How Not To Go Speed Dating - The Wrap Up 49

00:00 Welcome. Yes, it is that time of the week and you are here with Team Super Dad. It's great to have you on board for the wrap-up role theme. Welcome to Team Super Dad. Real dads creating their best lives ever. More time, more money, more fun. You are not alone. You're on Team Super Dad. Hello, Glenn. Good evening. Welcome to yourself and to everybody joining us here on the wrap-up. How the devil are you, young man? I'm really good. I'm really good. Good to hear you. Good to hear you. Sitting back, getting ready for a quick chat.

00:45 Yes, mate. Yes, mate. The wrap-up. It's our weekly jaunt through all things the last seven days. Glenn, aka Dating Dad on Twitter and myself, Johnny Jensen, creator and founder of Team Super Dad and the Hero Academy program. We are dads, modern dads, sorting out the world so you don't have to. We've given ourselves that lofty position, Glenn. Really, anything you want to decide about yourself, you can put it in the description of a podcast or a YouTube video. And that is who you are, basically, to the world. I'm glad that it's me making the description and not other people.

01:24 The mean words that people say about me on the internet would not be safer work for most instances. I know. I went to a conference thing in LA in JT Fox. JT Fox. I've heard of Michael J. Fox. Yeah, this guy's called JT Fox. He's like a pretty much self-proclaimed dude. And it was a good event. It was fun. I got a photo with Sylvester Stallone and another photo with Al Pacino. But, and in fact, I'll tell you all about this at this event because it's quite funny. But they had a guy on there and he was like, it's a cross between influencer marketing, social media, making money online and stuff.

02:09 So they had this guy on there and he was the US's number one tipster. And he's called Wayne something, right? But he said, do you know how I became known as America's number one tipster? Tell me, Wayne. He goes, I just started calling myself it. I started banging out press releases and requests to be on TV shows and Wayne, whatever his name is, number one tipster. And then so people just started calling him it. It's like, okay. True. He's mad. But people, you believe the reality which you're told. It's kind of a Truman show thing.

02:50 We're going back there. People believe what you say about them. It's why my kids believe I'm a competent parent. It's the only way to do it. You just say you know what you're doing and by God, people believe it. So if they come down Monday and find you sat in your own piss and shaved half your beard off and three bottles of empty whiskey around you, that will break the space-time continuum for them for them all. For the kids? No, they'll just say, dad, come on. It's a school day. Come on. Get ready. Well, listen, for anyone joining us for the first time, I can see people coming online. We've got some comments coming in already.

03:35 Nadine, she says, Supermum here. Good to have you, Nadine. Look at that. Hey, Nadine. Nadine says, Monday, do super mums do Mondays? Super mums do every day twice. I think so. For the record, I do have the URL Team Supermum. And I have a big vision of Team Super Mum happening. Not because it has to, but because I want it to. I never wanted this to be an only men thing. It's not like dads are brilliant and mums are not. Definitely on the opposite, the opposite end of that spectrum.

04:16 There's a lot of single parent groups. For anyone not been on the show before, Glenn and I are both separated. So if you like the phrase single dad, single parent, we are that. I'm not a big fan of that, that single dad, single. It's got a lot of connotations with it. And it's sort of people polarize around. It gets a bit toxic. It's a bit shit really. Yeah, people, oh, bless. Oh, it's sad, isn't it? But basically, every time I mention I'm a single dad, the first thing I can see behind their eyes is, what did you do? How did you fuck this up? And yeah, oh, it's fine. You've only got them for the weekends. Then you can get back to your... No, single dad, dad.

04:59 That's what I am dead. I just happen to also be single. Yes, exactly. Big distinction there. Uh, Nadine says she's got a mate she can introduce you to us too. That's good. Well, we are open to all offers. Only me, John. Johnny is very much taken. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry, categories of offers. We have categories in the offers wheel. Uh, the romance category is uh closed for me uh at present and quite possibly for a while, actually, foreseeable future. Um, uh, but yeah, uh, TV appearances, um, large cash, uh, payments for minimal effort.

05:42 Um, what else would I do? Uh, this set of offers for uh, oh, but probably my best offer ever was, would you like to free go out with like a free holiday to be on TV and to get matched with the partner of your dreams? Um, well, that was yes, I mean, that seems like a wonderful combination of words, I've got to say. Yeah, that's how I ended up on the villa, yeah. Uh, before we forget, right, what are we doing here, right? This is this is the Team Super Dad podcast, the wrap-up. We do, we intend to do two podcasts a week, and one of them is like a value, lots of interesting stuff, useful things, things to make money, manage your mindset,

06:23 um, get fit, uh, be a better parent, have more fun, um, really to just help us on our way. I learned a lot of stuff the hard way, right? And uh, as I was piecing myself back together after the flipping separation and all that, I was like, what if I'd known all this beforehand? What if all the things I've read and learned, the people, the experiences, the coaches, the courses, what if I'd known all this up front? What would it have been like? It's like, it would have been fucking brilliant. Listen to yourself, and a lot of those people would you've actually listened to yourself, though? Would you uh the future version of you goes back to teach you? You're like, no, what are you talking about? You're an old man, you don't you don't know what it is like, okay, you've forgotten what it was like, like Biff in uh

07:09 give you the almanac. Without a sporting event, you would have to just some sort of level of proof to say you actually know what's going to happen. Yeah, yeah, Nadine, have you been drinking, Nadine? First of all, bloody good to have your comments, Nadine. We do enjoy the comments. Uh, not always, some not every week we get comments. So, if you are watching um, LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitch, uh, not on Twitter anymore, thanks to them turning that off, but um, Facebook, of course, then we'll welcome your comments. And if I see them, because that's always a challenge, it's forgetting them there. I will read them out. If you are a dad, if you know a dad, a dad who wants to create the life he desires, not a life who feels stuck in fitness focus, finance, family, and fun, then come on over to the TeamSuperDad community.

