Ep141: Is being kind to yourself the secret to success?

00:51 Welcome to Unfrazzle, a podcast for solo business owners with a big vision who are ready for a kinder more sustainable approach to productivity. I'm Louise Miller and each week i share bite-sized insights to help you step away from the hustle stop faffing and stay focused so you can make your brilliant ideas happen and make a bigger impact in the world Before we dive into today's episode, if you enjoy what I'm sharing here on Unfrazzle and you'd like to support the podcast. You can buy me a cuppa by going to BuyMeACoffee.com slash Louise Miller and making a one-off donation. I'll pop a link to that in the show notes Okay grab yourself a cuppa and let's get started

01:31 I love guesting on other people's podcasts, so quick side note if you have a podcast and you're looking for guests do let me know. But one of the things it says in my bio for when hosts introduce me is that i help people land their ideas in reality reach more people and make a bigger impact whilst taking care of everything they're juggling day to day and being kind to themselves along the way but is it really possible to make an impact and grow your business whilst also being kind to yourself? Now the short answer is yes But because if I just left it there that would make this a very short episode, even by my standards. So let's dive into that a little bit more so let's think for a moment about what happens when you're not being kind to yourself when you're working all the hours constantly berating yourself because you didn't get enough done comparing yourself with everyone around you and feeling rubbish as a result

02:17 I think we can agree that's not what kindness looks like, right? And living your life and running your business from that place has consequences. When you're rushing around working long hours bouncing around all over the place and feeling frazzled or overwhelmed it's impossible to think clearly or make good decisions so instead of investing your time on the things that matter you get caught in the swirl of busy work often without even realizing it And when you're beating yourself up for not getting enough done or comparing yourself to everyone else, you start to feel like you're failing. That you're not good enough that there's something wrong with you. Your self-esteem suffers your self belief suffers your confidence suffers and when those things are on the floor it's impossible to show up with confidence and clarity in your business

02:59 And if those patterns continue for too long it can result in burnout. You might start falling out of love with your business, you might start resenting your clients and again when that's what's going on how can you possibly make a bigger impact and grow? So being kind to yourself whilst also juggling all other things isn't a nice-to-have it's a necessity So in practice that looks like taking breaks even when you're busy and even when you're having a great time doing something that excites you. Your brain does its best problem solving when you're doing something else so breaks are a great way of accidentally stumbling upon creative solutions to problems, being kind also looks like celebrating the big things

03:37 How often do you achieve something amazing in your business and then blow straight by it, moving on to the next thing? Or going straight into thinking about what you could have done better instead of acknowledging the incredible thing you just accomplished. You're depriving yourself of so much good stuff when you don't give yourself space to enjoy that feeling of having achieved something that a previous version of you could only have dreamed of! So make sure you pause and take a moment to feel all those feels when something amazing happens in your business But it's not just about the big things. Being kind to yourself also means celebrating the small things, in fact I'd argue it's even more important to celebrate the small things because that's what keeps us moving forward so celebrate every time you do something that feels uncomfortable or hard whether that's asking for a testimonial or reaching out to offer your service to someone you love to work with. Celebrate every time you feel tired and choose to rest

04:27 Celebrate every time a client tells you they love the work you're doing. Noticing all those small things will keep your cup topped up with good vibes, strengthening your belief in yourself as someone who knows what they're doing can do hard things and is doing an incredible job for the people they serve. And the more you strengthen those neural pathways, the weaker those less helpful ones will become –the ones that try to convince you that you are not enough! So let's replace those unkind thoughts with more empowering thoughts & beliefs And Being Kind to Yourself also looks like taking care of future you by writing to-do lists and plans that aren't going to send them into a tailspin. When you try and cram so much doing into a single day, week or month when you're trying to do way too much

05:10 You're creating a problem that future you is going to have to deal with at some point, either by working themselves into the ground or feeling like a failure when they don't get it all done. Or maybe both! So what if today-you could be kind to future-you by not giving them more than they can handle? And I know that's easier said than done, but that is essentially what we do together in Make It Happen Club. When you create plans with me i make sure that today you is not creating a mess for future you to deal with when you make your plans thoughtfully and give them room to breathe you're setting future you up for greatness And all of those things, taking breaks celebrating making achievable spacious plans will help you make a bigger impact because they'll boost your resilience and your confidence as well as your productivity. You'll see yourself making progress which will expand your sense of what's possible and then from there the sky is the limit so what's one thing you can do today to be kind to yourself? So you can make an impact and grow your business! What can you do tomorrow? As always I hope that this helps and i look forward to seeing you again soon

06:14 Thank you for listening to Unfrazzle. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe and share it with a friend who needs a dose of calm productivity in their life and I'd love it if you could leave me a rating or review as that will help more people discover the podcast And if you're struggling with productivity right now, take my free assessment to find out what's really getting in the way of you getting things done. It takes less than three minutes to complete and I'll send you tailored resources and insights that will help based on your score You'll find that at louisemiller.uk slash quiz and there's a link for that in the show notes So thank you so much for being here and I look forward to seeing you next time