdad they don't see enough with their friends it's not like they don't have any friends although when you don't see anyone for bloody months you get left with that idea I've got no one to turn to another vital reason why you have to be constantly in contact with your friends and planning For weekends away, for opportunities to see them. For lads holidays when you put those moments into your diary it gives you anchors like literally in your sanity that somewhere down the line somewhere next week somewhere next month we're doing this

13:43 And it gives your brain a release. It stops the stress and strain in one area, and allows you to go off to the other side, and be in a more creative relaxed enthusiastic excited place. So yeah like the holiday example... The moment you book a holiday you're looking forward to it but what else could you book? What about concerts and festivals and gigs These things are happening. We went to Mickey Flanagan last week at the O2, bloody brilliant! Very funny although the support act was absolutely shite. Absolutely unbelievable talk about like gauge the room I'm gonna talk about that in another live but yeah but anyway Mickey Flanagan was bloody brilliant but we bought those tickets six months ago so if you don't

14:40 Plan for these things and you're never going to get yourself there. Spontaneity, obviously great but if everything you do is spontaneous and last-minute then you don't trigger that thing we just spoke about in terms of being able to look forward to it by seeing it on your calendar about having a destination in mind down the line. Reward reward so laughter yes that's where I was coming onto laughter As creatures, we're one of the few animals. Now I'm not Terry Nutkins or Steve whatever his name is the Aussie that sadly died from a stingray bite but laughter is where are one of the few animals on earth as far as I know where we can just generate laughter now if you've ever done any laughter yoga sounds bloody strange but laughter yoga it's literally the act

15:43 Creating laughter. Like even now I can just, I'm sat here on my own recording this podcast and i've laughed or at least suggested that i'm laughing by making a laughing sound multiple times during this episode during this live. The brain is a dumb machine as well as being incredibly powerful when we trigger laughter Then all the feel-good chemicals that are associated with laughter get generated. So, laughter yoga in terms of a self regenerative process is the act of spending half an hour laughing! It's on my list of things to train in but I've done it in Brighton...I've done some with...oh I've forgotten his name

16:37 A guy I met on LinkedIn during lockdown. We've done a few sessions together, few lives together as well but if you're not having reasons to laugh then you're missing out on all those feel-good chemicals that come with the act of laughing so where how do you laugh? Well you can just make up a reason to laugh! You can think back on a happy memory, you can look at old photos, episodes of friends or Seinfeld I don't know, whatever else you used to watch that you find funny. Fawlty Towers? What's new? Oh Ted Lasso! Be tuned into things that make you laugh because if you're not then like any habit you'll just find yourself laughing less and less

17:25 The, the dopamine, the endorphins. The positive feel good chemicals that come from laughter you'll be missing out on and this whole subject around reward is about those that feel good The Jonnie Jensen Show, Jonnie Jensen

18:12 Joy, whether that's too much booze. Too much porn. Too much gambling. Too much sniff. Any of these things that are a distraction you're looking for that hit of fun Well the hit of fun can be created at any time in any place either at the end of your day Either by planning weekends with with your mates looking forward to date nights scheduling things with your children so it is quality time Finding reasons to laugh every day, booking holidays. You know Christmas and birthday or New Year you know they're coming round so why not have a birthday party planned? Why not have a new year's eve party planned? Why not be in contact with all your old friends whether it be schoolmates uni mates work mates like why can't you

19:01 The beating heart of your own social circle. Guess what? No one else is coming for you! The amount of fun that you have in your life, as well as being vital is also on you so put it together look at the next 12 weeks look at the next 12 months make sure that you have got plans to look forward too So that next time we're sat here talking about this You've got memories to look back on And remember, like everything we do in Team Superdad this is the example that you'll set in your children. How do you want them to speak about you? How do you want them to remember your childhood as a stressed out boring fat bastard or as the dad that had it all and created constant regular reasons to laugh That is the essence of living with power! That is the R in the Power Code Pyramid Let me know in the comments let me know

20:04 In the Team Superdad community, what fun are you up to this weekend? What have you got planned? Are you watching the FA Cup with your mates? Is it Champions League final next weekend. Are you going paddle boarding? No not going paddle boarding! It's bloody... when is the sun coming?! 3rd of June are you kidding me!? But yeah what are you up to? What do you find in...? What is making you laugh this week As always, get yourself over to TeamSuperDad.com forward slash group to be part of that community and in terms of living with power, getting the power code in your life being part of the coaching program, the group of men who are actively working with me to create a life they desire and to be the man and dad their family needs then go

20:52 Go to teamsuperdad.com forward slash 15 call and that will book you in to have a conversation with me about what you're working on, what do you want out of life and how the Power Co can help you make it happen? Remember to share this podcast, share this live! And I'll see you next week on the next episode of The Team Super Dad Podcast. Team Super Dad Out This has been Team Superdad. Find us at teamsuperdad.com Join the program and create the best life ever for you and your children! You are not alone, you're on Team Superdad