07:55 We would love to have you there. That is teamsuberdad.com forward slash group. And that's free. We welcome you in. We'll chat, help, support, laugh, joke, whatever it takes. And not just people who want help as well, sometimes people who can give help. You know, it's a team. And sometimes you need leaders, some you need followers, you need all positions available in a team. So if you've got some, if you know a dad who's you think, actually, you know what, he's a he's a really good dad, send him over, let him share the knowledge. Well, that is uh gold. Stuart, uh, Stuart, Stuart, Stuart. No, ah, bollocks.

08:35 The guy I had on the podcast the other day. Um, he's him and I become like we chat basically. It'd be helpful if I remember his name. Stuart Roberts. I always struggle. If someone's got a first name and a second name that is two first names, that always throws me. One of my best mates called Matt Laura. Stuart Roberts has in two first names. Stuart Roberts. He was on the board. Never trust him. I just want to be anonymous. Listen, we've got to just check back in with Nadine because Nadine has put herself forward. She's going to be on the next live chat with us. Nadine, you'd actually be very welcome. We are totally open to that. So next Monday, oh no, next Monday's the 50th show, Nadine. We're just working out what we're going to do for that.

09:20 But the wrap-up 51, Nadine, you are more than welcome. Let's chat. I'll circle back around and pick you up. Hey, honey. What are you doing here? We'd love to have you, Nadine. That'd be bloody brilliant. Yeah, mums are welcome. Good mums. Good mums. Mums are welcome. People. Here's the classic thing, right? People get this idea that there's no good people about. This is what really annoys me. be honest, I went uh speed dating a couple of days ago at the weekend because I was meant to be going out day drinking.

10:01 And uh, people I was going day drinking with let me down, they couldn't do it for whatever reason. I thought, you know, I want to go out, I've not been out for ages, so I'm going out. So, I went speed dating and I popped it online on Twitter. Um, and the amount of people who were just like giving me not giving me abuse, but giving speed dating abuse, um, and just not being up for it and not wanting to do it, and and those sort of things. It's like, how are you going to have lunch? How are you going to now? Where do we start? What did I interrupt you on saying? Because there was a point. No, much like Dory. Uh, you know, here's the thing: the reason I've forgotten is because you've talked about speed dating, and my brain has taken me back to the experiences I've had of speed dating, which in itself is a story, of course, because most subjects I've got a bizarre

10:48 experience to share on that on that subject, as regular listeners to the podcast will know. Um, so yeah, I will tell you my bizarre speed dating story. What I can say about speed dating is it is as shit as it is brilliant makes it worth the experience. Oh, that was what it was. Everyone's going on, oh, there's no good people at speed dating, there's no good people, there's no good people will turn up. And I'm sitting there thinking, Well, you turned up, and you think you're a good person, so therefore, there's a good chance that other people who think they're good people will also be turning up. It's like the fact that you exist proves that you're not impossible as a person, and there's loads of people out there who are just like you who might turn up as well.

11:33 It might be shit, might be amazing, probably somewhere in between. But the fact that you exist and you're awesome means other people can be awesome too. Yeah, people that say there's no good people in the world, or there's no, there's no decent blokes out there. Like, there's every chance that there's at least as many good blokes as there are bad blokes, surely, or there's at least as many the idea that there's everyone's shit. Maybe you're just good at finding shit people. How about that? I think there's a law or something. I'm going to try and type about it as we go. You know, one of these like Murphy's Law or that sort of thing. Uh, there is a law which basically says, um, most people think they're above average, and that's not how averages work.

12:18 It's like there's a basic concept: there's that most people and are in there, and the average is the average, and then you can't have most of you above average because then the average would just go up a little bit. So, yeah, most people overestimate their abilities in almost every way, shape, and form. I know I'm one of those. I think I'm competent. I think I'm competent. I think I hope I'm competent. I'm like a wing in a prayer. I'm pretty sure I'm competent, and on that basis, I'm going for it. Well, it's like it's like in the army, you're in charge until someone more in charge comes along, basically.

13:00 And until someone tells me I'm not competent, I'm gonna take the best part of my Dunning-Kruger curve and just try and live in that first bit. Um, you're familiar with Dunn-Kruger. No, it sounds like I'm familiar with Kruder and Dorfmeister to the two kind of uh chill house uh DJ producers and stuff. Nadine says she's going to come and sort us two out, and I'm going to have a cuddle. Well, my good lady Jo actually has been sorting me out and does give an exceptional cuddle. Um, but uh, depending on what other categories you can sort us out in, Nadine, you're very welcome.

13:35 Um, yeah, but that's the point I'm saying is, and we're going to come. I do want to find out about this cruder, cruder dude, is there are lots of good people in the world, and the more you believe there's good people in the world, the more likely you're going to attract those people. You're more likely going to find yourself in going to a networking event or a party and be convinced that everyone in there is going to be shit. You're going to come across as a bit like sketchy as you go in, a bit of a bit of a naysayer, a bit of a party pooper, and no one wants to be around that. So, then guess what? You prove yourself right that no one's friendly. Well, that's because you've got like flipping kiss of death written on your forehead,

14:14 you're miserable. It is scary, you're right. It is about being the person you want to be, and it's amazing how that kind of attracts more people like you. And you'll find, you know, misery loves company, but so does joy. You know, people who are sad attract more sad people to them. People who are happy attract happy people, and it's not universal. And there's obviously caveats and circumstance. But generally speaking, if you're a positive person, you end up surrounding yourself with other positive people because you just vibe. And so, if you're if you're surrounding yourself with people who are bringing you down, it might be something that you can think about yourself. What am I doing? that might attract those people to my life? And thinking, oh, what can I do to change that? Yeah, my mind is going back to a night in Brighton.

14:58 We had been out partying, okay? So we were pretty cut in multiple ways. There was about 10-15 of us. And we bowled into this pub. I don't even remember the name, but it's on the corner in the North Lanes, heading up towards the station. And we bowled in there thinking something was going to be on and it wasn't on. But we were already there. We bought a drink. And so we were way louder than anyone else in the pub. And then my former girlfriend, Emma, she found a roll of, you know, that electrical tape. Oh, yeah, stretchy, very sticky. But it was, I guess it could be sex tape.

15:42 I've not had that experience, but now I know what to use for sex tape. I could possibly have that experience. So I'm pretty sure Jack ended up sweet talking to DJ and turning it up much louder. Emma's now going around the pub, giving everyone like headbands and ninja bracelets and this sort of stuff. The whole place was going off simply because we'd wandered in there accidentally midway through a crazy weekend. And anybody can bring that. But if you're one of those people who goes into a parenting group and starts moaning about how shit your life is, well, all you're going to get is a load of people going, oh, yeah, it is, isn't it?

16:25 What's up? I totally agree. Tell me about this bell curve Kruger and Dorf Meister. Dunning Kruger. Dunning Kruger. So I am going to share my screen so that you can actually see this. I don't think I've ever shared any of my screens on this. This is screen sharing cherry. And it comes. I've pressed all the buttons, so hopefully you can see this. Look how serious that is. We need to put like a block of balls in the corner or something. Honestly, this is such this is such one of those things when I learned it. I won't say changed my life, but certainly it was light bulbs, right?

17:06 Dunning-Kruger effect. Now, this is something whereby you've got two scales. On the X-axis is where you know nothing about something right the way through to actually you're a guru, you know everything about it. And then on the Y-axis is how confident you are. So at the bottom is no confidence whatsoever. On the top is high confidence. And what you'll see if you can see the screen, if not, then you'll just have to visualize the graph. At the start of something, when you know basically nothing about it, you go up what's called the peak of Mount Stupidity. You've got high confidence because you don't know all the stuff you don't know. As far as you know, this is skiing's easy. I can go down a hill and it's straightforward. And your confidence is high. Then you usually break a bone.

17:48 And you realize actually, as the more you learn about something, the less you know about it because you're learning about all the other areas that you know nothing about. And you start going down into this valley of despair thinking, I'm rubbish. I don't know anything about this. I've got really low confidence. And it's only if most people, when they're starting a new hobby or starting a new lifestyle, trying out with something or making a change, they go up the peak of Mount Stupidity when they've got all their enthusiasm and stuff. Then it goes a bit wrong and they realize they go into the valley of despair and they stop doing it. And they think I'm rubbish. It's only those people who just persevere and just work on it, work on it, spend more time, get better, who actually go up this slope of enlightenment.

18:31 I did not make up these names to the plateau of sustainability. And you have to stick through with something. You have to go through the learning curve. It doesn't all just go straight up like a hockey stick. It goes up, then it goes down and then along. You have to go through the valley of despair unless you're going to get somewhere proper. And that is the Dunning-Kruger effect. And you'll see it every time you introduce someone to a new skill or topic. They'll be really enthusiastic at the start. Then they'll get less enthusiastic when they realize how little they know. And then as they get better, they'll start realizing, you know what, this is okay. I can do this. I want to see a picture of Dunning and Kruger, all right? Are they professors with like monocles and top hats, or do they look like Cheech and John?

19:16 That's a good question. That's a good question. I genuinely don't know what they look like. These are 1896 Donner and Kruger or 1967 on a hippie commune. I think that's more likely, to be fair. Absolutely. But yeah, I love all these little bits of little bits. Yeah. You give like. clever stupid is where you got where you're just really excited about something, you don't know any better, you just go for it and uh and and you have it, you have instant success because you just

19:56 bloody annoys me, right? There's there's a bloke I got chatting to about a year ago. He created a group called Punk Rock Dads. He hit some sort of sweet spot around the start of lockdown and stuff. And so he instantly had 4,000 members in this group called Punk Rock Dads. So now he's messaging me saying, How do I manage this? What do I do? I thought he was taking a piss. I was like, I forget what I thought he was doing. And he goes, no, honestly, I just started this thing last week for a bit of fun and I've now got 4,000 members. There must have been no group for punk rock dads on Facebook.

20:36 And then he made one and it was literally Field of Dreams. Create it and then she'll come. Did you see? I've got a look at this up. I was just the New York Yankees played a game last week in a cornfield. Oh, Field of Dreams style. Celebrate the 30th anniversary of the movie. And Kevin, Kevin Costner pitched the place. Here we go. Kevin Costner leads Yankees and White Sox from a cornfield. So they pretty much went back to the area, cut the field. They made the bloody movie, right?

21:18 They had 6 million people watch the game. Highest ever, in modern day terms, highest viewing of a game. It's pretty damn impressive. Yeah. And I think I seem to remember someone talking about it saying, actually, it was like a really good game. And I don't know what these words mean, but something like it was settled on the bottom of the ninth. Whatever like bottom of the ninth. That's like, that's like Hollywood. It's like literally, there's the game is tied. You're going into the ninth. And the cool thing for me is the Chicago White Sox are playing the Yankees. My family in Chicago, they've got like a bit of a split. There's a couple, a few cluster who are White Sox fans.

22:03 White Sox are Southside and the rest of them are the Cubs. And for a time, the White Sox have been better than the Cubs. Then the Cubs won the World Series a couple of years ago. And it's a bit like, oh, have you noticed we've got different. I did notice that. Yeah. I've pressed the. Oh, no, it's because we had the thingy Bob shared. We had the screen share. We did have the screen share going. We've never done that before. We haven't. We haven't. And just while I'm on a screen share tick, this is whatever his name, David Dunning. It's not quite a 19th century monocle. As Dunning, and this is Justin Kruger.

22:48 Look like lovely gentlemen. They're just really quite sensible, you know, American psychologists, sort of doctors. Archetypal professor. Yeah, yeah. Okay, well, if we could. Someone either knows that they've got a wild side, wants to send us some pictures in, that'd be great. Or failing that, and they're a good Photoshop person, take those pictures that we just shared, jazz them up into some kind of wild, funky, acid, 60s hippie, stoned moment where they came up with this. And even if you're not, I'm on the pleadow. I'm on the pedo at the moment.

23:25 And even if you're not a good Photoshop artist, try it anyway, because at first you'll be really confident and then you might get a little bit shit and then you'll dip down into the valley of despair. But just persevere and keep layering stuff on until it looks good. Yeah. This is a perfect segue back into speed dating because I had a rule about speed dating, right? So when I, so I mentioned Emma before, right? Awesome woman, one of the funnest, funnest women I've ever known, right? So I had a good time, dated for a few years, broke up. But after that, I was trying to piece myself back together. Hadn't dated for sort of four years and was never that good at it in the first place.

24:09 Now I found myself around the early 30s thinking, holy cow, how do I do this? So the obvious thing was let's go speed dating. I was quite daunted by the whole idea of it. I didn't really have a wingman to go with. So I decided that I would have to go three times because if I went once and it was good, that might have been a one-off freak occurrence. Equally, if I went once and it was shit, well, how do I know I did just not pick a bad speed dating event? Why should I write off all speed dating events simply because one was. was bad i need to go to three best of three whoever multiple data points yeah i like it if it was good twice it was okay if it was bad twice so

24:51 it was weird and crazy and so the first one was pretty boring and didn't really get any any matches the second one again a bit weird Well, the weird thing about speed dating is as you get around to the sort of later tables, obviously people have had a few drinks and then they start saying things like, have you met the weird bloke with the top hat on yet? Or like, have you met, have you sat with Sue? Sue's like old, way up, like really old. And she's got bad, like, there's like the kind of the room takes on a life of its own. You start to hear things before you get to them. It's like a roller coaster.

25:32 But the second time I went, I did get matched with someone and it went a bit weird. Turned out she was also from Maidstone. And this is where I should have realized red flags are an important thing to take note of, right? Red flags are an important thing to take note of. Not that people who work in Pizza Hut or it's anything wrong with them, whatever, but she told me how she worked in Pizza Hut. She also told me where she came from, which wasn't the best part of town, but she would like kind of move to Brighton and started a whole new life and stuff. Then we went out and got very drunk on a Tuesday night and ended up basically in the walkabout.

26:15 I mean, that's a classy evening, if ever I heard it. So, and obviously, Tuesday night wasn't very busy, and we were there like then it's time to say goodbye. So I put her in her taxi and I said, yeah, take it easy. Had a snog, like that was fun, off you go. So the taxi pulls away, then the taxi stops. Then she leans out the taxi and says, why don't you come back? So I'm like, okay. So I got in the taxi and I kind of made it clear to her, like, yes, this is cool, but don't think I'm coming back expecting anything because I kind of wanted to be a gentleman, set expectations. I was also a bit scared, to be honest.

26:54 Oh, man, if a woman's inviting you to go back, just enjoy your evening. No, I know, but that's where I fell short in all my dating escapades. I wasn't the who's the man that the Barney, Barney, how I met your mother. Who actually, I think is there's a whole separate conversation. I think he's one of the most complex and well-written characters in all of sitcom history, but that's a whole different discussion for a whole nother day. Who Barney Rubble? No, not Barney Rubble. Barney from How I Met Your Mother. Very, very different combinations of characteristics there. So no, I don't have a lot of confidence in. I'm not the like the Shiron. Is it Shirano de Bergerac or whatever? I'm not like the confident lover, you know.

27:38 So we, so we go back to house. I've already put like this kind of set some sort of safe space. So then we get there. And then so she, so it's like late. We're already blind drunk. So she opens a bottle of wine. I'm like, okay, well, I'm not even sure I like wine that much. So no sooner have we started to drink the wine than she kind of throws herself on me. So now we're snogging, still dressed and stuff. She's kind of dry humping me, right? And my brain is a little bit like, you know, in the cartoons when they get the devil and the angel and or like Ali McBeal where she kind of imagines things or or

28:17 Alan Partridge where he has those kind of flashbacks and he's dancing there in his leather pants and stuff like that, right? So my brain does the same sort of thing. So there's one part of me going, this is a bit mad. And the other part's going, shut up, this is great. Go with the flow, right? So next thing. So it feels like it's moving and progressing, right? So I go and I unclip her bra in the kind of magic one-handed move, right? And she freaks out. Bearing in mind, she's got her hands down my pants and stuff, right? She freaks out and starts screaming at me and then says, get out. Like literally, so literally throws me. I was like, I don't know where I am.

29:01 I don't know. She goes, I don't give a fuck. Get out. I was like, whoa. And I lost my jacket out of it. I lost like a 90 quid jacket out of it. She literally was like one of those touch me, don't touch me. I think it was a plan all along. She just wanted your jacket. It was pale blue. Actually, but I think back to that jacket, it was absolutely rancid. But I thought it was pretty cool at the time. So maybe you could be right. Maybe she wanted a pale blue jacket. So yeah, speed dating, Maidstone, rough area, Pizza Hut, Brighton, Walker. walkabout, drunk, touch me, don't touch me, freak out, get out. And there I am walking home in the rain going, that was bonkers. Yeah, it sounds it.

29:45 I've not had anything like that after a speed dating thing, to be honest. Most of mine have just been okay, but mildly disappointing. I didn't get a single match. There were 20 women there. And I don't looking around the room, I know I wasn't the worst of the options available. We'll just say that. And you don't expect anything. You don't deserve anything. But I was just surprised that out of the entire room, not a single match. So, yeah, maybe I've just got to up my chat game. Maybe I just don't have enough words to say in the right order. No, I think you're wrong, Glenn. I don't think the problem lies with you. I think the problem lies with their

30:23 gone speed dating with all the wrong intentions and agenda. The idea is to meet someone, not meet a husband or not go for a sex party orgy or whatever. But out of the 20 people, surely you want to, like a quiz show. Surely you want to make it through to the to the next round. Next round, yeah. Yeah, absolutely. So yeah, it's not, it's never going to put me. Pick one, at least humour the organizer. Yeah, I think it's not put me off, and I will definitely do it again. I've done it loads, and I'll end up doing it again. But there will come a stage where I'll think, I'm literally only going to go to this because I'm having a night out. I know that nothing's going to happen. How many... Did you get, were you boozy?

31:08 No, no, no. I mean, the guy next to me, he was, I don't know how much he'd had before we started, but after about five conversations, I could see him slurring. He was getting slower and slower to move on to the next person because he'd not got the words out properly. How many minutes did you get? Because that's one of the variables. Four minutes. Four minutes. There were about 20 people. And on the scale of sort of hop this, were there any hotties there? Yeah, absolutely. There were some, because obviously you've got two things. You've got a physical attraction, not attraction, that's the wrong way. You've got kind of physical beauty and then interesting as an individual. And so you can have loads of people who are really physically attractive, but actually are boring.

31:53 Loads of people who are not that attractive, but really interesting. And every combination of those two things. So what you're obviously after, the interesting, attractive people and whatever you find attractive, of course. And there were definitely enough there that I was thinking, you know what? If she said yes on me, I'd definitely be interested in going out and getting another drink afterwards. Yeah, the next round. It's like Takeshi's Castle. You've got to get through to the next round. This is the whole thing. That for me, a first date is never an actual date. A first date is your representative meeting my representative. We're both on best behavior. We're both testing the waters, checking to make sure they're not just after my jacket, that sort of thing.

32:35 That's standard practice. Otherwise, you end up losing some very interesting clothing. And so it's only after that you start getting to know people and getting relaxed and get into it. And that's where the fun begins. People just, I don't know whether they just want perfection right out of the box. And if they don't get it, they're not interested. In four minutes. In four minutes, exactly. I can do a lot in four minutes. Have you got a go-to question? Have you got a primer, a real good starter question? No, no, no, no. It varies massively depending on a person. And it has to, you know, like within seconds, within fractions of a second of sitting down, whether you're going to get on enough to have an interesting conversation. And so if you haven't, then you go back onto the dry questions. What do you do for a living?

33:20 Where do you live? All that sort of shit. But are you delayed at snakes? If you get that, that instant bit of connection, then it just flows. The conversation just goes and you don't even script. There's nothing in there. And you just end up, with some people, I've ended up making stuff up with them and like daring them to be pretending that they're professional badminton players or something like that. And you just end up getting into a bit of rapport because all you're trying to do is be memorable. Not all I'm trying to do is be memorable enough for those that I'm interested in so that afterwards, if I go up to them at the bar, they'll spend a couple of minutes talking to me at least.

34:01 And we can actually gauge whether there is any sort of connection. And was this in London or Maidstone? This was Mayfair in London. Really, really nice place. It was a converted church. And so we were in a wine cellar downstairs, steaming hot, but wine cellar downstairs, every arch had a different thing. So one was a wine bar, one arch was a craft beer. But then upstairs, as well as terraces and stuff, in the big kind of where the congregation, the choirs would have sang, that was all bar. bars with restaurants around the outside. And upstairs with like a food hall, um, all around the edges. So you just go there, you'd have drinks, you'd grab some food. It's a sort of place you could have just hung out for the whole day, and a beautiful stained glass window at one end of the room as well.

34:44 It was, it was a church, and they'd kept all the best bits of it. Yeah, so kind of place where you can get steaming drunk. Probably not. Mayfair, former church, speed dating, mate. It was five pounds a pint. That was you don't get that in London almost anywhere, let alone in the West End. No, you're saying cheap, a good price, yeah, ridiculously cheap for where you're in London. Amazing. So you can just hang out there and just drink and eat all day long. Not as cheap as Wetherspoons. No, but that means you're in a Weatherspoons. So I'd quite happily pay the extra whatever I needed to pay.

35:24 We had breakfast in Spoons yesterday. The kids were desperate to go out for breakfast and they're not. I mean, to be fair, Wetherspoons is so cheap for breakfast and eggs, bacon, beans, you know, toast, coffee. Hard to mess it up, you know. It's standard fare, you know, it has its place. And if it wasn't for the batshit mental views of the owner and founder, I'd have a greater love for it, but he's just a scumbag. Who the man who owns Wetherspoons? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm assuming you can hear me now, but yeah.

36:11 I don't even have to say an alleged scumbag. In my opinion, he's a scumbag for the way he treated his staff during COVID. For I, I, that's not even taking into account his views on Brexit and all that sort of stuff. I fundamentally disagree with most of what he does and says. But they do cheap breakfast. I have to agree. He has got some challenging views for sure. For sure. But what's I going to say? As I was telling you this earlier. Oh, we went to Morrison's today. Morrison's is a UK supermarket that when you go to a big enough Morrison's, they've got a CAF, a restaurant, somewhere you can have a hot meal attached to it.

36:54 So they've decided to jazz up, not even jazz up the menu. It's the same stuff, but they've jazzed up how it's presented and served, which is absolutely farcical because it's still a supermarket calf. And so my kids didn't eat what they and we had basically a meltdown. It was thoroughly disappointing because what you really want is chips, bean sausage, not fancy chips in a tin cup and a Sau Sant of beans. And you know, you just want it on a plate, Bosch, Bosch, Bosch. The lasagna, my boy has had Morrison lasagna for years.

37:36 He's like a we go there after school, especially after the breakup. We like easy kids, my night done. And so yeah, the lasagna comes out today. It's got cherry tomatoes and a bit of rocket salad on the on the side. And he's like, what's this? It's lasagna. But it's all done like you're in a swanky pub. It's just not what you're there for, is it? It really isn't. You've got to know what you're getting into, which is why, God, I feel like I'm going screen share crazy here, but I'm going to do it for a third time because I don't know if I've ever mentioned this site before, but it is one of the best sites to go on when you fancy a breakfast.

38:19 It's called ifancyafryup.co.uk. Oh, and fry-ups are rated around, is it global or just the UK? Just okay, probably just the UK. It is so you and I live pretty much in or near Maidstone. So let's go. Maidstone, UK. We're going to do a search, hit the search button, just put in Maidstone, and this will tell you where all the local, I've got a zoom in there, where all the decent fry-ups are, not just where they are, but then it'll also give you the chance to go in and rate them. Oh, there aren't many that have been done. I can tell you the Cox Heath Cafe in Cox Heath.

38:59 That's a good fry up Maidstone. There's one around the back of the Marks and Spencer's in town. I think it's called The Rose Cafe. That's been years. That is a good fry-up. Because that's what you need. And sometimes you find yourself in a strange place and you fancy a fry-up, but you've got no idea where to go. And then when you do that, are they going to be proper good? Are they going to have tea in a pot or a mug? Oh, look, these ones do it as a mug. Tomatoes. when they serve them, are they fresh or tinned? You can have both arrival here. They have black pudding. Unfortunately, they do chips on it as well. So, but it gives you an idea of what's what. And they also, for some of them, obviously the ones that get more visited, they'll have reviews and stuff like that as well.

39:40 This is a perfect thing. So, we now know the Oak Dean Cafe, where it is, and it's a great old-fashioned biker and truck stop caf, well located for Brown's Hatch or Kent's Country Roads. I recommend having a look at I fancy a this is not sponsored, by the way. No, we might if you see t-shirts, you might we might be sponsored another day. Uh, to fry up.co.uk, give it a butcher's next time you need some bacon in your mush. Nadine, our kind of uh lady, lady of the night, lady sharing the show with us, she wants to know why we're going to these cheap places. Well, I think that's just what blokes do, isn't it? We just like calfs, sit down, get the paper, get the bet, get the get the bettings.

40:23 Back in the day, we'd go and get the betting slips and sit and have a calf. And that really was back in the day. Well, it's weird. I find if you find a really good calf, um, quantity and quality rarely go hand in hand, and so you'll find that you might have really nice sausages where they could name the bloody pig that it was, and um, they can tell you which way the field that the potatoes grew in was pointed. I don't give a shit about any of that, but then they'll give you like one tiny little tomato, a little chipolata, one streaky bacon bit, and a little quail's egg and cost you 20 quid. No, yeah, I there and I love fine dining, and you I think I've shared with you some of my fry ups.

41:05 I, it's an art form, but you sometimes you just need a lot of it to soak up whatever was in there from the night before. Yeah, it's got to be a plate of food, a whole plate of food, whole plate of food. Uh, the worst people for that, the shittest place to go and eat. I have no idea how this chain still exists, and I think they're pretty much our closing after lockdown. Frankie and Benny's. Oh, yeah, they're not gross food, it's a charade, a charade, uh, a mockery, an absolute crime against chefs around the world. I'll tell you what, if you know, I'd like to actually do you know, bottomless brunches where you turn up to somewhere and they say, Right, you've got two hours, and here's the menu.

41:52 You can have as much of it. There's a place called, I think it's like Wings or something like that, where you basically have as many chicken wings as you want and free champagne or whatever it is for the time you're there, and you stay there. They're called a bottomless brunch. If someone was to say, fry up bottomless brunch and X amount of booze as well, I'll be there tomorrow. That's the Dubai. Isn't that a big thing in Dubai? It's in London. There's some great places in London. I think we need to go out on a bit of a recce and find the best bottomless brunch in London. I can tell you pretty much the best brunch I've had, both in food and location.

42:33 And this is a good tip for anyone visiting Chicago if they still do it. It's a bit Benedict, innit? I know, but they do a all-you-can-eat brunch up the John Hancock. And like the top floor is the top floor, is like the whatever, the 150th floor or something. It's like the ninth tallest building in the world, which when you're in the realms of tallest buildings, that's good enough, right? Plus, it's on the lakefront, so it's pretty epic. Um, and uh, yeah, so then the then the flipping restaurant is one floor down, and it costs about 25 bucks to go to the to the top floor.

43:13 Well, go one floor down and get the 40 bucks breakfast brunch thing, absolutely epic, absolutely brilliant. That's definitely one of the best brunches I've had. Sounds awesome. I would happily give that a go. But like I say, you pick up the travel, I'll pick up the brunch. Okay, so we need a business deal. Okay, well, I do have a plan for Team Super Dad. One of the visions for Team Super Dad was always because I got my family in Chicago, was to create a reason to be in Chicago/slash Florida on a more regular basis on business. So, Team Superdad and the Hero Academy and the firewalking events is the perfect platform to have

43:52 weekend events, have retreats, have community meetups, mastermind meetings in Chicago. So, obviously, as one of the presenters, senior executive members of the Team Super Dad team, Glenn, that you're in on that. So, in fact, let's book out. By the way, the restaurant rotates on a circle. Let's book out and have our do the brunch there. Okay, you heard. it here first. We are going to the John Hancock for dinner. Dean wants to know why we do this on a Monday night. I've done it today, I'm absolutely with you. Um, and you never know it, you never know what the next week's going to bring.

44:35 But um, we do it on Monday just so we can wrap up the weekend just gone and uh to hang out. And guys, we don't get the chance always just to hang out with other people in the pub anymore. You know, this is this is the modern day and age, and sometimes it's nice just to chat, connect, and uh shoot the breeze and make sure everyone feels slightly less alone. But absolutely, actually, Glenn, just to hit the nail on the head there, when in some of my darkest days, um, pre-breakup, after breakup, this isn't about single dads, pit dads break up, and this is about families, this is about men creating the relationships that work, it's about being the kind of guy that our partner is in love with and being the kind of guy that's having as much fun and enjoying life as possible.

45:20 So, but in those dark times, this is for you, you know, talking to you, Nadine. In those dark times, I got into listening to podcasts massively. And some of the funnier ones really were what kept me flipping sane. Like the conversations, the chit chat, especially after broke up and first moved into our home, this place I'm recording from now. Um, those nights when it was just me were flipping empty, and so there was a variety of podcasts I discovered where it was literally like having a bunch of mates there with me and kept me sane. So that's part of what this is. That's part of what this is. And mostly, though, we do it so that people like Nadine will get in touch and uh share their views with the world.

46:04 So, uh, you've you've basically made our week, certainly made mine anyway. Uh, but we haven't talked about our weekends, by the way. Did you have a good weekend, Glenn? Yeah, it was none too shabby. Um, the dating was this weekend, the speed dating. It was, yeah, yeah. So, uh, when I went around a friend's house for dinner on Friday, no, she came around mine to mine for dinner on Friday. Um, and then yeah, went out speed dating on Saturday and then just chilling out on Sunday. It was pretty much a crackdown first draft of Craig Davids at work. Um, then we did a did my blood giving today. I don't know what number I'm up to now, but if you don't give blood, do if there's no reason for you not to, and if it's just because you're scared of needles, then I will come around and find you and slap you because everyone needs to give blood.

46:55 I'm embarrassed to say, and it's not like I'm horribly embarrassed. I've done it once. Why would you go once? Go once you've done it. You've done it. You've proven you can do it. Why go again? Why go once? You can book it online these days. If you like that sort of thing, there's even an app. It's so easy. You book it, you turn up, and because of COVID, I'll tell you what, the last few times I've done it because of COVID, it's none like the old days where there was delay after delay after delay. Bosh, you're in there, bosh, they see you. And yes, they ask you questions about why have you had sex with anyone? I have to say no because I'm fucking single. And then they needle in, needle out, no chit-chat, bang, got and done.

47:36 It's easy and quick, and you help save someone's life. Well, that's the reason I first give blood. The reason I and the only reason I give them blood. So I declare, I declare on the podcast tonight that I will book in and go and give blood this month or in the next 30 days, I will go and give blood. I wanted to do it for the bone marrow thing. There are people dying because they can't find a bone marrow match. And if we were all logged into the system, most of these people would not die because it would be obvious who their match was. And we would be able to go and give some bone marrow and save people. Is that what they need bone marrow transplant for?

48:16 Is it like leukemia? And kids is leukemia, right? We can save living kids as well. Exactly. Every single person watching this, listening to this, that are around you today. It's such a simple thing to do. And can you, I know, you don't get to say where your blood goes, but realistically, could you honestly sit there with a loved one dying in pain? There's a car accident, there's cancer, there's childbirth complications, all these things that could happen. And you've got no control over it, knowing that you have done nothing to contribute and make their lives better, to help save someone's lives. When you could do it in a lunch break, it's just, it blows my mind.

48:56 So I'm glad in the UK now it's donate, you know, organ donor by default. That was always a bit weird to me. Like, why would you need your eyes? Like, why would you... Yeah. Oh, no, that'd be weird. What do you mean that? I'd be weird. Like, even if you're religious, I dare say there's some religions that like kind of written down somewhere that you need your eyes or whatever. But the rest of us, even like the spiritual essence of us, our soul, because I'm pretty much along that line that we're just a spirit being happening to live in this body for a while.

49:34 And but clearly, I don't need my eyes or my heart. I'm flipping bowels, balls, toes, whatever they want to top and give to someone else, then go for it. What a gift you can give. Can you imagine how much of a difference that's going to change someone's life? It's literally going to save it or improve it. There's no two ways about it. I was on the radio the last few weeks or whatever. Someone, they'd say, no, I was listening to a book, actually, one of my audio books. They were saying it must have been the heart. They'd done a heart transplant, and the woman who got the heart, the person whose heart it was, had been murdered.

50:14 And she started having these dreams about it. That's all they were saying. That's what they were saying. And they went and they did this thing and they caught the person. That sounds like bollocks, doesn't it? Absolutely. Utter, complete bollocks. Otherwise, the people who get my blood, they're going to have some fucking weird memories. That's all I'm going to say. Maybe that's why I have weird dreams. I need to talk to my dad. I haven't got a big snatch. That's actually, that's a good evidence. So, Nadim, we've already said you're coming on next time. Can I be the guest bird next time?

50:53 Yeah, you're coming on. On the subject of guest birds, right? I did a, you know, we normally or have done in the past our hot in the 90s feature. We've done it. We've done it from time to time. So they've been showing American Pie on one of the TV. The advert keeps coming up, right? So I searched for, I put into the Google MILF, right? Thinking mum, I'd like to fuck, right? So was it, was there a pretty safe term? I thought MILF was no, all it did was bring up porn sites. Yep. Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. They coined that term, and now it's absolutely any woman who's over the age of about 25 is classed as a MILF.

51:37 If you can look like you're younger, then they go for some disgusting teen thing, apparently. The internet's all messed up. Back in the day, you could put boobs into Google and you get loads of pictures of boobs. Like simple stuff. Simple, simple, good, honest, you know, see list porn, right? Just boobs. Just put in boobs. So you can't do that anymore. Google won't show you boobs, right? But you put in MILF, and there's like a whole long list of porn sites. Porn sites are rotten. The things you can see on a porn site are absolutely wrong. Back in the day. And you've been trying to get through it all to make sure that you've done your research.

52:20 Well, yeah, I can't talk about something unless I've done a good level of detailed research. I'm a serious broadcaster, right? But yeah, back in the day, a nervous, stretched-out arm, top shelf, club, razzle, centre spread, readers' letters, happy days. That's about as wrong as it got, right? Basically, but not now. Be that bothered about catching their lad with a copy of Razzle stuffed under his mattress, right? That's kind of. It's never going to happen. It's all hidden away on Kindles or something like that, I'm sure.

53:03 The thing about American Pie that gets me, the thing that freaks me out and makes me feel ancient. The original MILF, Stifler's mum, Jennifer Coolidge. Yeah. How old was she in that movie? She had to be 50, I reckon. 37. What? She's now 57 years old or 57, 57. No, she was 39, 39, sorry. 39 years old. To be fair, I don't think I have a question here. I just presumed she it's it's mental because again, I was so this film came out in 99.

53:42 So I was 18 going on 19 then. And of course, I was the same age as the kids or the actors anyway, but roughly the same age as the kids in it. So I identified as one of those. And so always saw Stifler's mum as really old. Yes. She's not real. But she's not. She was 39 years old. That's younger than me. That's a year younger than me. Yeah. It blew my tiny little mind. when I discovered that fact. I kind of wish I could take it out of my head now and forget about it. That is such a good movie. It's absolute gold, absolute gold. Still, still holds its own if you watch it back.

54:22 It's a classic, classic movie. Although now, I think identify more with Eugene Levy than anyone else. Eugene, the dad, yeah. That's who you identify now. I think I haven't seen it in a long time, but you know what? Yeah, I think I'm closer to him than I am to anyone else. Well, no, listen, before we start to wrap up the wrap-up, and I think I want to talk about this over the next couple of weeks because my boy's going to school. I think I want to sit down and have a chat with him. Not necessarily birds and bees, but I want to run him through a list of like words and phrases just so he doesn't like. I want to tell him every

55:05 what it called it. What's the word? Like every euphemism? Every possible slang term, euphemism for a cock. No, see, no, but that's part of the thing about growing up is he's gonna he's gonna learn these phrases. He's gonna discover them, and there'll be a whole bunch of them that you won't understand because these will be modern things. But the whole point is they discover it as an age group and they all come up with these terms and they all do it at the same pace. Um, otherwise, I'm gonna ruin things. Oh, no, but then I don't want him like

55:44 what's a cunt, you know, like that's part of growing up for him. Then he has to go to Google. So I'm not helping him with a right of passage. I'm putting the drawbridge back. I mean, I'm not saying I'm right. It's just my personal opinion as a dad is there's some things where you do want to make sure. So you want to make sure before they go to secondary school, they know there's no such thing as Father Christmas. Sorry, spoiler alert. But you want, there's things about childhood that you want them to kind of make sure they're prepared.

56:21 So they're not going to get the piss ripped out of them. But there's other things they have to discover as part of their friendship group and they have to have those conversations themselves. Blowjob, what about blowjob? I don't think he needs to be. He is wondering what that was. I thought it was something that blowed. I didn't, I didn't all-boy school and then another all-boys school, right? So you know all about blowjobs. My dad's attitude to the talks was he goes, my dad never told me nothing. I'm not talking. And that's me. There's a balancing act. There is. And I think he will be more open with you. And he might, he will say, Dad, look, I've heard what does this mean?

57:01 And he might have that because you've got a much stronger, tighter relationship than it sounds like you had with your dad. But it's that pace of things and that collegiate spirit. Otherwise, you take that away because I'm pretty sure his friends won't be having those conversations with their parents. And so it speeds things up for one person, but the rest of them are left behind. And it creates a disparity. So I could inadvertently become Eugene. Pretty much. For me, it's all about answering the questions and making sure they feel they can ask anything, but not forcing that knowledge upon them. Okay. Okay. Now, that's good. That's wisdom there, Glenn, because you have got a couple of kids older than me. That's good.

57:44 Okay, so we are making sure that they know, a bit like the Wizard of Oz, they know we're up there. We're ready. You can come and ask a question when you want. But until that point, you've just got to walk the path yourself. Yeah. Okay. That way they'll walk it at their own pace and carry their own knowledge. Nadine. I love you, Nadine. Nadine says she's actually married. She's dropped in here. She's got a husband. But she does have some friends. She says here, keep away from the PE teacher. That is true in so many respects.

58:22 The PE teacher. Well, yeah, also indicating the length of their shorts will give you a gauge of what kind of PE teacher they are as well. We had some golden PE teachers. I quite like the ones that were nasty, like, you know, if you didn't play well, they'd make you do laugh till you cried. I think that's character building. Hey, it's the same approach with my sex life. Well, obviously, for our regular listeners, you know that I went five.

59:05 five and a half years dry after my separation, but now making up for lost time for sure. Good man. On that note, it sounds like we better wrap up so you can blow some sweet nothings in your other half's direction. Yes, all the way over in Ashford. We'll be back next week. The wrap-up. It's our 50th episode coming up. If you've got any suggestions, thoughts, ideas, Nadine's giving me the all over here. Naked showers after swimming. Oh, the PE teacher. Yeah, okay. Sorry, Nadine. I was off on a different tangent there.

59:51 We'll leave that. We'll leave that sleeping dog lying over there. The next episode of the wrap-up will be the 50th show, the 50th wrap-up. She's due on bank holiday, although Glenn's got his mum down for the weekend. In my mind, I was thinking of that episode of OnlyFoals and Horses where they go on the day trip to Margate on the Beano. I was kind of imagining Glenn and I absolutely sunburnt. I'm not saying it's not going to happen. I'm not saying that will not happen, my friend. Doing the outside broadcast because we've got the equipment. We can do an outside broadcast. If you bring both your microphones. And the stands. And we'd have to have either someone's Wi-Fi that they were letting us hook onto or tether my phone with enough juice.

1:00:36 But we'll work on that. So you might see us for a bank holiday special, 50th episode bank holiday special. Or you won't. But whatever happens, the 50th episode of the wrap-up is coming next. So let us know your highlights. If you've had a magic moment from any of the last 50th episodes, if you're a real nutter, you can go back and listen to all 50 episodes and tell us which was your favorite. I think we'll offer a prize for that, Glenn. If someone could summarize the last 50 episodes, I'll give them a £50 Amazon voucher. How about that? A pound an episode. That's impressive. That's good. Value. Yeah, that's good value.